New for BDSM

[GiggsBeckham11]

Im a 32 year old male doctor living in Chicago. I have recently become very interested in being dominated and exploring that aspect of my sexuality. I think it has something to do with me having to be in charge of other people all day long that now I want someone else to be in control. I would love to hear peoples thoughts about how to proceed and just more about this lifestyle in general!

 

[CutieMouse]

A good place to start is reading the Library thread stickied up at the top of this forum. Welcome to Lit and good luck in finding the answers you're searching for. (Warning- if you're anything like me the more answers you discover the more questions you'll think of. )

 

[Daddyslilpet]

Welcome to Lit and Happy researching to you!

 

[Aeroil]

ah, welcome . Are you planning on staying? most of the male subs that come here never stay long at all, there needs to be more sane male subs on the board lol. anyway, hope your search goes well, the libraries are a good source, and if you can't find something then just ask us .

 

[Marquis]

there needs to be more sane male subs on the board lol.

Which one of you is sane?

 

[SweetDommes]

Which one of you is sane?

LOL, tha'ts exactly what I was going to ask...

ghosstie will admit that he's certifiable most days

 

[Aeroil]

ah, I was actually making a crack against jeffery, I'm a bit wierd at times but I'm definately sane lol

 

[Dstorage]

Some options on ways to proceed- There used to be a group that met at Ann Sathers (broadway & belmont), also pay a visit to the House Of Whacks, I don't know if the Leather Rose is still open, but try them too. Put a personal in the Reader.

Crimson Moon is in Chgo but more oriented towards spanking, but people there could probably make sugestions.

Have fun,

DS

 

[sphynx's dragon]

...i think i'm sane....aren't i? <shrug> maybe i should ask... <shakes himself> anyway welcome! a understanding Woman is always helpful. i feel very lucky in that regard!

 

[Xelebes]

ah, welcome . Are you planning on staying? most of the male subs that come here never stay long at all, there needs to be more sane male subs on the board lol. anyway, hope your search goes well, the libraries are a good source, and if you can't find something then just ask us .

I think I am only the long term male sub poster in this forum - with the exception of maybe Ghost.

Edit - Welcome. No, I haven't had any success in my quests because I don't think I have gone on any quests. Right now in a passive mode still trying to get other things done in my life.

 

[SweetDommes]

I think I am only the long term male sub poster in this forum - with the exception of maybe Ghost.

"maybe ghosst"?? Um, yeah, I would say that ghosst would definately be an exception ... not to mention that there are others who post ... apparently not in the same threads that you do, but that doesn't mean that they aren't here ...

 

[Xelebes]

Oh they're here alright just that I don't see them post.

*reminds himself to bump the Male Sub thread.*

 

[Aeroil]

...i think i'm sane....aren't i? <shrug> maybe i should ask... <shakes himself> anyway welcome! a understanding Woman is always helpful. i feel very lucky in that regard!

oh, sorry dragon, forgot about you lol, but you've not been here very long. Oh, also xele, you've been here longer but I'm posting about twice as much as you.

 

[Xelebes]

Yeah, sorry about confusing you for a girl. I'm not gonna live that down here.

 

[GiggsBeckham11]

Thanks for all of the replies. It's nice to know that there is a community for people searching for this. You rthoughts are all good. I've checked out the library some and find it useful. As far as meeting groups of people in Chicago I'm still not there yet. Would rather get to know about this sort of thing from a board like this, and possibly a meeting some day with a dominant woman. Only time will tell...

 

[CutieMouse]

Well take heart... maybe you're like me- a research junkie who tends to be a bit slow and cautious. LOL I started looking into things almsot 2 years ago, pestered everyone a Lit a LOT over the last 6-9 months, went to my first munch last month, and plan on going to it again this month, plus attending a BDSM conference in the area in a couple weeks. LOL You'll find what you need at your own pace. Enjoy the journey.

 

[GiggsBeckham11]

Well said. I mostly want to meet someone who I trust and get along with that I can feel comfortable exploring this slowly. Do you think people can find that here or should I look on some other boards?

 

[D's mariposa]

When you're ready, pop over to the bdsm personals board, and see what comes up that way.

Welcome. I did the same thing as you and cutie mouse, too. That is, researched and thought and pondered and then explored. I found my Sir at our local group. Ironically enough, he was the membership chair of the group.

 

[SweetDommes]

LOL, he started out at the personals board and I directed him here ...

Anyway, if you would feel more comfortable in coming to a munch where you have at least talked to someone who goes, I will be at the Lafayette munch this month - it's the 27th and I can give you time and directions if you are interested.

 

[LunarKitten]

I did the online research and chat communities for two years before an online friend from a city over became my mentor and drug me into the realtime local groups in Charlotte and the surrounding areas. I will be forever greatful to him taking me under his wing and teaching me that it was ok want to learn more and to experience more. I think I was actually lucky in this regard, I had someone to look out for me, to teach me, who wasn't interested in getting into my pants.

My advise, do some research. Find out what you want to learn, what you are curious about, and what you definatly don't want to ever ever ever do (but know that sometimes those things on your hard list will someday be something you become curious about trying lol)...then find you local munch group or educational group. Find someone within who is willing to mentor you (most say someone of the same orientation as you, so another male bottom, though mine was actually a male Dominant so rules are set in stone) in a subject you want to learn about (I got this from one of Daddy Ed's lectures - don't try to overwhelm someone with teaching you everything, find someone who does something really well and ask if they are willing to teach you how they do/deal with this).