New author's vampire story

[bondagekitten]

Bondagekitten- Big Night Out- Erotic Horror
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=371729

So I wrote this with the intent of creating a new take on vampires- as ferociously hungry, ferociously horny, unstoppably cruel beasts whose appetites have not been changed- simply taken to the logical extreme. I think it's a novel change, and an attempt to depart from the (in my opinion, over-homogenized and samey) traditions of vampire fiction.
That said, it's still my lowest rated story on here.
So I'm calling out to you vampire readers, and to those who just like a good nonconsentual story with a lot of background- tell me what to do in the future! Also- if you see anything in any of my other stories you like or dislike, kindly comment, I'm young yet and love criticism or compliments in any form.

(By the way, if you want something more typical of my style, try this:
Bondagekitten- Samantha's Career Ch. 01- BDSM
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=371733)

Thank you very much in advance, and enjoy-
BK

 

[The_Fractal_King]

Bondagekitten- Big Night Out- Erotic Horror
http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=371729

So I wrote this with the intent of creating a new take on vampires- as ferociously hungry, ferociously horny, unstoppably cruel beasts whose appetites have not been changed- simply taken to the logical extreme.

It's very well written, especially the subtly increasing influence of the vampires and eroticizing the blood drinking. I wouldn't call it an original take on vampires (they've been done in every way imaginable already) but it's certainly not the hyper-romaticized stuff that one usually finds in the genera.

 

[manyeyedhydra]

It's well written, but it's still vampires.

You need to read some older horror if you genuinely think this is a new take

It is nice to see vamps as unequivocally cruel monsters again though. Personally I think I would have preferred it had you followed through with his threat and ended with her body dumped in a river. I'm probably in a minority there though

Nothing technically wrong I could see, it's the usual problem of trying to inject some freshness into a well-trod trope.

 

[bondagekitten]

Thanks to both of you for your advice and evaluation. I'm aware that there is nothing new under the moon for vampires, but like you said, Hydra- as long as they're not prancing, pansy hot-topic goth kids with two-tooth overbites, they're at least interesting.