Nationwide Poll: What's the worst thing a girl could do to a guy who dumped her?

[thrillerauthor]

Help me test the premise for a story idea by taking part in a nationwide poll.

Click here to take part in the poll

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Any woman who would come up with such a lame plan for getting back at the guy, has a very, very poor sense of imagination!!!


(I could think of something MUUUUUUUUUUUCH worse!)

 

[KillerMuffin]

The worst thing I can think of at the moment involves a dull knife, a sharp knife, a filleting knife, a set of forceps, some clamps, strong rope, duct tape, gun powder, jalapeno juice, chains, a spreader bar, a blow torch, a really remote area, and about a month of free time.

 

[thrillerauthor]

Ouch!

You and Killermuffin play for keeps! Remember I'm a guy, and anything remotely resembling a knife appraching that part of my anatomy moves this into the horror genre. When I came up with the idea for the opening scene in The Jessica Project, I was trying to set the stage for something unique in the annals of literature: a lesbian love scene between a man and a woman. Turning the poor guy into a gelding would have spoiled all the fun.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/1591294592.01.THUMBZZZ.jpg

 

[Svenskaflicka]

My mind goes more to the psychological terror, and not so much torture itself. I think my method is much more sophisticated, much more fun! Take for instance this joke...

A man and a woman are making love, when suddenly her husband barges into the room and catches them "in the act". He is furious, and hits the man so hard, that the man faints.

When the man wakes up, he's sitting in a barn out in the country, completely naked, and his penis is caught tightly in a vise. Next to him, the husband of the woman is sharpening a knife.

"Oh, no!" cries the man. "You're not gonna caught it off, are you???"

"Noooo..." says the husband. "The knife is for you. I'm just going to set fire to this barn..."

 

[flawed_ethics]

Best I heard of yet:

Restrain the guy. Get him hard, and then insert a thin, glass rod down his penis. That enough should destroy him.

Then go the extra measure and smack his dick, shattering the rod inside.

He'll want to cut his dick off then.

 

[chicagophotoman]

something different

ok, this doesnt answer your poll, but heres a take on this situation. In a college, A girl catches her boyfriend cheating on her, so shes pissed so to get back at him she goes out and takes some pictures of her sucking several guys dicks then sends the pictures to him thinking he'll take it hard and feel like a jerk. Instead he send the pictures home to HER parents and writes on them "Having a great time at school!". Could be a good story.

 

[alltherage]

Get him naked, point and laugh hysterically.

 

[thrillerauthor]

My next novel. As I envision the scene you have proposed, when her mother and father open the mail, they die of simultaneous heart attacks. Two weeks later, when she returns home for spring break, she finds their rotting corpses with pictures of her giving blow jobs clutched in their cold, dead hands. If you think Hollywood would green-light this for a major motion picture, I'll skip the novel and go right to work on the screenplay.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/1591294592.01.THUMBZZZ.jpg

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Glass rod...

*bowing to the master*

 

[Shaft]

Have hot, steamy lesbian sex with several of her attractive girlfriends and force him to watch.


I know that would devastate me.....





*cough*

 

[shopperst]

My mind goes more to the psychological terror, and not so much torture itself. I think my method is much more sophisticated, much more fun! Take for instance this joke...

A man and a woman are making love, when suddenly her husband barges into the room and catches them "in the act". He is furious, and hits the man so hard, that the man faints.

When the man wakes up, he's sitting in a barn out in the country, completely naked, and his penis is caught tightly in a vise. Next to him, the husband of the woman is sharpening a knife.

"Oh, no!" cries the man. "You're not gonna caught it off, are you???"

"Noooo..." says the husband. "The knife is for you. I'm just going to set fire to this barn..."

Good one

 

[thrillerauthor]

Poll Results So Far

Obviously I came to the right place. Since I started this thread, the polling site has been swamped! Here is a running tally of the poll results as of a few minutes ago:

What would the typical guy do?

Put on the dress and try to make it home (54%)


Call his friends for help and become a laughingstock (36%)


Walk home naked (5%)


Stay in the hotel room until he dies (3%)


176 total votes


Click here to cast your vote!

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/1591294592.01.THUMBZZZ.jpg

 

[the_bragis]

Hello thrillerauthor,

I didn't have to think about this one long. This would be my ulitmate revenge:

I would find out when he had a day off. Then wearing the scruffiest clothes I could find, I would borrow someone's baby and put it in the shabbiest pram I could lay my hands on. I would go into his place of work and ask for him. When they informed me me he wasn't in - I would say pleadingly "But are you sure?", and then I would act very reluctant to leave.

OH would I really do that? I hope I never have to find out.

Have a great day now,

Alex (fem).

 

[Svenskaflicka]

*applause*

Brava, Alex!!! Brava!!!

 

[MsLinnet]

Pick up his best mate or his boss and fuck his brains out and tell him that he was a lot better than her Ex

Love Lin

 

[BlackSnake]

Pick up his best mate or his boss and fuck his brains out and tell him that he was a lot better than her Ex

Love Lin

Hey you Good to see you.

Now, when they go back to him and brag, he may get meaner. He might tell them that he dumped you because you were hiding the fact that you had aids. He confronted you with it and you denied it, but he had seen a test result. Lucky for him that the two of you always wore a condom. You aids condition was the reason for the condoms. He hopes that they wore condoms too. He is currently being tested for aids.


I figure like this...if you mess with is tools, you had better kill him, because he will kill you.

 

[BlackSnake]

.

 

[Violette]

Messing with his "tool", as you call it, is pointless. The best way to enact truly fierce revenge is to fuck with his MIND. Anticipation of an ass-whupping can be more stressful than the actual whupping, and besides, the emotional impact lasts MUCH longer!

Or as Foxy Brown might say, "I want you to SUFFER, bitch!!!"

As for what I'd do, I'd force-feed him 25 stuffed burritos from Taco Bell, tie him down on the toilet and toss in a cherry bomb to float right under his ass...!

 

[RandomInk]

Whatever you do, don't mess with his car.

If you want torture the "Gluttony" guy from Seven comes to mind. Or you tie him under a pickup and drive through a cactus patch (Sideshow Bob).

If you really want torture you could go the old school aproach. all you need is a bamboo hut, a firepit with red hot coals, assortment of iron devices to poke and prod, a scapel, high pressure squirt gun, car battery and jumper cables (or use a capacitor for a stronger jolt), assorted broken glass, peyote, twinkies, stapler, hairspray and lighter, and a whipping cane.

 

[destinie21]

What I would do is simple

all you need is super glue,and a poliroaid camera

use alot of foreplay to get him hard then tell him you want to see him jerk off then get him to let you apply Lubrication to his hand just squirt the super glue into his hand .

hilarity will ensue

smile for your close up sweetie

 

[RandomInk]

I think some guys would severly hurt themselves that way

 

[destinie21]

duh

I think some guys would severly hurt themselves that way

yes well hell hath no fury ......

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I know what a friend of mine did to get back at a bitch who had been evil to her (no, they weren't lovers. This woman had just been badmouthing my friend in the nieghborhood). She told people that she had seen this woman going off in a car with an old man. Must have been her grandfather, cause they hugged each other, and she even kissed him on the cheek. And, wow, her grandfather must be really rich, he had a very nice car...

And everyone knew that that woman didn't have any of her two grandfathers alive...

That's how you do it. Innocent comments, that no-one can really scold you for saying. But said in such a way that people will start thinking dirty thoughts...

Another time, she and her mother were discussing the issue of pay-back with a very rude man, who claimed that a woman couldn't really do anything to defend herself against an abusive man, because men are stronger than women. My friend smiled coldly, and said in a calm voice: "Every man has to sleep SOMETIMES..."

Never mess with my friend. She can fuck up your mind so that you'll jump in fear every time you see your own shadow...

 

[zorrro69]

The worst thing is to turn him into a gay against his will. May be she will set him a some kind of a trap and then balckmails him to do a gandbang with a real faggots, while she wathches.