my personals ad.

[4degrees]

long walks on the beach
long walks on the beach
long walks on the beach
long walks on the beach
long walks on the beach
long walks on the beach

endless libido
can start fires by rubbing sticks together
and puts them out
with all the tears you'll cry.

box number 462

 

[Lauren Hynde]

http://no-troy.planetaclix.pt/images/a29_Ads_4.jpg

 

[4degrees]

misanthropic
industrial worker
enjoys
the sounds of
nails on a chalkboard,
vacuuming my genitalia.
word games and
long walks on the beach.

financially/mentally
bankrupt.
i've found that money/sanity
are overrated.
seeks same, must be
willing to travel.
far.

 

[WickedEve]

vacuuming genitalia?

I have a hoover self-propelled wind tunnel. I sucked up some crayons, hair bows, and a lost plastic cow with it earlier today. I think you'd enjoy it.

 

[Liar]

Me, blah blah blah
blah
blah blah blah
blah
blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah blah
blah blah but I'm trying.

You, blah blah
blah blah blah blah
blah
blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah
blah blah
blah blah blah with a heart of gold.

Will emigrate. Will not convert.

 

[annaswirls]

slut with overactive imagination seeks
basically harmless pervert to provide activation energy
and accept the chain reactions that follow
and follow and follow

 

[annaswirls]

oh I forgot the vacuum.

I have pretty good suction here
but crayons do not satisfy my fixation

only willing to travel electronically

 

[Liar]

only willing to travel electronically

Just ask and I'll fax you.

 

[annaswirls]

Just ask and I'll fax you.

You will fax me across the ocean?
I don't think I could fit into the feeder....
I guess I could just send my panties....

or if you want to fax yourself, I will tell you the next time my boss is out of the office.

 

[flyguy69]

Liar and Anna are faxing right in front of us? Get a room, you two!

 

[4degrees]

seeking:
one somebody
to infect me with
purpose
and inspire me to
propagate,
preferably
improperly.

box 1255

 

[always_smiling]

A revengeful ex-wife
seeks two men
with one holding
a video camera
to take shots and record
the other
with his cock up my ass,
and my pearly whites
smiling
from pleasure,
so I can send the smut
to my ex-husband
to prove
I'm happy without him.

 

[flyguy69]

A revengeful ex-wife
seeks two men
with one holding
a video camera
to take shots and record
the other
with his cock up my ass,
and my pearly whites
smiling
from pleasure,
so I can send the smut
to my ex-husband
to prove
I'm happy without him.

Send it to me, too!

 

[WickedEve]

A revengeful ex-wife
seeks two men
with one holding
a video camera
to take shots and record
the other
with his cock up my ass,
and my pearly whites
smiling
from pleasure,
so I can send the smut
to my ex-husband
to prove
I'm happy without him.

Ohhh, bitchy woman with an ex! Hello, sister. I like what you wrote. I love to write poetry inspired by my ex. I was thinking of writing one where he's wedged in the ass of an elephant or his new bride. Same thing.

 

[always_smiling]

Ohhh, bitchy woman with an ex! Hello, sister. I like what you wrote. I love to write poetry inspired by my ex. I was thinking of writing one where he's wedged in the ass of an elephant or his new bride. Same thing.

"Where he's wedged in the ass of an elephant". What a beautiful image. That would be like an enema to the elephant, and can you imagine the wonderful pictures we could take of that when it takes a dump?





A suffocated dead man shooting out an elephant's ass with poo stuffed up his nose, and mouth. Oh, I like it.

 

[WickedEve]

"Where he's wedged in the ass of an elephant". What a beautiful image. That would be like an enema to the elephant, and can you imagine the wonderful pictures we could take of that when it takes a dump?





A suffocated dead man shooting out an elephant's ass with poo stuffed up his nose, and mouth. Oh, I like it.

That's much more gruesome than I imaged it. I usually go for fluffy humor with a bit (or bite) of viciousness. I tend to shy away from poo images--as fflow knows.
Personally, I like the image of him wedged there while the other elephants politely ask the wedgy elephant, "Eww, what's that stuck in your keister?" Then they all giggle.

 

[always_smiling]

That's much more gruesome than I imaged it. I usually go for fluffy humor with a bit (or bite) of viciousness. I tend to shy away from poo images--as fflow knows.
Personally, I like the image of him wedged there while the other elephants politely ask the wedgy elephant, "Eww, what's that stuck in your keister?" Then they all giggle.

Yeah, that does sound kind of cute, but with what you said...ah...I couldn't help myself.


How ya doing there, flyguy? When my ad gets answered and all is done, it's a will do.

 

[Zanzibar]

That's much more gruesome than I imaged it. I usually go for fluffy humor with a bit (or bite) of viciousness. I tend to shy away from poo images--as fflow knows.
Personally, I like the image of him wedged there while the other elephants politely ask the wedgy elephant, "Eww, what's that stuck in your keister?" Then they all giggle.

That's when the first elephant just lets out a long sigh and says, "I've just got HIMroids again."

ba dum bump...

 

[flyguy69]

Ohhh, bitchy woman with an ex! Hello, sister. I like what you wrote. I love to write poetry inspired by my ex. I was thinking of writing one where he's wedged in the ass of an elephant or his new bride. Same thing.

I picture a circus parade for the bride's processional. Flower girls and Bridesmaids all swaying trunk to tail down the aisle. Was your ex a sideshow freak?

 

[Zanzibar]

Now for the ad...

Quiet explorer filled with
unsurpressable humor
and insatiatable appetites
for unconventional sexuality
seeks empassioned
seeker of sensual bliss
to climb erotic mountains
and soar beyond
mundane horizons

 

[always_smiling]

That's when the first elephant just lets out a long sigh and says, "I've just got HIMroids again."

ba dum bump...

Haha...that was funny!

 

[4degrees]

looking for two (2)
to submit
to any and every
whim or desire
no matter how
degrading
it may be.

must be willing
to relocate.
must be willing
to get hurt.

box 4

 

[4degrees]

seeking one
to share
the saltiness
of seawater,
semen, and other
bodily fluids.
must be fluent
in speaking fuck.
tattoos a plus.
i will ruin you
for anyone else,
so be prepared for
a long ride.

box 886

 

[4degrees]

i am:
overflowing
undercooked
and juicy
you are:
overcome
undertow
and hole-y.

perfect.

box 4

 

[BooMerengue]

That's when the first elephant just lets out a long sigh and says, "I've just got HIMroids again."

ba dum bump...

First actual laugh I've had in three days. Thanks, Zan. I needed it!!