My *official* " I'm heaving" thread. (by Roseanne Rosannadanna"

[YogiBare]

I gotta letter from a Mr. Ass Ending in Bayonne, New Jersey and he wrote:

Dear Roseanne Rosannadanna (that's me!),

I am writing this letter just to tell you that I am heaving. You don't have to write back, or nuttin'.

Sincerely,

Ass Ending



Well, I jess godda tell ya, Mr. Ass Ending of Bayonne, NJ, ... that's disgusting! When did they make a law that says that you gotta tell the whole world every time you throw up? Nobody cares!! Next thing you know, you're gonna put up a Big Sign on one of those big blimp things, you know, de ones dat fly over Yankee Stadium and takes those pictures of the players scratching thier crotch, from up in the air, so that they look like little bugs trying to scratch a hole in the dirt, and the sign's gonna say,

ASS ENDING JUST THREW UP!!!

It's just like my sweet little old grandma, Nanna Rosannadanna, used to say, "Who Cares?"

(from offstage) err, Roseanne ...

What do you want, can't you see that I'm talkin'?

(from offstage) I think that was, "I'm leaving", not "I'm heaving".

Oh. ... Never mind.

 

[Siren]

Well dont let the door hit you on the ass on the way out !!!

 

[modest mouse]

Yogi,

There must have been a bottle of wine in your last picnic basket. You are schnockered.

 

[YogiBare]

Well, Mouse, it's like this ...

Maybe it's all that coffee I had today.

 

[Pan718]

As Usual!

I'm SHOCKED! SHOCKED! at the levity of this thread at the expense of that young man who can't decide if he's staying or leaving. His story has all of the pathos of 'Waiting for Godot' without the sense of staging and timing that makes that play a classic. If only he had the decisiveness and clarity of say a...

Samurai Literotican!