My Kind of Rejection

[estragon]

This may be an old Internet wheeze, but I love it. This is the kind of rejection letter I'd love to get:

Kabuki Publications
Tokyo, Japan

Honorable Sir:
We have read your work with inexpressible pleasure. We swear on the sacred memory of our ancestors that we have never before encountered such a masterpiece. If we publish your admirable work, His Majesty the Emperor will undoubtedly insist on it being a model for all future writing and will forbid our publishing any work inferior to yours. Since talents such as yours emerge only once in every thousand years, this would put us out of business, and we must therefore refuse your divine work. We deposit it at your feet, trembling at the thought of the severe judgment we shall receive from future generations for failing to include in our pages work of such sheer genius.

 

[stephen55]

Kabuki Publications
Tokyo, Japan

Sir (we give you the benefit of the doubt),

Your work is drivel. We would send you a bill for our time that you have wasted, but we doubt you have the funds.

Ps; It's "dick", not "dik".

 

[FickleFilly]

I wouldn't take it to personally...
The Japanese people can be really hard to work with especially if you "Gaijin" Not Japanese...

My dad has had many business dealing with the Fuji company over the years... for a while we live there... I do love the country but they never let your forget your an outsider a "Gaijin"

 

[lovecraft68]

This may be an old Internet wheeze, but I love it. This is the kind of rejection letter I'd love to get:

Kabuki Publications
Tokyo, Japan

Honorable Sir:
We have read your work with inexpressible pleasure. We swear on the sacred memory of our ancestors that we have never before encountered such a masterpiece. If we publish your admirable work, His Majesty the Emperor will undoubtedly insist on it being a model for all future writing and will forbid our publishing any work inferior to yours. Since talents such as yours emerge only once in every thousand years, this would put us out of business, and we must therefore refuse your divine work. We deposit it at your feet, trembling at the thought of the severe judgment we shall receive from future generations for failing to include in our pages work of such sheer genius.

Did it come with the high boots or did you wear your own?

 

[Stella_Omega]

I wouldn't take it to personally...
The Japanese people can be really hard to work with especially if you "Gaijin" Not Japanese...

My dad has had many business dealing with the Fuji company over the years... for a while we live there... I do love the country but they never let your forget your an outsider a "Gaijin"

I lived there for a year and a half in the middle of the 80s, and my experience was very much the same.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

My BIL works for Toshiba. They're after him to spend a year or so in Japan so they can promote him to some higher muckety-muck than he already is. Neither he nor my sister want any part of it. He's quite content being the Chief Geek and has no desire to advance any higher, especially if it requires him spending time in Japan.