My girlfriend and I are going to get married this summer. While over the years we have enjoyed sex very much and we have a strong relationship. During sex on of her biggest fanasty's is to have a threesome with another man. This fanasty comes from years of us acting it out with vibrators and dildos while watching porn. Recently she has brought it to my attention that she might like to try it on a one shot deal and maybe also with a woman afterwards. When I am horny I am all for it and think it is hot, but when I am not horny I am so-so on the subject. We have two plans 1) go out and just find somebody attractive and do it. 2) work up to it by going out dancing one night and letting her stray, then if comfortable another night with maybe light sex to make sure we feel comfortable with the situation. My girlfriend has never sleep with anybody but me and would like to try after we are married. So what is the best plan and if anybody else has done this what should I expect after. We both said after we would talk about how we felt to see if it enhances the relationship, but we do not want to ruin our relationship. Let me know your opinion
My girfriend's fanatsy
- Thread starter bigrain
- Start date
Don't fuck up your marriage right after it happens, try it before you buy it so to speak. Try out the threesome shit before you get married, it may very well spell trouble for you after your married. You might as well work things out first, and not later.
crazybbwgirl
Dirty Grandma...
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2003
- Posts
- 31,020
Sounds a little dangerous to me too - especially if you're not 100% into it. PLUS - you better do the 2 chick thing first. My ex and I had a similar agreement. So we did a threesome with his best friend (god it was fun!) But afterwards I flatly refused to reciprocate with a chick! We ended up getting divorced shortly after that - but not really because of that. I'm still a bit uncomfortable when I run into his friend though! lol
peachykeen
bootie shaker
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2002
- Posts
- 9,194
I have no particular experience in this arena; however, it just seems to me like a REAL, REAL baaaad idea to wait until AFTER you are married to try this...
hogjack
Permanent Pause
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2002
- Posts
- 35,617
Volunteer with inadequate credentials - perfect for this case
I am a particularly poor sex partner so I volunteer to be the third part of the threesome. You would have no worries or potential jealousies since my ineptitude would not only make you comfortable but also make your performance be close to a porn star in comparison.
Please let me know if I can be of service to help you two get off to a good start in your exploration of threesomes.
I am a particularly poor sex partner so I volunteer to be the third part of the threesome. You would have no worries or potential jealousies since my ineptitude would not only make you comfortable but also make your performance be close to a porn star in comparison.
Please let me know if I can be of service to help you two get off to a good start in your exploration of threesomes.
sweetnpetite
Intellectual snob
- Joined
- Jan 10, 2003
- Posts
- 9,135
the first year of your marriage is the hardest. this is probably not the best thing to introduce at this time. Unless you want to postpone the wedding (or it is a long way off) and see how this works. But it might take time for you to work threw the things that it brings up. It sounds like it could turn out to be fun for you two, you said your so-so when your not horny, at least your not against it.
Try a little test drive like this. Go to a club together, have her dance with other attractive men while you watch. See how the two of you feel about it. If you have any negative reaction, dont' go any further but maybe try it again the next week if you still want to try. IF it goes well, have her kiss a guy, see how you feel about that. Make it progressive, she might grope him, then maybe they make out in the booth. Be sure to comunicate with each other each step of the way.
Oh, yea, and talk about whats expected and allowed. (No anal with another guy for instance, maybe that's just for you) Do you want a 3some, or do you just want to watch and then be with her after? or do you want mfmf, swapping, all together or what? do you want to be in charge of the action or have her in charge? you could for instance film or take pictures (all parties willing or with an empty camera) and be the 'director' or you could be a BDSM master, or conversly she could or he could. she could master both of you or you could be her master and she then has her submisive in him. (just saying there are many ways this could play out) also, what are the guidlines for your interaction with this other guy? there are infanate varieties here as well from you not being present, you being present but him not knowing (hidding in a closet) openly watching, participating but only with her, participating with him or both, ect ect.
by now, I need to go take a COLD shower, lol.
Try a little test drive like this. Go to a club together, have her dance with other attractive men while you watch. See how the two of you feel about it. If you have any negative reaction, dont' go any further but maybe try it again the next week if you still want to try. IF it goes well, have her kiss a guy, see how you feel about that. Make it progressive, she might grope him, then maybe they make out in the booth. Be sure to comunicate with each other each step of the way.
Oh, yea, and talk about whats expected and allowed. (No anal with another guy for instance, maybe that's just for you) Do you want a 3some, or do you just want to watch and then be with her after? or do you want mfmf, swapping, all together or what? do you want to be in charge of the action or have her in charge? you could for instance film or take pictures (all parties willing or with an empty camera) and be the 'director' or you could be a BDSM master, or conversly she could or he could. she could master both of you or you could be her master and she then has her submisive in him. (just saying there are many ways this could play out) also, what are the guidlines for your interaction with this other guy? there are infanate varieties here as well from you not being present, you being present but him not knowing (hidding in a closet) openly watching, participating but only with her, participating with him or both, ect ect.
by now, I need to go take a COLD shower, lol.
imawildwoman
Virgin
- Joined
- Mar 15, 2003
- Posts
- 6
"safe" threesome
Just a suggestion: have you thought about trying a swinger's club. They are in every major (and some minor) city. They usually only allow couples on most nights.
The reason I suggest this is that many are looking for threesomes with full approval of their mate. We feel this is "safe" because the other couple has usually already discussed it and maybe even experienced it if they are part of a club. Also, difficult emotional entanglements are avoided that way. Everything is out in the open.
Just a suggestion: have you thought about trying a swinger's club. They are in every major (and some minor) city. They usually only allow couples on most nights.
The reason I suggest this is that many are looking for threesomes with full approval of their mate. We feel this is "safe" because the other couple has usually already discussed it and maybe even experienced it if they are part of a club. Also, difficult emotional entanglements are avoided that way. Everything is out in the open.
just a thought! Like I tell my wife of 8 years you can play but you better include me as i don't won't to be left out guy or gal! I may not play but wan't to be with her at all time's and feel that's how a marriage to my best friend should be if she or i play. with any one else!
Mr. J
Mr. J
