My Ex-girlfriend Lives With Me..

[Lost Cause]

Some will say I'm a sucker, nice guys finish last, I'm just being an enabler. She and I split in 2000 when she needed to be on her own. In 2001, she got fucked over by this piece of work boyfriend of hers, and lost her apartment. the guy walked with most of her cash, so she couldn't get a place, and it looked like she would have to live out of her truck. I will not let someone I know live on the street, especially when I have an extra room.
Well, she's still here as a roomate, no sex between us, it's like a brother and sister thing now. Old hurts come up now and then, and we fight like cats and dogs, and work through them.

**The question is;
Would anyone out there do the same for their ex?
Am I a sucker for helping her when she needs it?


Thanks in advance for any critique on my curious situation!

 

[mistressastra]

I lived for a year with my hubby when I found out he had cheated on me. He had no where to go but there was no sex between us. More like a roommate situation. We later made up, took over a year. I'd say if you get along and know you are ex-es, help her out but only for a bit. She needs to let you move on if that's what you want.

 

[cybergirly]

I think it's very nice of you, I have been in a similar situation had an ex-boyfriend with no where to go he stayed with me for awhile. But it didn't work out for long, he'd get jealous if I was dating someone and (I'll admit it) visa-versa but we did end up being friends and I don't think that would have happened had we not lived together as room-mates after we had broken up.

 

[Lost Cause]

With everyone I've split up with I don't keep bad feelings. I know what kind of man I am, and someone choosing another has no bearing on my self-worth. So if I can help them I will.
You're right though, I do want to move on and look for another redhead. I did casually meet one over the weekend, just a chat over coffee. After a while I realized if things developed, it would be hard to date and have to step around my ex at home. I gave her an open ended farewell, regretting not being able to go full speed ahead. (I've got to get laid!)
I still realize that I loved my ex once, even with that gone, I still feel I give her security she can't find right now with another.
Isn't that a bit twisted? Sheesh, can I dig a hole or what?

 

[cybergirly]

If your not comfortable being able to date with the ex at home, its time to give her a time limit..tell her she has a month, or whatever to find someplace else.

 

[T.H. Oughts]

I think it is lovely that you have helped her out by letting her stay. But put a time limit on it, if it will slow your own life down.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Some will say I'm a sucker, nice guys finish last, I'm just being an enabler.

Gee I wonder who it was that said that?

Am I a sucker for helping her when she needs it?

Well, you haven't told the board the whole story now have you? How many times has she gone and come back? She needs to be out on her own, and it is not like she would be out on the street - she can make it on her own. She has a job, has had plenty of jobs.

 

[Cheyenne]

Well, you haven't told the board the whole story now have you? How many times has she gone and come back? She needs to be out on her own, and it is not like she would be out on the street - she can make it on her own. She has a job, has had plenty of jobs.

Ah, the rest of the story.

Sounds like she needs a friendly push from the nest for her own good, as much as for you to be able to move on. The deadline is a good idea. Make it as far out as you feel comfortable with.

 

[Ice Cold]

Not all of my ex-SO's but there are one or two that I would never see put out or down, if there was something I could do to help.

 

[Wiggles]

**The question is;
Would anyone out there do the same for their ex?
Am I a sucker for helping her when she needs it?

I don't know if you're a sucker for doing it, but I would do the same for an ex. Hopefully they would do the same for me.

I suppose it depends on you and your ex, and the situation you're in.