My daughter called me today....

[AreYourLightsOn]

She's spending the weekend with her boyfriend and she took the time to call me and chat for 15 minutes. That is so cool. She's 31, independent as hell, brilliant and drop dead gorgeous. And she loves me and me, her.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Holy crap. And here I was thinking you were about 17 years old. Apologies. I am now going to go rethink all my positions from Iraq to Evolution. Be right back...

 

[AreYourLightsOn]

You fucking crack me up!!

 

[hogjack]

My daughter did not call today...

That one-phone-call-a-day rule in prison reduces communication so much.

The price to buy another call has gone up to three packs of cigs. And they say inflation is under control in the US.

 

[AreYourLightsOn]

Which one of you is in prison

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Speaking of prison...

I ocassionally get letters from various Correctional Facilities. (I'm a Columbian Drug lord). Got one yesterday. I never really read the little note the prison puts on the envelope. They inform you that it's from a jail, and then, at the bottom, it says "Any enclosed money orders should be referred to your local postmaster before cashing".

What is that for, I wonder?

 

[hogjack]

Letters from Correctional Facilities

Speaking of prison...

I ocassionally get letters from various Correctional Facilities. (I'm a Columbian Drug lord). Got one yesterday. I never really read the little note the prison puts on the envelope. They inform you that it's from a jail, and then, at the bottom, it says "Any enclosed money orders should be referred to your local postmaster before cashing".

What is that for, I wonder?

In Columbia the local postmaster gets a cut of the cash. It's something around 15%. They'll try to take 20% but risk being gunned down in a drive-by.

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

Speaking of prison...

I ocassionally get letters from various Correctional Facilities. (I'm a Columbian Drug lord). Got one yesterday. I never really read the little note the prison puts on the envelope. They inform you that it's from a jail, and then, at the bottom, it says "Any enclosed money orders should be referred to your local postmaster before cashing".

What is that for, I wonder?

Can we do business? I'm trying to fund my terrorist organization.

 

[desert spike]

Can we do business? I'm trying to fund my terrorist organization.

You shouldn't say THAT here, Bush's Home Land Security Department could be monitoring all Lit traffic.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

You shouldn't say THAT here, Bush's Home Land Security Department could be monitoring all Lit traffic.

Exactly!!! that's why you should never use the words "bomb", "President", and "kill" in the same sentence.

OOPS

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Lit has been moitored ever since SINthysist/AJ/MarkovCain/AndraJenny/GreenHornet told the FBI all about us. He's going to close us down.

Any day now...

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

But I am a good terrorist. All...I mean God Bless the Infidel George Bush........

Red, white, and blue Burkhas for everywoman, undeserving and evil as they may be.

 

[sunstruck]

But I am a good terrorist. All...I mean God Bless the Infidel George Bush........

Red, white, and blue Burkhas for everywoman, undeserving and evil as they may be.

I just can't seem to decide if you're funny or not.

 

[AreYourLightsOn]

I thought this thread was about....

my daughter.

 

[hogjack]

Ok, your daughter is...

...gorgeous, brilliant, self-confident and living with a fine gentleman. She's a loving, respectful and responsible 31-year-old.

Damn, she's one of the least screwed up souls to appear in Lit, right? You have a reason to swell with pride.

 

[AreYourLightsOn]

Re: Ok, your daughter is...

...gorgeous, brilliant, self-confident and living with a fine gentleman. She's a loving, respectful and responsible 31-year-old.

Damn, she's one of the least screwed up souls to appear in Lit, right? You have a reason to swell with pride.

I always knew I liked you. I am very proud of her and her brother. They are my greatest works of Art. (That's for them, not you).

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Re: I thought this thread was about....

my daughter.

And I thought this was a porn site. Another illusion shattered.

 

[AreYourLightsOn]

Re: Re: I thought this thread was about....

And I thought this was a porn site. Another illusion shattered.

I like your glibness. Ever read The Thin Man by Dashiel Hammett? Nick Charles sort of glib.

 

[Bob_Bytchin]

DCL, you should consider becoming a Buddhist. Buddha claimed that nothing mattered in the world because everything is just an illusion.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

Ever read The Thin Man by Dashiel Hammett?

The important thing is the rhythm! Always have rhythm in your shaking. Now a Manhattan you shake to fox-trot time, a Bronx to two-step time, a dry martini you always shake to waltz time.

 

[Dixon Carter Lee]

DCL, you should consider becoming a Buddhist. Buddha claimed that nothing mattered in the world because everything is just an illusion.

I became a professional magician instead -- I like knowing how the illusions work.

 

[April]

I wish I could find those movies on DVD. What a great bunch of movies.

 

[Tantanah]

She's spending the weekend with her boyfriend and she took the time to call me and chat for 15 minutes. That is so cool. She's 31, independent as hell, brilliant and drop dead gorgeous. And she loves me and me, her.

That is so very special...I haven't been able to talk to my father in 11 yrs.