More on Date Rape

[Silverlily]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: More on Date Rape

He says it wasn't rape because I didn't scream.

My ex said it wasn't rape because I was his wife, like I was property or something.

To me, "date-rape" always implied something worse, a violation of trust from someone who was supposed to care about you.

 

[Allexus_TN]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: More on Date Rape

My ex said it wasn't rape because I was his wife, like I was property or something.

Yeah, I got that line too. Like he's entitled to have sex with me whenever he chooses, regardless of my feelings. He gave me every excuse in the book as to why it wasn't rape. I diffuted every one.

 

[Silverlily]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: More on Date Rape

He gave me every excuse in the book as to why it wasn't rape.

My favorite was "I can't help myself".

 

[Mensa]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: More on Date Rape

My favorite was "I can't help myself".

If I see the bastard, can I kick his ass on your behalf?

 

[Silverlily]

If I see the bastard, can I kick his ass on your behalf?

Now see, a beating only lasts a few days. Trust me, there are better ways to repay such a thing.


<-- for being such a wonderful man

 

[sigh]

is there a worse or better kind of rape?

we're discussing semantics it seems, when the fact is, rape by anyone, friend or stranger or relative or ANYone is an utterly horrible experience

and laurel, while i smiled at your post, i'm not sure i agree with you...at least if someone had pulled out my intestines and set them on fire, i'd be dead by now...as it is, i live with the legacy of rape every day

then again, life has its merits, regardless of its circumstances, so perhaps you're right after all

 

[Impetus]

Thinking...

I wonder why there are so few men on this thread?
I wonder if men can get raped too?
I wonder why it is that there are so many evil raping-men out there, why there are not equivilent women too?
I wonder if women look at me as evil because they've been raped before?
I wonder if I ever was raped, if anyone would take me seriously, or if it would even hurt?
I wonder if rape really *is* the worst crime?
I wonder if rapre really is the worst crime, then is sexuality (or perhaps security) the most important thing?
I wonder if 1 in 4 women really do get raped?
I wonder if even one women was ever really asking for it?
I wonder if I could ever do something like that, even accidentally?
I wonder if there is a male equivalent to a woman crying rape?

I wonder if there are even any answers?

-I

 

[glamorilla]

Re: Thinking...

I wonder why there are so few men on this thread?
I wonder if men can get raped too?
I wonder why it is that there are so many evil raping-men out there, why there are not equivilent women too?
I wonder if women look at me as evil because they've been raped before?
I wonder if I ever was raped, if anyone would take me seriously, or if it would even hurt?
I wonder if rape really *is* the worst crime?
I wonder if rapre really is the worst crime, then is sexuality (or perhaps security) the most important thing?
I wonder if 1 in 4 women really do get raped?
I wonder if even one women was ever really asking for it?
I wonder if I could ever do something like that, even accidentally?
I wonder if there is a male equivalent to a woman crying rape?

I wonder if there are even any answers?

-I

**giggles**

You're sexy.

 

[Impetus]

Re: Re: Thinking...

You're sexy.

Shh...not here.

-I

 

[Guest]

Re: Thinking...

the "oh no, Moon is answering the questions now" reply.

All of the answers to these hypothetical questions are a result of my own personal opinion, and do not in any way reflect the opinion of any owners or participants of this board.

I wonder why there are so few men on this thread?

cause less men get raped.

I wonder if men can get raped too?

yes

I wonder why it is that there are so many evil raping-men out there, why there are not equivilent women too?

there are less women that murder too. It isn't a crime of passion, but of control. Why do men feel they need to control?

I wonder if women look at me as evil because they've been raped before?

No, unless you *feel* bad.

I wonder if I ever was raped, if anyone would take me seriously, or if it would even hurt?

Taking you seriously and hurting about what? I don't understand the question.

I wonder if rape really *is* the worst crime?

You may not be qualified to answer this question.

I wonder if rapre really is the worst crime, then is sexuality (or perhaps security) the most important thing?

The most important thing about what? Could you imagine having your most intimate part of you violated by forces you couldn't control? Are you ticklish? Does the thought of your penis being cut off while you stand by watching in horror do anything to your imagination?

I wonder if 1 in 4 women really do get raped?

Probably higher than that. Most rapes don't get reported.

I wonder if even one women was ever really asking for it?

no

I wonder if I could ever do something like that, even accidentally?

Not accidentally.

I wonder if there is a male equivalent to a woman crying rape?

Probably, but I hate women that *cry* rape almost as much as I hate a rapist.

I wonder if there are even any answers?

Yes, there are. Don't.

 

[Impetus]

Take 2

I wonder if women look at me as evil because they've been raped before?
No, unless you *feel* bad.

I don't follow. If I feel bad, rape victims will see me as evil? That can't be right, what did you mean?

I wonder if I ever was raped, if anyone would take me seriously, or if it would even hurt?
Taking you seriously and hurting about what? I don't understand the question.

If I walked into a police office and told someone I was raped, would I be laughed out? And would it even hurt me to be raped? I'm a guy, maybee it's different for us. We're supposed to be more hard-headed, right?

I wonder if rape really *is* the worst crime?
You may not be qualified to answer this question.

I'm with you on that one.

I wonder if rapre really is the worst crime, then is sexuality (or perhaps security) the most important thing?
The most important thing about what? Could you imagine having your most intimate part of you violated by forces you couldn't control? Are you ticklish? Does the thought of your penis being cut off while you stand by watching in horror do anything to your imagination?

If Rape is the worst crime, then is violating someone's sexuality the worst thing you can do to them? And if so, does that make someone's sexuality the most important thing about them? I don't know if most intimate part of me does reside between my legs. I always thought it might be between my ears, and not the sexual part either. And of course the thought of being castrated is spooky, but is it the *most* spooky?

I wonder if 1 in 4 women really do get raped?
Probably higher than that. Most rapes don't get reported.

I tend to be wary of statistics. They can be fudged far to easily. Perhaps this one wasn't.

I wonder if even one women was ever really asking for it?
no

Took me a while to figure this one out. If she was raped, then by definition she wasn't.

I like answering, sometimes. Makes me certain, or at least moreso.

-I

 

[Guest]

 

[MechaBlade]

I am amazed that the husband rapist event occurs often, too. I had heard of it, but didn't think it was a common event.

God, people make me sick sometimes. I desperately want sex sometimes, and I am turned on by (Fictional) rape stories, but the idea that real people do this often makes me feel shocked and confused. When I say confused, I mean, why do people rape and cross that line? and other such questions.

Just thinking out loud.

 

[Nomad4112000]

My 2 bits on this subject

Date Rape:

1st I would like to apologize I’m going to climb on my soapbox for a minute. The term Date Rape was created but the Political Correct group that uses words to pretty up horrific descriptions so they do not sound so bad. I feel it is so some day they expect people to say “WOW that sounds like it would be great to be that situation” instead of calling the situation appalling as it should be. You are correct rape is rape. When a person takes sexual advantage of another person when they say NO is rape. To this date people who have committed rape have NEVER been cured. Not through drugs, therapy or castration yet the courts still try to cure them of this disease. This is a power trip they are on and the are mentally sick (Emotional Challenged for you PC Fucks). When an animal kills they are put down, when they are diseased they are put down. When a human kills with no remorse they lock then in a cage and give them 3 square meals, cable, and a college education. Those convicted of rape are put into a mental instute and psychoanalyzed.

I cost the tax payers about $100,000 per prisoner where they will spend the rest of their lives with no chance of ever leaving. This is however not true with rapist they will be let out before long. Those who have been through the therapy have still committed violent crimes. As I see it call a mad dog a mad dog. It cost $100,000 per prisoner and a bullet is $.50. I flip for the 2 bits.

 

[SilverVeil]

After I was raped, I signed up for martial arts self defense. One night we were sitting around after class talking over coffee and one woman asked how many of the women in the class had ever been raped and if so why did they not struggle and run away. She actually had the balls to say " A woman can run faster with her skirt up than a man can with his pants down " .

I told her that the man who attacked me had a knife at my throat and had actually broke the skin and I was bleeding from it.

She replied it was probably a scare tactic and I let him win.

I told her as far as I was concerned .... I knew I could survive the rape. I was not willing to bet I could survive murder.


To this day, I still take this stand on this issue. What was taken from me was sex. And only sex. Not my life. I did not freely give it away. However else it affected me ... I still have my life.

 

[DRxBlue]

One man's opinion

To me, "date-rape" always implied something worse, a violation of trust from someone who was supposed to care about you.

Here KittenEyes comes the closest to my feeling on the subject of "Date Rape". i think it's bad enough when a rapist (i don't even want to call such a creature a person) attacks a stranger; i can't even come close to imagining why a rapist would need to cause such fear & pain.

But the aspect of betrayal added to "Date Rape" seems to me to be an even worse crime. i don't believe rape has anything to do with sexual needs. It seems more predicated on a desire to hurt, control, and frighten.

It really makes me ill, and ashamed for the human race.

Emerald_eyed, it seems to me that "Husband Rape" (language really fails us all here) is even worse because the level of betrayal is even greater. Marriage is a bond which should be forged from trust and faith, far moreso than dating.

When one breaks that bond so blatantly, especially with your children within earshot---oooo i wish there were a way to escalate punishment to a level that would fit the crime.

But--i'm not a judge. i'm not really a doctor either. i wish i were, and that i could prescribe something that would heal such wounds.

i'm just a dope about stuff like this, but my heart really breaks for those of you who have suffered. i've spent enough years suffering for different reasons, that i think my prayers for your healing might have some impact.The Creator seems to be impressed by people who suffer.


Blue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
P.S. Starfish, i'm with kiwiwolf. i wish i could sic you on some people i know. What an arsenal!

P.P.S. Silverveil, luv. i can't BELIEVE the stupidity and insensitivity of that BITCH in your self-defense class. i think you put it well saying she had the "balls" to be so volubly, offensivly idiotic. It's a trait more usually reserved for men. (if i DO say so myself) Too bad you didn't have Starfish there.

P.P.P.S. Laurel Kitty Mama...you have a sick and twisted mind--GOD! i love that in a woman!

 

[Allexus_TN]

A couple of comments

First, to Impetus. I personally don't look down on men in general because I was raped. Many people would think that being raped so brutally at knife point at age 14, when I was virgin and naive in matters sexual, that I would have turned into a man hater. I did not. Perhaps it helped that all other males in my life were so loving towards me. I had a wonderful father, two wonderful grandfathers (I lost one to a heart attack a week after my rape), a good uncle, and numerous family friends. Somehow I think this taught me that no all men are "bad." Even though I felt unable to report my rape, I still realized that the rapist was a "bad man" not all men. It did and has created some trust issues with men, but over time that trust comes around for me.

And now to Silver Veil. I can't believe someone, regardless of sex, would tell you that you let the rapist win. You and I did the right thing with knives held to our throat. You can stay alive after being raped, but the odds of survival after being stabbed or having your throat slit aren't that great. Perhaps she would have spoken differently if she had been given the choice we had been given.

 

[Ms_Lilith]

raped by a boyfriend

Rape is rape is rape... but like others have mentioned before me, daterape refers to a rape done by someone you were seeing, someone you were happy to be with, in a romantic situation. Maybe you'd made it clear that you didn't want to have sex. Maybe you have a policy not to have sex when you're drunk. Whatever.. either way, if he goes ahead and ploughs away, it's rape and daterape. The distinction lies in the occurances when a guy jumps out of the bushes and rapes a woman (for example), vs the date doing the crime.
I was dateraped by a boyfriend. Not fun. And I do call it daterape.. because I had trusted him, I had felt secure with him, and he'd betrayed that trust.