morals??? would you compromise?

[dolf]

i've been following the thread on voting ("subs...") and i'm curious {not trying to judge, just curious} how far some pyl would go in following their PYL.

would you be willing to compromise on your moral beliefs?

personally, i wouldn't. i would never enter into something that i felt was wrong just because another wanted me to. i would always voice my concerns and if i felt strongly enough i'd try to stop it.
eg....i'm the sort of person who goes back into a shop if i've been given too much change, i would never go along with anything i saw as theft. (yes, i know a silly example but you get my drift) this is very different to giving in to superior reasoning.
xx

 

[graceanne]

I wouldn't even go into a relationship with someone who didn't have the same morals and beliefs as me.

 

[dolf]

I wouldn't even go into a relationship with someone who didn't have the same morals and beliefs as me.

i like that answer!
but surely there are grey areas?places where you don't quite see eye to eye?
nobody sees the world exactly the same way as anyone else....
xx

 

[graceanne]

i like that answer!
but surely there are grey areas?places where you don't quite see eye to eye?
nobody sees the world exactly the same way as anyone else....
xx

Well, their are things, but they aren't important things. Like whether I should let the kids run naked all the time. I was raised by hippies, I think child nudity is fine, and their's nothing as beautiful as a naked baby butt. He was raised in a southern baptist church. But religiously, morally, etc, we totally agree. We always have, it's one of the reasons we got married.

 

[sunfox]

Quite simply, no.

I will not compromise on the things that make me who I am.. I will not become someone that disgusts me to be.

He would never ask it of me.. but if he did ask/tell me to do something I felt was morally repugnant, I would refuse.

 

[Desdemona]

I have to be true to myself and my beliefs. If I violate that, then my submission is worthless because I have little worth.

 

[Shadowsdream]

i like that answer!
but surely there are grey areas?places where you don't quite see eye to eye?
nobody sees the world exactly the same way as anyone else....
xx

What would be your grey areas dolf?

 

[snowy ciara]

I wouldn't compromise my morals, because I have a feeling that I'd never hook up with anyone who was that different than me. It'd be too hard, otherwise. I know that everyone ays opposites attract, and sometimes they do; but that seems to be personality traits and stuff. When it comes to general morality, folks usually align.

 

[graceanne]

I wouldn't compromise my morals, because I have a feeling that I'd never hook up with anyone who was that different than me. It'd be too hard, otherwise. I know that everyone ays opposites attract, and sometimes they do; but that seems to be personality traits and stuff. When it comes to general morality, folks usually align.

Yeah, usually. Of course their are always exceptions to the rule. Me and Kenny are the 'oposites attract type people'. On the surface we have nothing in common. He's an outdoorsy person, I'm not; I love to read, he prefers tv, etc. But we're the same where it's important, and we're willing to compromise on the other parts.

 

[shy slave]

My own morals can be in the grey areas of life.

So some of them I have and would compromise.

I was brought up a strict Roman Catholic, thisgave me a foundation set of morals & values for leading my life.

If I had stayed within those morals, I would not have had my first child (sex before marriage), nor would I have had the career i currently have (I had to divorce before I could embark on a career), I would not be looking to live in this lifestyle with Him.

I am not knocking Catholic morals and values; I am saying that for me to expand my horizons and discover who I am I needed to slowly change my belief system, part of which was the orginal moral values I had.

I cannot say if I would compromise any of my current morals if He deemed it appropriate, but I would want to discuss with Him why He felt it appropriate for me to do so.

If His arguement were valid then I would start to make changes, if He is the person I think He is; He would not expect an overnight, instant change.

Like the tortoise and the hare slow progress can be the longer lasting one.

Actually I think He probably has much more set, black & white morals than I, which is not to say He would not want a more relaxed attitude to some issues; but He may want a more moralistic view instead.

I believe if he wanted changes He would give reasons why these would be of benefit and there would a settling down period to allow me to come to terms with the changes and start to adot a different mindset to the issue at hand.

I hope this makes sense, basically if there were reason to then some of my moral values could be altered if he deemed it appropriate

 

[TigerClaw]

No

I was with one person who had what turned out to be very different morals. I would not enter a relationship like that again. She felt the need to feed her desires behind my back that I could not agree with or share.

 

[TigerClaw]

Are you or were you Catholic?

I am taking this as your distancing yourself from values in the Catholic Church.

Funny, I turned more to it from my experience. Divorce is ok under certain conditions and there is a belief that where the church does not sanction it and you have given it careful consideration and thought, it may very well be the right thing to do even if the "church" says no.

I am no saint. I am learning things about relationships due to my belief that when I was younger did not truly believe or follow.

I believe having similar morals is very important in a relationship. Over time morals do change for a couple but with communication and the willingness to make it work hopefully the two will grow together.

My own morals can be in the grey areas of life.

So some of them I have and would compromise.

I was brought up a strict Roman Catholic, thisgave me a foundation set of morals & values for leading my life.

If I had stayed within those morals, I would not have had my first child (sex before marriage),
People make mistakes, are tempted, have to learn. Would you give your child up for that mistake? I am betting you would not.


nor would I have had the career i currently have (I had to divorce before I could embark on a career),
If you gave it careful consideration and know it was the right thing to do then you did what was right

I would not be looking to live in this lifestyle with Him.
I completely disagree with this whether or not I agree with certain details. D/s has nothing to do with Good or Bad in general. Certain acts yes, but that is for you and your partner to decide whether you will do it. I will not judge. I just will not participate.


I am not knocking Catholic morals and values; I am saying that for me to expand my horizons and discover who I am I needed to slowly change my belief system, part of which was the orginal moral values I had.

I cannot say if I would compromise any of my current morals if He deemed it appropriate, but I would want to discuss with Him why He felt it appropriate for me to do so.

If His arguement were valid then I would start to make changes, if He is the person I think He is; He would not expect an overnight, instant change.

Like the tortoise and the hare slow progress can be the longer lasting one.

Actually I think He probably has much more set, black & white morals than I, which is not to say He would not want a more relaxed attitude to some issues; but He may want a more moralistic view instead.

I believe if he wanted changes He would give reasons why these would be of benefit and there would a settling down period to allow me to come to terms with the changes and start to adot a different mindset to the issue at hand.

I hope this makes sense, basically if there were reason to then some of my moral values could be altered if he deemed it appropriate

As for nudity this has been a personal issue for me. I beleive there is nothing wrong with the human body. I believe in artistic nude pictures. I do believe some pics that would be considered porn are artisitc but not all porn is art. I believe a woman has the right to breast feed in public. I always questioned why women can not go topless and men can. Boobs are not X-rated.

I talked to one woman who believed in nudity in the home with the kids. I questioned that. I would not feel comfortable with it. Yet, why do I believe a Nudist camp is ok? I never knew I had this contradiction until this last year. Is nudity sinful? No it is not. Yet, you will find plenty of ppl that will tell you it is. Who is right? I believe I am. We will not know until the day we die. Guess what we will be forgiven for our mistakes. Am I going to Hell because I find nothing wrong with nudity?

 

[Kajira Callista]

dont we have one of these threads around here? i recall it being a really good one too?

 

[graceanne]

Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

I am taking this as your distancing yourself from values in the Catholic Church.

Funny, I turned more to it from my experience. Divorce is ok under certain conditions and there is a belief that where the church does not sanction it and you have given it careful consideration and thought, it may very well be the right thing to do even if the "church" says no.

I am no saint. I am learning things about relationships due to my belief that when I was younger did not truly believe or follow.

I believe having similar morals is very important in a relationship. Over time morals do change for a couple but with communication and the willingness to make it work hopefully the two will grow together.






As for nudity this has been a personal issue for me. I beleive there is nothing wrong with the human body. I believe in artistic nude pictures. I do believe some pics that would be considered porn are artisitc but not all porn is art. I believe a woman has the right to breast feed in public. I always questioned why women can not go topless and men can. Boobs are not X-rated.

I talked to one woman who believed in nudity in the home with the kids. I questioned that. I would not feel comfortable with it. Yet, why do I believe a Nudist camp is ok? I never knew I had this contradiction until this last year. Is nudity sinful? No it is not. Yet, you will find plenty of ppl that will tell you it is. Who is right? I believe I am. We will not know until the day we die. Guess what we will be forgiven for our mistakes. Am I going to Hell because I find nothing wrong with nudity?

Actually I found a really cool web site on whether nudity is a sin or not, and why people think it is. (It has to do with our puritan beginnings). I read somewhere that countries where nudity is more the norm (like France) have a much lower rate of violent sex crimes. The reason they believe this to be true is that the naked body is not taboo, and therefor there is less coveting. *shrugs*

And my personal belief is that if someone looks at a naked child , or a mother nursing, and thinks pornography, then they're the sick ones, not the child or the mother. Both, a naked child, and a woman nursing are beautiful.

http://www.nudistweb.net/~wholesome/modest.html

 

[shy slave]

Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

I am taking this as your distancing yourself from values in the Catholic Church.

Funny, I turned more to it from my experience. Divorce is ok under certain conditions and there is a belief that where the church does not sanction it and you have given it careful consideration and thought, it may very well be the right thing to do even if the "church" says no.

I am no saint. I am learning things about relationships due to my belief that when I was younger did not truly believe or follow.

I believe having similar morals is very important in a relationship. Over time morals do change for a couple but with communication and the willingness to make it work hopefully the two will grow together.

As for nudity this has been a personal issue for me. I beleive there is nothing wrong with the human body. I believe in artistic nude pictures. I do believe some pics that would be considered porn are artisitc but not all porn is art. I believe a woman has the right to breast feed in public. I always questioned why women can not go topless and men can. Boobs are not X-rated.

I talked to one woman who believed in nudity in the home with the kids. I questioned that. I would not feel comfortable with it. Yet, why do I believe a Nudist camp is ok? I never knew I had this contradiction until this last year. Is nudity sinful? No it is not. Yet, you will find plenty of ppl that will tell you it is. Who is right? I believe I am. We will not know until the day we die. Guess what we will be forgiven for our mistakes. Am I going to Hell because I find nothing wrong with nudity?

Not distancing myself from all the morals I was given by the RC church but I felt it was too difficlut to live within the constraints.

That said no-ones morals and values comes from one part of their life.
The environmental conditioning I grew up with, which was completly sepreate from the RC values, also had an impact on the foundation of values I had/have.

I prefer to think I used the RC values as a springboard to allow me to look at, explore and make decisions about my future morals from a secure understanding of what is right and wring.

I know many of the RC teachings could be viewed as ambigueous (throwing 'Vatican 2 into the pot and give it a stir), but not all fall into that catagory.

If you come from a solid foundation of values that holds up (in your opinion) under scrutiny then you make informed choices about changes you could make.

If He asked me to kill, steal or harm another that would fall into hard limits that are supported by long-standing morals and values.
If He asked to enter another chucrh and partake in that religious service (for example take Holy Communican in a non-RC but Christian church) I would find it difficult. If He explained His reasons for asking and they seemed reasonable then I would agree, if His reasoning was of the 'because i sad so' variety I could put up a reasonable counter-discussion.

My current values/morals beliefs are a mix of parental upbringing, the RC church, the Spiritualist church, life experiences and other things I have yet to realise have had an influence on me.

So some of my morals are part of hard limits, some would cause me diffiuclty but are a moveable form.

Everyone has different morals and values, snowy said she would 'never hook up with anyone that different' but some people do just that.

Would you rather a good, safe vanilla person or a person who appears to have a dark side and induges in things you would never normally do. This 'dark side' could be quite mild for example drinks in pubs after hours, or it could be quite extreme for example drinking chickens blood during a full moon.

Morals a re subjective and I know my subjectivity has changed over the years.

I guess I am a partial Catholic who practices both Spirtualism and D/s

Wonder what God will say when I get there or should that if I get there lol.

As an add-on would I give up my eldest child for that mistake? your right my answer is no but then he does make a great cup of tea; my second child? Ummmm can I think about it.

Before anyone shoots its a JOKE ~ honest!

Thanks TigerClaw for making me think

KC wheres the other thread, any chance we can resurrect it?

 

[Kajira Callista]

im looking but lit is being pissy and i cant remember the name of the thread...where is AA when you need him? He is good at finding stuff

 

[TigerClaw]

Re: Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

Oh this is probably not the thread to be talking about this but here goes........

Not distancing myself from all the morals I was given by the RC church but I felt it was too difficlut to live within the constraints.

That said no-ones morals and values comes from one part of their life.
The environmental conditioning I grew up with, which was completly sepreate from the RC values, also had an impact on the foundation of values I had/have.

I prefer to think I used the RC values as a springboard to allow me to look at, explore and make decisions about my future morals from a secure understanding of what is right and wring.

I know many of the RC teachings could be viewed as ambigueous (throwing 'Vatican 2 into the pot and give it a stir), but not all fall into that catagory.

If you come from a solid foundation of values that holds up (in your opinion) under scrutiny then you make informed choices about changes you could make.
Yes, all our views are modified, swayed by our environment, experiences etc. There are a lot of things that are expected conformity in any religion. It is the acceptance that these rules are put in place to teach us like children to do or not to do something. It does not mean that sex before marrage is WRONG but it is a rule to protect us from being hurt. The hurt can out weigh the 99 times it was right.

If He asked me to kill, steal or harm another that would fall into hard limits that are supported by long-standing morals and values.
If He asked to enter another chucrh and partake in that religious service (for example take Holy Communican in a non-RC but Christian church) I would find it difficult. If He explained His reasons for asking and they seemed reasonable then I would agree, if His reasoning was of the 'because i sad so' variety I could put up a reasonable counter-discussion. [/B]My cousins always looked at us as the Evil Ones because we were not of their religion. They were doing evil back then. They hated any religious time the family had when it involved our side of the family. We willingly went to there church. You can show a sign of respect, understanding and kindness with out believing or breaking the rules of your religion. We drew the line at Holy Communion. We would kneel, stand, sit, they did not in each others churches.

My current values/morals beliefs are a mix of parental upbringing, the RC church, the Spiritualist church, life experiences and other things I have yet to realise have had an influence on me.

So some of my morals are part of hard limits, some would cause me diffiuclty but are a moveable form.yes. It is a learning experience. Everything testing your beliefs, redefining beliefs, supporting beliefts.

Everyone has different morals and values, snowy said she would 'never hook up with anyone that different' but some people do just that.I can see this also. It can be very thought provoking. I would imagine there has to be great understanding of each other and communication.

Would you rather a good, safe vanilla person or a person who appears to have a dark side and induges in things you would never normally do. This 'dark side' could be quite mild for example drinks in pubs after hours, or it could be quite extreme for example drinking chickens blood during a full moon.The dark side is always attractive. Ah, but to you my drinking is the dark side. I say absolutely not. I am of Italian Norwegian decent. Bad mix in terms of alcohol. The norsk are wrong with Alcohol being evil. What a contrast. The belief of alcohol is the dark side is coming from not understanding.

Morals a re subjective and I know my subjectivity has changed over the years.

I guess I am a partial Catholic who practices both Spirtualism and D/s

Wonder what God will say when I get there or should that if I get there lol.

As an add-on would I give up my eldest child for that mistake? your right my answer is no but then he does make a great cup of tea; my second child? Ummmm can I think about it.
LOL. Think of the joy he has brought to you and others. He has and will make mistakes. We all have and will. The action that brought him into this world may be condemned by some. But what has it taught you? What opportunity has it given him? What joy has it brought to others who know him?

Before anyone shoots its a JOKE ~ honest!

Thanks TigerClaw for making me think

KC wheres the other thread, any chance we can resurrect it?

 

[TigerClaw]

Re: Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

I didnt know that about the French. It sound right though. Italy for the longest time (I dont know if it is still true) had the lowest alcoholism rate in the world for sometime. It makes sense. Italy and the surrounding countries grew up with alcohol.

Actually I found a really cool web site on whether nudity is a sin or not, and why people think it is. (It has to do with our puritan beginnings). I read somewhere that countries where nudity is more the norm (like France) have a much lower rate of violent sex crimes. The reason they believe this to be true is that the naked body is not taboo, and therefor there is less coveting. *shrugs*

And my personal belief is that if someone looks at a naked child , or a mother nursing, and thinks pornography, then they're the sick ones, not the child or the mother. Both, a naked child, and a woman nursing are beautiful.
I absolutely agree with this. My only reservation though is do I want my woman to express her right to breast feed in public and set some nut off on her? We are not living in the 60's or 70's anymore.

http://www.nudistweb.net/~wholesome/modest.html

 

[Kajira Callista]

this one ended up to be a morals discussion https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=224645
another https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=229376
another https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=216573
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=197195
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=113381
https://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=227468

i give up...but at least you have some reading to occupy until i find the thread i was looking for in the first place

 

[sunfox]

Re: Re: Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

I absolutely agree with this. My only reservation though is do I want my woman to express her right to breast feed in public and set some nut off on her? We are not living in the 60's or 70's anymore.

*chuckles* While I agree that it can be annoying to have someone pitch a fit because you're breastfeeding, I'll just comment from the pov of a woman who breastfed and say that when my daughter wanted to eat, I fed her. I was polite, and covered her with a blanket.. but I never had any trouble with anyone. Some guys leering, but that's it.

It honestly didn't matter to me if it bothered someone or not.. the fact that she was hungry was what mattered. I won't let my daughter go hungry just so I don't offend someone's delicate sensibilities.

 

[Netzach]

can't imagine asking someone to do something really strongly against their grain moral or otherwise. Just sets me up for disappointment and them up for resentment, what would be the point there?

 

[graceanne]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

*chuckles* While I agree that it can be annoying to have someone pitch a fit because you're breastfeeding, I'll just comment from the pov of a woman who breastfed and say that when my daughter wanted to eat, I fed her. I was polite, and covered her with a blanket.. but I never had any trouble with anyone. Some guys leering, but that's it.

It honestly didn't matter to me if it bothered someone or not.. the fact that she was hungry was what mattered. I won't let my daughter go hungry just so I don't offend someone's delicate sensibilities.

A little hijack, but my children wouldn't nurse under a blanket. The second I'd cover them they'd detach from my breast and start pushing at the blanket. K didn't want me nursing in public, so normally I would be sent to some room where no one was. In effect I was banished. Why? Because I wanted my children to be breast fed. Used to irritate the heck out of me. I don't care of nursing bugs other people. If they don't like it they can look, and the perves just get dirty looks from me, and turn away.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[TigerClaw]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Are you or were you Catholic?

Isnt that what is most important. The simple things in life. Yes, I agree if my child was hungry and she had no problem with it I would agree.

I am not too worried about someone being offended but of someone getting the wrong idea. But I am probably being paranoid.

I am very happy to hear so much positive feedback from the women who have breast fed.

It honestly didn't matter to me if it bothered someone or not.. the fact that she was hungry was what mattered. I won't let my daughter go hungry just so I don't offend someone's delicate sensibilities.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****