Mid-life for women

[damppanties]

Got this in an email from a woman who's middle-aged, but you could never tell unless she told you.

Made me laugh.

* * * * *

I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a
great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how great
menopause will be... Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts of my own
and would like to share them with you. Whether you are pushing 40, 50,
60 (or maybe even just pushing your luck) you'll probably relate.

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives
us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

In mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wing spans. We are
no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can
see your rear without turning around.

Mid-life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the
only time someone will ask you to appear topless.

Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top
and scream, "Listen honey, even the Roman empire fell and those will too."

Mid-life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're
sitting on our biggest ones.

Mid-life is when you look at your-know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager
and think: "For this I have stretch marks?"

In mid-life your memory starts to go. In fact the only thing we can
retain is water.

Mid-life means that your Body By Jake now includes Legs By Rand McNally
-- more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of Wisconsin.

Mid-life means that you become more reflective...You start pondering the
"big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy choice
ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?

But mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important.

We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins double, but our loved
ones make the journey worthwhile. Would any of you trade the knowledge
that you have now, for the body you had way back when? Maybe our bodies
simply have to expand to hold all the wisdom and love we've acquired.
That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it!

* * * * *

I think all the AH women should mail this person naked pics.

 

[Black Tulip]

Evil, but I like it.

 

[Guest]

Not laughing, not even smiling.

Perdita

 

[impressive]

Would any of you trade the knowledge that you have now, for the body you had way back when?

No WAY!

 

[Stella_Omega]

Would any of you trade the knowledge
that you have now, for the body you had way back when?

Can I think about this and get back to you on it later?

(by the way, damppanties, thank you for the lovely PC

 

[Norajane]

I think I said something in another thread about how older women are considered 'old' in American society.

It's such a shame our culture glorifies youth so much, and that we don't celebrate and revere age, wisdom, experience and character like other cultures do around the world.

 

[rgraham666]

If I can inject my POV?

I much prefer women my own age to younger women.

Most of the time I watch the younger women and wonder "Why would I be interested in children?"

The women on the AH are an exception, but in the real world, I generally walk right past the girls. Unless they have clear indications of personality and intelligence.

 

[MissBri]

 

[SeaCat]

It's funny, (and yes this is related.) This afternoon I saw a pic. series about a MILF. She was all of 26. What the hell people, a woman of 26 is considered Mature now?

My wife is 36. She is just about as young as I would go. (There are a few exceptions to this, but they are rare and know who they are.) The women I am attracted to have been around the block a time or two. They know what life is all about. They don't live in a fantasy land of white knights and virgin births, they live in a land of dented armor and stolen kisses. They know that life isn't a vacation, rather it is a sometimes drab and painful existance that is lightened by the love of another.

Why would I look at a teenie bopper who thinks otherwise?

Cat

 

[rgraham666]

Just so, Cat, just so.

 

[Black Tulip]

Cat, Rob,

The men I'm meeting - not dating wise - all have the same view.
Which makes me very happy.

By the way, my body looks a lot better now that I stopped following crazy diets to achieve a ridiculous weight that does not match my build or my personality.

http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/snowman/cool.gif

 

[alice_underneath]

Got this in an email from a woman who's middle-aged, but you could never tell unless she told you.

Made me laugh.

If your profile is correct, you are a female between the ages of 23 & 26. Wait 20 years, then come on back and tell us if you're still laughing.

And in the meantime, you might want to pause before posting trash like this, to consider how it might be received by others in the room.

I think all the AH women should mail this person naked pics.

No thanks. Privacy and modesty issues aside, I try to avoid doing things for the benefit of those whose judgment I don't respect.

I tell you what, though. For the benefit of SeaCat and rgraham666, I'll offer this link to a photo of a naked older woman:

https://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=15857918&postcount=1110

I think she's gorgeous.

Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can see your rear without turning around.

To the author of this email, I would say: Speak for yourself.

If you don't like what you see when you look in the mirror, lay off the cookie dough ice cream and hop on a treadmill once in a while. Don't try to blame age for all of the flaws in your physique, because some of them resulted from conscious choices that you've made in the past and are still making, every single day.

Alice

 

[NoJo]

My 48-year-old wife cried and cried and cried all day yesterday. It's hormones, but it's still really upsetting to see, and of course I always think it's my fault.

 

[Guest]

My 48-year-old wife cried and cried and cried all day yesterday. It's hormones, but it's still really upsetting to see, and of course I always think it's my fault.

If she isn't blaming you, Joe, then don't blame yourself.

 

[English Lady]

My 48-year-old wife cried and cried and cried all day yesterday. It's hormones, but it's still really upsetting to see, and of course I always think it's my fault.

*hugs* It's so difficult to see someone you love crying and not being able to do anything about it. I'm sure just the fact that you're there and want to help is more soothing than you can possibly imagine

 

[damppanties]

If your profile is correct, you are a female between the ages of 23 & 26. Wait 20 years, then come on back and tell us if you're still laughing.

And in the meantime, you might want to pause before posting trash like this, to consider how it might be received by others in the room.

No thanks. Privacy and modesty issues aside, I try to avoid doing things for the benefit of those whose judgment I don't respect.

Yes, the profile is correct and I don't need to wait 20 years. I'm already there body-wise.

What bit exactly in the posted 'trash' makes you think it's a judgement? It is purely humor, IMO. Of course, you may have a different way of looking at it and I'm sorry if it offended you. It wasn't intended in that way.

 

[Pure]

yes

alice below said,

To the author of this email, I would say: Speak for yourself.

If you don't like what you see when you look in the mirror, lay off the cookie dough ice cream and hop on a treadmill once in a while. Don't try to blame age for all of the flaws in your physique, because some of them resulted from conscious choices that you've made in the past and are still making, every single day.

let's keep in mind that damppanties is NOT the author here (i.e., "the author of this email"), simply the poster. of course alice was aware of this.

we should not assume she endorses every statement, particularly in a piece that's attempting humorous exaggeration.

having said that, alice's statement above--just by itseslf-- sounds like good advice, indeed for both genders.

to me, the biggest change in the last 20 years is the appearance of 40-50+ year old women. let's take Gloria Steinem as an example. where weight gain is avoided and fitness achieved they look fine. (i suppose it's 'unfair' that the same pressure is not on men, but that's our society.)

too, i notice it's a class thing (like smoking). the overweight 40 yr old is morely likely working class; the trim 40 year old is more likely a yuppie, though there are many exceptions.

interesting, but the last romantic comedy I saw, Diane Lane played the lead, in "Must love dogs", and she's clearly about 40 and extremely hot.
indeed part of the comedy is about whether the word 'voluptuous' applies.

http://www.superiorpics.com/diane_lane/pictures/diane_sd50202683_picture.html

http://www.superiorpics.com/diane_lane/pictures/5909_lane_d88496668_picture.html

 

[zeb1094]

It's funny, (and yes this is related.) This afternoon I saw a pic. series about a MILF. She was all of 26. What the hell people, a woman of 26 is considered Mature now?
Cat

I would agree with you Cat, 26 is not Mature. But, MILF is not about maturity. Mothers I'd Like to Fuck is about moms, you(well not you per say) can be a MILF when your 18, at least on the internet.

 

[Liar]

Most of the time I watch the younger women and wonder "Why would I be interested in children?"

The women on the AH are an exception, but in the real world, I generally walk right past the girls. Unless they have clear indications of personality and intelligence.

In the real world, as in the online world, I always walk right past anybody, from teen to great-granny, unless they have clear indications of personality and intelligence.

There seems to be a little less of that among the young, but age is no guarantee for wisdom either. One of the most intelligent, level headed and mentally mature persons I know turns 21 on Wednesday. I'm making the cake.

 

[alice_underneath]

Yes, the profile is correct and I don't need to wait 20 years. I'm already there body-wise.

What bit exactly in the posted 'trash' makes you think it's a judgement? It is purely humor, IMO. Of course, you may have a different way of looking at it and I'm sorry if it offended you. It wasn't intended in that way.

Damppanties,

You put up this piece with a big grin next to the title line. Your summary opinion, from the opening post:

Made me laugh.

You did not say something like: "This made me laugh, because I already have flabby arms and a big ass and I'm only 25."

Neither did you say something like: "I think this piece is wonderful, because the conclusion highlights what's really important in life (wisdom, love,etc.)."

The inescapable conclusion is that you, a 25-year-old female, posted this piece to laugh at older women and invite others to join you in doing so. The fact that you are unable to understand why this might be considered offensive by women such as me (45), demonstrates at least a temporary lack of judgment on your part.

To help you understand my point, I will ask a rhetorical question.

Would you consider it acceptable for a slender woman to start a thread with a big grin and a "Made me laugh" and an allegedly humorous piece containing exaggerated, pejorative generalizations about the bodies of big, beautiful women?

I accept your apology. Thank you for offering it.

Alice

P.S. to Pure: Thank you.

 

[Guest]

Got this in an email from a woman who's middle-aged, but you could never tell unless she told you.

Made me laugh.

* * * * *

I've seen two shows lately that went on and on about how mid-life is a
great time for women. Just last week Oprah had a whole show on how great
menopause will be... Puhleeeeeeeze! I've had a few thoughts of my own
and would like to share them with you. Whether you are pushing 40, 50,
60 (or maybe even just pushing your luck) you'll probably relate.

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives
us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

In mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wing spans. We are
no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can
see your rear without turning around.

Mid-life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the
only time someone will ask you to appear topless.

Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top
and scream, "Listen honey, even the Roman empire fell and those will too."

Mid-life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we're
sitting on our biggest ones.

Mid-life is when you look at your-know-it-all, beeper-wearing teenager
and think: "For this I have stretch marks?"

In mid-life your memory starts to go. In fact the only thing we can
retain is water.

Mid-life means that your Body By Jake now includes Legs By Rand McNally
-- more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of Wisconsin.

Mid-life means that you become more reflective...You start pondering the
"big" questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much Healthy choice
ice cream can I eat before it's no longer a healthy choice?

But mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important.

We realize that breasts sag, hips expand and chins double, but our loved
ones make the journey worthwhile. Would any of you trade the knowledge
that you have now, for the body you had way back when? Maybe our bodies
simply have to expand to hold all the wisdom and love we've acquired.
That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it!

* * * * *

I think all the AH women should mail this person naked pics.

Mine is on the way, want to pass it on for me...lol. My mom talks about that all the time, she said she hasn't had to shave her legs in years...

 

[Black Tulip]

Girls,

Since I was the first to react ...

I'm over 50, well into mid-life and it made me laugh because I think it was funny.
I fight against the flabby arms, never had an ass to speak of anyway but do my damnedest (?) to keep the moustache under control.

Don't you ever laugh at yourself?

http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/snowman/laugh.gif

 

[alice_underneath]

Don't you ever laugh at yourself?

Of course. All the time.

But there is a difference between laughing at yourself, and laughing at other people.

That's my point.

Alice

 

[impressive]

Of course. All the time.

But there is a difference between laughing at yourself, and laughing at other people.

That's my point.

Alice

Those of us who know dear dampy know that she wouldn't do that.

Okay ... group hug!

 

[alice_underneath]

Those of us who know dear dampy know that she wouldn't do that.

I guess I misjudged the grin and the "Made me laugh" comment.

Okay ... group hug!

Sincere thanks to you, Impressive, for trying to lighten the mood here.

I am off for the rest of the weekend.

Best wishes to all,

Alice