MathGirl for Governor of California

[oggbashan]

This is a shameless attempt to influence the USA. The US is accused of influencing everyone else so we strike back at the former colony.

MathGirl can add up. Yay!

That gives her better qualifications to deal with the fiscal problems of the great state of California than most of the other potential candidates.

MathGirl looks great in a pink bikini. The other candidates?

MathGirl can write. Can the others?

MathGirl can hold her own in debate with the other members of the Author's Hangout. Should be good practice for when she's in office.

MathGirl knows how to use a computer so she could deal with the problems of Silicon Valley.

Compare MathGirl's qualifications with the current Governor and the possible candidates and there is no contest. MathGirl just has to have three thousand and five hundred dollars to be a candidate. I'm willing to donate a dollar to the campaign funds.

Go for it, MathGirl.

Og

 

[alltherage]

You must really hate math girl to want to saddle her with that mess. Arnold the Nazi is going to take ober and make zee trains run on time. Aint ya heard.

 

[MathGirl]

Good grief!

Dear Og,
What have you got against me? Anyway, I hear Gray Davis looks great in a pink Speedo. Cringe

Today starts the new fiscal year, there's no budget, and that just means things are normal. We never have a budget on time.

There's really no hope for the state as long as So. Calif controls things. The state should be sawed in half at Bakersfield, and let the sp... bea.. those people go their own way.

As William Tecumseh Sherman once said, "If nominated I will not run. If elected I will not serve." Besides, I'm not old enough.
MG
Ps. I'll take the dollar, though.

 

[Guest]

 

[MathGirl]

Nolo contendre

The visual...Awnold and four-foot something, 85 lb. MathGirl standing on the same stage for a debate

I'd dazzle the oaf with my footwork.
MG
Ps. Sadly, Arnie as governor isn't totally impossible. Remember, we're the state where Ronnie Reagan got his political start. Wasn't that Nancy a sweetheart? I was too young to realize what was going on at the time, but Ron and Nancy are generally considered to be the nadir of the GOP.
Pps. No, not Ralph.
Ppps. I'll have you know I've bulked up to 91 lbs. Been working out. All muscle and mouth.

 

[oggbashan]

Re: Good grief!

Dear Og,
What have you got against me? Anyway, I hear Gray Davis looks great in a pink Speedo. Cringe

Today starts the new fiscal year, there's no budget, and that just means things are normal. We never have a budget on time.

As William Tecumseh Sherman once said, "If nominated I will not run. If elected I will not serve." Besides, I'm not old enough.
MG
Ps. I'll take the dollar, though.

Dear MG,

In the UK you would be old enough. We have had a 21 year old Prime Minister. We get to vote and drink at 18. The downside is a yucky 18th birthday card from the current Member of Parliament.

Running California should be easy.

Option 1: Just sack the current lot of officials and hire this year's graduates in numerate disciplines who are cheaper and don't know what CAN'T be done.

Option 2: Sack the officials and give provisional pardons to the biggest fraudsters in California's jails. They earn their full pardons if they make the books balance. Anyone who worked in Enron's accounting department should do.

Option 3: Kick the San Andreas fault and claim disaster relief from the Federal Government.

Og

PS. We elected a man in a Monkey Suit (I mean "Monkey" not gentleman's evening attire) as Mayor of an important town. He's still Mayor.

 

[oggbashan]

National Geographic

Just checked my files for California.

National Geographic advertisment in 1926. Copyright National Geographic Society and Californians Inc.:

"CALIFORNIA Rich and growing richer. Is this your opportunity for greater success?"

"In California, because of the new wealth produced every year, the same dollar does not wear smooth in passing from pocket to pocket."

"Californians not only are making money, they have it today!"

The advert ends:

"Write for this Booklet.
In size, in wealth, in ways to get ahead, California is tremendous! Californians Inc., a NON-PROFIT organisation interested solely in the sound development of the state, has prepared an illustrated booklet, "California, Where Life is Better." that tells you much about it. We will gladly send you this booklet on request. ..."

Is there still a "Californians Inc.?

Og

 

[Quasimodem]

I intend to be appointed Math's speech writer:

"If nominated, I will take the money and run.

If elected, my administration shall be under the aegises of DurtGirl!"

 

[MathGirl]

Re: National Geographic

Is there still a "Californians Inc.?

Dear Og,
Probably not. If you tried to use the name, though, someone would probably sue your ass. In a Calif court, they'd win.
MG
Ps. Where's my dollar?

 

[TheEarl]

Re: Re: Good grief!

PS. We elected a man in a Monkey Suit (I mean "Monkey" not gentleman's evening attire) as Mayor of an important town. He's still Mayor.

Ogg, I don't think you're making the most of this point. The English city of Hartlepool elected the mascot of Hartelpool United Football Club (A bloke in a giant furry monkey outfit) as their mayor. That's scary.

Even worse was this story I heard about a small town in Venezuala. The citizens of the town became so confused by an elaborate advertising campaign that they elected a brand of foot deoderant as their mayor.

The Earl

 

[Guest]

Re: Nolo contendre

 

[oggbashan]

Dollar?

I have put it in the mandatory off-shore account.

Couldn't manage any of the sexy locations for banks so it is in The Bank Of New South Wales (another former colony).

Og

 

[oggbashan]

Re: Re: Re: Good grief!

Ogg, I don't think you're making the most of this point. The English city of Hartlepool elected the mascot of Hartelpool United Football Club (A bloke in a giant furry monkey outfit) as their mayor. That's scary.

Even worse was this story I heard about a small town in Venezuala. The citizens of the town became so confused by an elaborate advertising campaign that they elected a brand of foot deoderant as their mayor.

The Earl

That is nearly as bad as write-in candidates and the candidate elected (in the US) even though he had died before polling day.

Og

 

[MathGirl]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Good grief!

Originally posted by oggbashan the candidate elected (in the US) even though he had died before polling day.
Og

That's probably the best type of politician. They can't steal as much.
MG
Ps. Please note that the late Sonny Bono was not from my part of California.

 

[Guest]

No offense to MG, I'd vote for her as long as she didn't wear pink. But I say give California back to Mexico then get the Alamo back from Texas. Otherwise cut CA in half per MG and simply rename So. Cal. Disneywood.

Perdita (Sp. pr. now)

 

[MathGirl]

Otherwise cut CA in half per MG and simply rename So. Cal. Disneywood.

Dear Perdita,
Oh, okay, you win. I'll be governor of California. Against my better judgement, mind you. One thing, though, we saw it in half just north of Fresno and give the bottom half to Mexico. I hate to do that to the poor Mexicans, but somebody's gotta take it. El Presidente Vincente Fox is sure to me better than Gray Davis the ..ugh ... demokrat.
MG

 

[Guest]

MG: my dollar's in the mail; hell, I'll make it $5.

Mexico could make better use of So. Cal., but let the new border patrol let Mexicans come and go freely and keep the Republicans out (at present the only thing I can say about the south is they have better Mexican food than SF). We'll have to think of a name for the GOP-ers along the line of wetbacks.

Perdita

 

[MathGirl]

MG: my dollar's in the mail; hell, I'll make it $5.
We'll have to think of a name for the GOP-ers along the line of wetbacks.

Dear Perdita,
Okay, I'll start as soon as your contribution clears the bank.

Republicans are sort of uppity, so we could call them the moist dorsals. Sounds better than wetback.
MG, Governess-elect

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I think the biggest difference between MG and Arnold is that unlike Arnold, MG can actually switch facial expression...

(Ever noticed that Arnold seem to have as large tits as MG..?)

 

[Quasimodem]

I can see nothing wrong with electing a stiff to office.

We have a long tradition of electing stiffs to office here, and have discovered that they get you into a much less serious variety of trouble than their quick brethren.

Math needs a slogan: "As good as any stiff, and won't smell up the beach!"

No?

 

[Guest]

Republicans are sort of uppity, so we could call them the moist dorsals. Sounds better than wetback.
MG, Governess-elect

As you know, wetback came from crossing the Rio Grande. Our new border won't be a river so I simply meant we need a derogatory term that fits the new border. Have to think about it, I really don't know Fresno and environs.

Oh, how about gate-crashers (as in Golden Gate)?

Can I be your amanuensis?

Oh, crap, someone will trot out the DurtGurl connection in the campaign. Can you send her to New Jersey til after the election? Maybe the Brits will take her in.

Perdita, MathGirl Party Gal

 

[MathGirl]

Oh, crap, someone will trot out the DurtGurl connection in the campaign. Can you send her to New Jersey til after the election? Maybe the Brits will take her in.

Well, at least DurtGurl would carry the So Cal vote.
MG

 

[Svenskaflicka]

The so called vote?

 

[Quasimodem]

I thought the So Called vote was in Florida

 

[lovinanalandy]

Re: Re: Nolo contendre

I agree. It is quite doable. Don't forget Congressman Sonny Bono.

And Mayor Clint Eastwood, Congressman "B-1" Bob Dornan, Congressman Gary Condit, etc.

With all due respect to MG and Perdita and the other two or three wonderful folks from Cal-i-for-ni-yea, it might be better if that slab o' land would simply slip and slide into the sea. Especially Orange County. But good luck, I'm sure ya'll are a damn sight better than Ahnold "It's not a tuuma" Schwarzhisname.