MA Man Just watched Unfaithful, and curious

Would you ever cheat on your significant other

  • Yes, I do and I love it

    Votes: 2 18.2%
  • Have fantasized, but have not had oppertunity

    Votes: 3 27.3%
  • Have fantasized, but never would.

    Votes: 5 45.5%
  • Only a reel creep would consider it no matter what the circumstances

    Votes: 1 9.1%

  • Total voters
    11

Rassitter

Literotica Guru
Joined
Nov 24, 2002
Posts
1,807
Hi,

34 year old MA Man here. Home alone tonight and kind of bored. GF wentwent out with friends. (Yay) Red Sox are not on (Boo) But they did already win! (Yay again) and I am bored as hell.

Watched "Unfaithful" on on demand, what an incredibly hot movie. (That hallway seen) Whew! What a turn on.

I am in a relationship now, that has kind of fizzled, but we are kind of tied together, (Houses, children etc..) but sometimes I really think their has to be more out there.

Can any women relate, have you ever tried an affair, how did it work out?

Does it always end bad?

Feel free to answer here or PM.

Thank you
 
Wow, I thought I was having a depressing night before.

*Laughs* Sometimes you just got to laugh.

No interest at all...
 
Bump,

Wow, ok I apparently have created the most boring thread ever. Over 70 views and no responses. The guy asking ladies to pee in his mouth is getting a better response!

*shaking my head*
 
a response, though prob not what you want to hear...

An affair is probably a guaranteed way to end your relationship with maximum hurt to your SO and kids.

At best it destroys any vestige of trust between you. If you no longer communicate much, this may not seem a big deal.

However, it really does make it near impossible to rescue your relationship. Initially, an affair may be fun, but before long it may make your main relationship even harder to stay in , because you will be more acutely aware of what is missing. Then you are faced with some uncomfortable choices:
  • leave your partner, deal with your kids' hurt and try to introduce them to your new partner, hoping they will not be to hostile to the woman who broke up their home and took their mom's place in your life
  • stick in an empty relationship, using meaningless casual encounters to ease your emptiness until the kids grow up and the mortgage is paid , allowing you to leave
  • watching the hurt caused to your new partner by playing second fiddle to your SO at birthdays , holidays etc'
  • if your new partner is also attached with kids, you also see her suffer, agonising over similar choices

I could go on...

Affairs can be ok in an open relationship, where both partners understand the situation and are happy with that lifestyle.
Secret affairs destroy the trust and respect which is the foundation of any meaningful relationship. They cause hurt and emotional scarring to all involved, particularly kids caught in the middle.
But what if your partner doesn't find out? What they don't know won't hurt them, right?
Wrong again. For one thing, most people - particularly women - will sense that something is not right even if they don't actually find lipstick on your dick. So they may worry for months and years over it, afraid to confront you, afraid they are being paranoid. And every time they ask you about some aspect of it, you need to tell another little lie, and another, and another...
Before you know it, your whole life becomes a fabric of lies and distortions till you don't even know who you are or what you feel any more. This is not a good place to be.

Every affair I have seen creates an emotional holocaust for all involved, if it gets uncovered. If it stays hidden, it eats away at your relationship, destroying your integrity and your partners self-worth. It's like wood rot - it stays hidden for so long, but then the smell gets real bad, and if you ignore that long enough you fall through the floor one day.

If your relationship sucks, talk to your partner or see a counsellor or read "too good to leave, too bad to stay" by Mira Kirschenbaum for example. Maybe you can still make it work - if it was good once, it can be good again.
If there is really no future, then make a clean break and get yourself sorted out before you look for someone to build a new relationship with.

I know some people have affairs and move on to happy lives with their new partners, but it is a very messy and painful way to achieve this, especially if kids are involved.

I have never seen 'Unfaithful', but it is make-believe, like all movies.
Did any of the characters watch their kids school careers go down the toilet because of the emotional upset of their parents break-up?
Did it have scenes of 12 year olds regressing to bed wetting the same way?
Did it show how it feels to watch the psychological destruction of someone you once loved, knowing you are responsible?

I'm sorry, but that is much more the reality - and it sounds like you need a reality check, as we all do sometimes. If you want to know about real affairs, check out a marriage counsellor, not your video store.
 
Thanks Marty, all responses are welcome, and you have some good points. Thanks

For the record, I am neither married, nor have any childred. But I do have a girlfriend that I live with and she has childred. She sometimes acts unstable has trouble keeping a normal job, so I am worried how her children would suffer if I left. Also makes it not so cheery around the house sometimes. It is complicated, but I am sure you have heard it all before.

For the record, in the movie. Let's see, The woman becomes a basket case, her family suffers greatly and the husband ends up killing the other guy. Just a quick recap for you. Not exactly peaches and cream potrayal.

Maybe a clean break is best. But I would feel like I was tossing them into the street.

Also was not looking to start a new long term relationship to replace her, just wondering if anyone else ever got lonely even though they were technically with someone, and how they handled it.
 
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