Luxury

[Joe Wordsworth]

My father (the greatest human being ever and my total hero) is making me take a vacation this year.

He has gotten me a suite at The Hilton for a weekend, is taking my phone (Pocket PC Phone) away so I am detached from work, is taking my books and notes and articles away so I am detached from school, and is making me get a massage and spend some time in the sauna.

I am totally freaked out about it, too.

I'm a connected guy--very controlling. I'm terrified of not being in direct control and contact with my courses and running my business. Terrified.

How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

 

[cantdog]

Sex is good for that sort of anxiety, or any puzzle which it's fun to work out the answer to (like sex).

It is a discipline, in a way, I grant you. I had difficulty with it at first, but I detach nicely now. Saunas can be spacy and permit the mind to wander unleashed for a bit, if you feel fundamentally comfortable in them. Have fun, if possible!

 

[Lucifer_Carroll]

My father (the greatest human being ever and my total hero) is making me take a vacation this year.

He has gotten me a suite at The Hilton for a weekend, is taking my phone (Pocket PC Phone) away so I am detached from work, is taking my books and notes and articles away so I am detached from school, and is making me get a massage and spend some time in the sauna.

I am totally freaked out about it, too.

I'm a connected guy--very controlling. I'm terrified of not being in direct control and contact with my courses and running my business. Terrified.

How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

Fuck dude. Just fuck. That's a major problem you got.

Um, here I'm going to share what a Christian friend says he uses whenever things are out of control (not the same but will translate well I hope): "So what I do is remember that I'm not in control, never was in control, never will be in control. Life is filled with all these surprises and disconnects and little bumps and its all part of the plan, you know. You gotta remember that he's the one who controls it all and to presume you hold that job is stupid. So you gotta let it go when it's too much and let him have the reigns so he can steer you back on course. That's the Divine Plan. That's what I gotta remember."



Meanwhile, I would suggest you really explore, um, anything. Being controlling and all that may help you succeed, but it'll never let you succeed if you know what I mean.

Oh by the way, congrats on your posh acoutrements, maybe someday with hard work I'll know a second person who gets to lap luxury like that. (As one hellbound towards being a professional student, I'm unlikely to ever experience it myself, but I do hope you can unwind enough to enjoy it (it's a once in a lifetime opportunity)).

 

[DirtyJJ]

My father (the greatest human being ever and my total hero) is making me take a vacation this year.

He has gotten me a suite at The Hilton for a weekend, is taking my phone (Pocket PC Phone) away so I am detached from work, is taking my books and notes and articles away so I am detached from school, and is making me get a massage and spend some time in the sauna.

I am totally freaked out about it, too.

I'm a connected guy--very controlling. I'm terrified of not being in direct control and contact with my courses and running my business. Terrified.

How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

How do people NOT do stuff like that? I find it very easy to unplug from responsibility when it is time to relax and enjoy myself. It's a must. I can't imagine not being able to take a break.

What you have planned sounds wonderful. Hopefully after the first couple hours of feeling strange and missing your responsibilities, you will be able to relax and enjoy. Don't freak out! Some people would kill to have a weekend like yours.

The world won't end if you take a break - on a weekend no less! You are too young to be that stressed about your work anyway. Relax and enjoy.

JJ

 

[shereads]

My father (the greatest human being ever and my total hero) is making me take a vacation this year.

He has gotten me a suite at The Hilton for a weekend, is taking my phone (Pocket PC Phone) away so I am detached from work, is taking my books and notes and articles away so I am detached from school, and is making me get a massage and spend some time in the sauna.

I am totally freaked out about it, too.

I'm a connected guy--very controlling. I'm terrified of not being in direct control and contact with my courses and running my business. Terrified.

How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

Think of this weekend as a paradigm shift.

Enjoy the torture, Joe. A decade or two from now, you won't remember what it's like to have time to do nothing. You'll beg for a day without responsibility, and it ain't gonna happen. This is it.

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

I dunno. I don't feel as though I have time to do nothing. I mean, techinically I can hand the weekend over to my partner... and I don't have any classes to teach or take over the weekend... but damn.

I think I'll be going crazy.

And I have no idea what a massage feels like.

 

[The_old_man]

A good massage Is second only to good sex. Both are sensuous pleasure, both are very enjoyable, and both are relaxing.

Enjoy!

 

[cantdog]

Mine, from a professional therapist, was very anxious indeed. She'd seen the x-rays of my ruined back and was fearful throughout she would put me in a wheelchair. It is only my constantly-tight muscles which hold me together. The doc told me to quit the fire service immediately when the films were taken.

She was fearful and I was uncomfortable. Now, there is another kind of massage! That one's damn nice. My daughter tells me the therapeutic kind is good, too, but you couldn't prove it by me.

 

[Wicked-N-Erotic]

Life is short, Joe, so do all you can when you can. Have fun.


Wicked

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

I'm trying to convince my girl to come with... I imagine I could relax with her around (mostly because of the sex thing). That aside, I'll probably be twitching for 48 hours.

 

[minsue]

I'm trying to convince my girl to come with... I imagine I could relax with her around (mostly because of the sex thing). That aside, I'll probably be twitching for 48 hours.

If you're gonna be twitching for 48 hours, she might as well come along and enjoy it.

Sorry.

Very sleepy = very easily amused.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

... How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

That’s the trouble with CONTROL Joe, some things don't respond well to control.

Or, as Princess Leia told Darth Vader, "The tighter your grasp, the more ...will slip through your fingers"

And now we are back amongst Gauche’s grotty minihedrons!

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Originally posted by Virtual_Burlesque
That’s the trouble with CONTROL Joe, some things don't respond well to control.

Or, as Princess Leia told Darth Vader, "The tighter your grasp, the more ...will slip through your fingers"

And now we are back amongst Gauche’s grotty minihedrons!

Bah, everything is better with control. Even sex.

...especially sex.

 

[Liar]

Bah, everything is better with control. Even sex.

...especially sex.

You're missing out dude.



Ok, on a serious note. You seem to like to be in control of your situation. But it seems to me that you don't control the most important thing - your own need of staying on top of things.

I used to be exactly the same - always connected, always busy, keeping a thousand projects and businesses running. Because I felt like everything would collapse if I wasn't there. Which of course was pure bollocks. After a longer hospital visit, a full burnout physical and mental collapse, caused by my demigod attitude and inability to relax, I discovered that the world spun mighty fine without me.

Moral and punchline, or whatever it is called: Take this opportunity to tearn to disconnect now, or you might get forced to disconnect later.

#L

 

[doormouse]

Awww... poor widdle Joe

You need to talk to the Agony Aunt.

 

[Guest]

wow. honestly people who are so uptight and controlling were my number one patients that i saw in the ER.
ulcers
heart disease
horrid stuff. gatta learn that life is short and what does it all mean anyway.. priorities, babe.

i have a cousin who was just like you. totally involved in his business. he was fun once and now that hes got his multi-million dollar yacht and his home on the water... i dont care if i ever see him again. he makes me tired... never stops talking shop.. never stops to think about the big picture..always wound tightly around the minutia.

just try ... to let go for a little while. what disaster will really come from it?

 

[poohlive]

If it's a real problem Joe, and I can understand how it is, in your condition. Maybe you should give the vacation to someone else... hmmm, like me for example.
I'll bite the bullet for you, Joe. I'll suffer those long hours of sleeping in, and that excrutiating massage. I'll go down to the bar and have some drinks, listen to some music, talk to a few of those real people out there in the real world.
Hell, I might even take a dip in the pool.
Don't worry Joe, I've got your back on this one. You keep up with work, and I'll take one for the team. (hee hee)

 

[impressive]

How do people do stuff like that? Just, take a break? How do they not go stir-crazy?

A trip to Jamaica TOTALLY cured me of that "connected" compulsion. The same feelings of total relaxation returned when I visited Costa Rica and stayed at hostels. Checked my e-mail just once, mid week, from an Internet cafe. Other than that -- no TV, no newspapers, no phones. IT WAS GLORIOUS!

It takes an effort to let go -- but once you do, you'll never look back.

 

[GingerV]

I'm not being a smart-ass, for some people relaxation is a learned skill. I had to relearn it at the end of my degree...or just give up and go completely crazy. I get where you're coming from. My entire family has stories from the X-mas I reorganized the entire garage just because I couldn't remember how not to have a job on. [whisper ] I sorted all the nails by size and length [/whisper]

It sounds dumb, but some folks can forget how to let go and relax. But it's a necessary life skill. The difference between the ones who have it and the ones who don't is, as was mentioned earlier, a quick heart attack and a very long nap. I twitched on my detox from impossible stress too, Joe. Just convince yourself that relaxation is important, fulfill each impulse as it comes, resist the temptation to schedule your relaxing vacation all to hell, and enjoy it. Not everyone gets the opportunity. Just sitting still and quiet is one of life's joys.

You'll come back better able to do your various jobs, having learned that the world does not fall apart just because you've let go of it for a little while.

G

 

[Guest]

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Personally, I'd hate to think it an age thing.

 

[Guest]

 

[gauchecritic]

I think what you're afraid of Joe is not the not being in control but whether you can regain control when you come back.

And actually, the answer is: You can't.

So what you are afraid of is change.

But the good answer is: You can take control of what you come back to.

An analogy would be a good thing here, and I have the perfect one.

You have control over a pan of cold water. You can put it in the fridge and keep it cold (controlled, unchanged) or you can make the water hot by putting it on the gas ring.

You leave it to boil and when you come back it is no longer cold water. You have lost control of the cold water. However, what you can now take control of is the hot water. In which you can boil an egg or with which you can make a cup of tea/coffee/Bovril/whatever.

Advice = let the pan boil.

Spend your break with the warm thought of all the back breaking work you'll need to do to take control of a new thing, with a fresh mind.

Advice for later life = It's all bollocks anyway.

Gauche

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Originally posted by gauchecritic
I think what you're afraid of Joe is not the not being in control but whether you can regain control when you come back.

And actually, the answer is: You can't.

So what you are afraid of is change.

But the good answer is: You can take control of what you come back to.

An analogy would be a good thing here, and I have the perfect one.

You have control over a pan of cold water. You can put it in the fridge and keep it cold (controlled, unchanged) or you can make the water hot by putting it on the gas ring.

You leave it to boil and when you come back it is no longer cold water. You have lost control of the cold water. However, what you can now take control of is the hot water. In which you can boil an egg or with which you can make a cup of tea/coffee/Bovril/whatever.

Advice = let the pan boil.

Spend your break with the warm thought of all the back breaking work you'll need to do to take control of a new thing, with a fresh mind.

Advice for later life = It's all bollocks anyway.

Gauche

As good advice as that is... not really up my alley.

I mean, I'm not afraid that things will change very much (if at all) over two days. Classes will still meet. The company is well-designed, it can coast without my pushing it.

I just don't know that I can unplug. The idea of /that/ is what's getting to me.

Admittedly, its not a very sensible fear... but fears don't have to be sensible, I don't guess.

 

[Virtual_Burlesque]

... I just don't know that I can unplug. The idea of /that/ is what's getting to me....

So, your insecurity is caused by not having enough control of your control over your control.

Is that it