Love!!

[HBergeron]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxigzO8mxw4CmuwuIbH

Well said.

 

[BlackCashmere]

I just saw this thread, I think for the first time.

Love has been very much something I've contemplated here. The Greeks had a number of different words for love.

There is Eros. Erotic love. The love you have for your lover. It's sexy. It's that quickening of the heart when you see them. It's that tingling in the naughty bits when you think about them. And it's most likely what we all first think about when we meet someone who is attractive to us. The Greeks actually often considered this the "least" form of love, but I disagree. For me, that erotic love is where excitement lives. But it can also be where joy lives. Where passion exists. That is amazing and beautiful in it's own right. It is what songs and art are created through.

There is Ludus. That's young love. Playful love. Childhood love. They talk about dancing with someone as Ludus. Flirting. Perhaps Lit embodies Ludus in many ways - perhaps surprisingly as most of us would think of Eros when we think of Lit. But the banter and flirting on the boards, often with strangers, is Ludos. And it's fun. It's also joyful.

Then there is Philia, or deep friendship. I think many of us here have found that, more than any other kind of love. Well, maybe not. Certainly I have. And perhaps my sig line is wrong...but I stand by it (more below). That friendship borne of years of common experience. Talking, sharing emotions. Experiencing life together. In many ways, a good marriage grows into Philia.

But Pragma is what the greeks labeled that long standing love of a married couple. That old couple who seems to always know what the other is thinking. Who have been through life together and still hold hands. It is patience with someone. I think mostly, for me, I struggle with this.

There is Storge or familial love. This is the love we share with family. Parents, children, siblings. It is a love born perhaps of requirement, and yet as a parent I would argue that it is the love that I could never let go. I may fall in or out of love with other people, but I loved both of my children before they were born and cannot imagine not loving them.

Then there Agape. This is a love that is truly amazing. It is a love that is selfless and radical. Is a spiritual love born, perhaps of God, or whatever you want. It is something beyond ourselves. I have written, in a number of places on Lit that "I came for Eros but found Agape." There are people here who have been there for me, and I've been for others. People who simply give. I won't name names but they have hauled my ass through some pretty rough times. Giving. Loving. Caring. This is a gift that I've found here.

You may be surprised that I've left self love for last. (Tee hee...I know where your minds went! ). The greeks actually defined two types of self love. Narcissism which is bad. It is love of self gone awry. Unfortunately, we all too often see it in the real world. But I think too, we all too often condemn all self love this way.

The Greeks recognized that we must love ourselves too: Philautia is the kind of self love that is positive. It is a love of self not unlike the Philia we have for our friends. It is love not unlike the Storge of love for our children and family. It should be natural. Who should be a better friend than yourself? What family member should you love more than yourself? And I've seen here that many of us struggle with this. Indeed, in my reading of posts above and many many conversations I've had here, I think this is the love that we struggle with more than any. So many of you are more than willing to reach out in love to another, here or anywhere, but yet you struggle with loving yourself.

I ask, as you go out into the world today that you love. All kinds of love. Whether it is Erotic love that wields passion and excitement. Or that Agape that is so mysterious and spiritual. And I ask that each of you know that you are worthy of all the forms of love, but especially Philautia. Love yourself. For I have seen the beauty of so many of your souls.

So beautiful my dear friend...I love you

 

[AbsintheFather]

Usually, if I see a post that long my eyes glaze over and I move along. That was a good one. It bears a couple readings.

 

[Ellobomuerto]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxigy48qRaS8YVeRV6E

 

[Ellobomuerto]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxigzruhqeJ-lOUloHq

 

[Ellobomuerto]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxigznrbOqbvTtz4sZc

 

[Ellobomuerto]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxigzs7dLrR_bC4jCum

 

[PeteHulbert37]

Spread a little holiday joy and love.

 

[Lollygirl26]

Spread a little holiday joy and love.

I love how you spread those things.

 

[Chasingdreams]

http://i1342.photobucket.com/albums/o775/bethedgar57/For%20posting/The%20one_zpshlr4bq2q.jpg~original

I LOVE everything about this thread. This was classic. And so very true. I do not love easily for love has betrayed me many times from a very young age. Love has always come with strings attached so I have learned to carry scissors at all times. I was surprised once and while amazing and life changing, I ruined it, simply because I lacked the tools to accept it and be honest with him. But without that experience, I would not have received the foundation he blessed me with to finally learn that I am in fact worthy of love and I most certainly wouldn’t be where I am today without him.

I can count on one hand the number of people I have loved/do love with my entire being and I don’t even need to use my thumb and am including my two kids. I will forever love him for what he taught me about love and myself. And I will forever love my E for helping me build on that and holding my hand the entire way. We’ve never said I love you’s to each other and I doubt we ever will. But he’s my best friend and he knows it. Two very different men, both crossed my path thru Lit, and I have two very different loves for them. They will both live in my heart forever.

E was just telling me this past week that the more he gets to know me the more he realizes where my need for unconditional love comes from. But as I reflect, I realize we all have the need for unconditional love on some level. Some are just more accepting and open to receive it. I believe in love because I’ve been fortunate to experience that all-encompassing, powerful, life changing love. It was a gift and it was a blessing. But to open myself up to that again? I guess only time will tell. I wasn’t looking for it then and I’m certainly not looking for it now.

Lit is probably an odd place to quote the Bible, but one of my favorite verses is 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

That’s the love I’m holding out for. If/when it happens, it happens. If not, so be it. In the meantime, I’m working on loving myself and mending fences with my family, learning to love them in the same spirit as Corinthians advises.

 

[angelofthenorth]

I LOVE everything about this thread. This was classic. And so very true. I do not love easily for love has betrayed me many times from a very young age. Love has always come with strings attached so I have learned to carry scissors at all times. I was surprised once and while amazing and life changing, I ruined it, simply because I lacked the tools to accept it and be honest with him. But without that experience, I would not have received the foundation he blessed me with to finally learn that I am in fact worthy of love and I most certainly wouldn’t be where I am today without him.

I can count on one hand the number of people I have loved/do love with my entire being and I don’t even need to use my thumb and am including my two kids. I will forever love him for what he taught me about love and myself. And I will forever love my E for helping me build on that and holding my hand the entire way. We’ve never said I love you’s to each other and I doubt we ever will. But he’s my best friend and he knows it. Two very different men, both crossed my path thru Lit, and I have two very different loves for them. They will both live in my heart forever.

E was just telling me this past week that the more he gets to know me the more he realizes where my need for unconditional love comes from. But as I reflect, I realize we all have the need for unconditional love on some level. Some are just more accepting and open to receive it. I believe in love because I’ve been fortunate to experience that all-encompassing, powerful, life changing love. It was a gift and it was a blessing. But to open myself up to that again? I guess only time will tell. I wasn’t looking for it then and I’m certainly not looking for it now.

Lit is probably an odd place to quote the Bible, but one of my favorite verses is 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

That’s the love I’m holding out for. If/when it happens, it happens. If not, so be it. In the meantime, I’m working on loving myself and mending fences with my family, learning to love them in the same spirit as Corinthians advises.

Bless you child, I hope that you find it

 

[Pantyboy74]

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself.

Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

 

[SassySheDevil]

^^^^ That made me tear up.

 

[angelofthenorth]

^^^^ That made me tear up.

lovely isn't it. i've just told him

 

[Ellobomuerto]

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself.

Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

Says spot on how I feel about someone very special. Thank you

 

[Pantyboy74]

^^^^ That made me tear up.

lovely isn't it. i've just told him

Says spot on how I feel about someone very special. Thank you

I just thought they were the perfect description of true love.

 

[Chasingdreams]

Bless you child, I hope that you find it

Thanks angel, but I wouldn’t hold your breath.

 

[Chasingdreams]

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself.

Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

Omg this. It really was this! This so beautifully describes the indescribable tornado of love. Christmas has made me a mess of emotions and your words just made me cry. Thank you for these words. But I refuse to believe this can only happen once. For if that’s true, it’s already come and gone for me and that’s just too sad to ever accept.

 

[HBergeron]

Last night I saw some of my family, and had a great time, but today I hung out with friends I've known since grade school (a little informal 'after presents' get together). I'm thinking that of all the different types and degrees of love we can share with others, and family, of course, being foremost among them, the simple love and loyalty of longtime friends somehow always touches me the most. Families are a given, but our friends chose us, and we them.

 

[PeteHulbert37]

Last night I saw some of my family, and had a great time, but today I hung out with friends I've known since grade school (a little informal 'after presents' get together). I'm thinking that of all the different types and degrees of love we can share with others, and family, of course, being foremost among them, the simple love and loyalty of longtime friends somehow always touches me the most. Families are a given, but our friends chose us, and we them.

I agree, there is a pure joy within a friendship that is loyal and undying.

 

[PeteHulbert37]

Don't fall in love, be in love.

Be bold, share with everyone. Your friends, your lovers, your dentist (maybe not your dentist). lol

Tell someone everyday that you love him/her.

 

[LothlorienGaladriel65]

https://1drv.ms/i/s!AvAzWBXQwCxig1VgM_llkicxbMF6

 

[LanguageOfLove]

Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more.

You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself.

Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are.

The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all.

A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you.

You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible.

You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.

This was an amazing post PB, I truly love this so much, and for someone who's a romantic and a believer in true connections, this really touched me. Thank you for sharing that. So many truths to that

 

[angelofthenorth]

^^^^^
hello lovely nice to see you back

 

[LanguageOfLove]

Last night I saw some of my family, and had a great time, but today I hung out with friends I've known since grade school (a little informal 'after presents' get together). I'm thinking that of all the different types and degrees of love we can share with others, and family, of course, being foremost among them, the simple love and loyalty of longtime friends somehow always touches me the most. Families are a given, but our friends chose us, and we them.

While on my vacation, I talked with one of my best friends from highschool, we hadn't seen each other in many many years. It was nice to see that connection was still there. So I can relate with those true friendships that are there for you no matter how long you are apart.