Love Swing?

[kaoskytton]

It's not crazy, Tania. We all have our castles fall down on us sooner or later.

"And what it all comes down to, night shall overtake." - KMFDM, "Trust"

Take your bath. We'll be here when you return. We will always be here.

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

It's not crazy, Tania. We all have our castles fall down on us sooner or later.

I've never been delusional enough to belief it to be a castle... a sod house maybe but not a castle, lmao. And my sod house falls down on me at least once a month. Chris and I just rebuild it... or sometimes I rebuild it alone and Chris comes to live in it. After you talk to me for a longer time you'll start to notice the trend, lol. I baby him and forgive him more than I should. But on the flip side there have been times when I've sliced myself to bits in the bathroom floor and he picked me up and held me. No one else would have. We both have problems and we try... it just overwhelms a person every now and then.

Still, I appreciate you and Jack... being supportive on this crappy first of the month, lol.

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

We are here for you. I know that is not as good as having Chris. I dont get why he doesnt come to see you. That is a piss poor excuse. Now when you take finals you will be worst off because he didnt come.

EXACTLY!!!! That's what I'm saying... everyone understands why I would be upset and frustrated but it completely confuses him! Sometimes he has the intuition and intelligence of a pebble .

But what really makes me angry is that he's too tired to drive out and see me (and if he would just say that, I would be fine) but he's trying to make it look like he's looking out for MY well being. He says I need rest because I'm sick... after I tell him that I feel 100% better today and I want him to hold me. He says I need rest for my finals... he's never given a damn about my lack of sleep before school at any other point! Chris doesn't want to drive out to see me because Chris doesn't want to. End of story. His trying to look like a caring guy who just wants what's best for me is something I would just laugh at if not for the fact that I'm so angry.

Oh, and your story was very beautiful. ((hugs)) Somehow I don't think I'm the innocent one... perhaps the untried and stupid one but not the innocent one, lol.

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

It is just how I am seeing you right now Tania. It is a story that will change as we all get to know each other. I guess I am looking at your age and seeing innocense. I too am innocent. Maybe I should have said naive

**Definition of innocence: free from sin/evil... one without guile...
**Definition of naive: unaffectedly simple... obscure thinking...
I have an overabundance of guile, lol. I'm also rather vindictive and could be 'evil' . And my thoughts are in no way simple or obscure. Give me more adjectives for I will shoot them down, LOL. Mainly I'm probably in denial more than anything. I know what is wrong with me and in my life but I'm just flowing with it rather than facing it. Hopeful could also be an adjective. I seem to be eternal hopeful. No matter how many times I get kicked to the ground. Could be a good or a horrible trait.

If I had to label you I wouldn't say innocent or naive exactly... loving and caring... submissive and giving... which, like hopefulness and being in denial, can be good as well as they can be a death sentence.

 

[Guest]

 

[kaoskytton]

Guys, I need to say something. From my heart.

Look, I'm a fun, wild ride, and you both say that I've set you free. But I'm not a circus and the lights do go down. In the darkness of my solitude I am not alone with my free spirit and happy energy. I have nightmares, a dark past, and a lot of sadness, too.

My point is, don't throw your lives away because something else looks appealing. I disagree with a lot of ideals because of this. And Tania, this isn't a shot at all but my personal preference, I think too many people want Heaven so much that they forget about Earth. Don't get so hypnotized by the doggie in the window that you forget to feed your own.

Don't throw your lives away because mine looks like a fun ride. Think of it like flying...And sometimes, I crash upon the rocks so hard that I don't come out of it for years. It's not always fun, and it's not some secret cult of fun that you guys have been missing out on.

I'm alone. I've marked my path with the bloody hearts of others (hehe, Pippin, "Hang out with Sami, Love Sami, Hell, Sleep with Sami if you can, but for god's sake don't date her! She treats her boyfriends like shit!"). I don't have a good relationship with my family, and I'm not like this 24-7. I have a day job. I wear a business suit. I'm not a 24-7 porn star, and yeah, sometimes my life is boring too.

Do what feels right. That's my point. Don't do what I do unless you know it's what's right for you.

 

[Guest]

 

[Guest]

Don't worry... I'm never going to try to become Kaos, lol. I'm not giving up on my ideals to transfer over to try to become a wild porn star vision-and I know that's not you all of the time. You even sent me your picture from one of your rough patches. You help me to see that I can experiment with my life and not be so tense and worried about what others think of me. But, at the same time, I'm still me and I still want my relationship with Chris. I'm more of a relationship oriented girl. Not a marriage oriented girl but when it comes down to it, Chris is my guy and I'll work for him.

I didn't mean to scare you or worry you with my admiration, lol. You help me to come up with good ideas for my relationship. I never meant that I would run out and dump Chris naked at a bus stop (though right now that is tempting, lmao) and try to become you... just that I feel more 'liberated' since I've met you.

 

[Guest]

 

[kaoskytton]

I just felt the need to say it, guys. Jack, you really seem to worship me and I appreciate it, it's very kind and sweet, but you really don't know a thing about me. I'm not just a porn star. I love sex, but I wake up and put on my fuzzy slippers and go make french toast. I don't straddle my faucet and use the little shower thing there to stimulate my clit or anything.

And Tania, I probably wouldn't have said a thing if it wasn't for you. I've destroyed a lot of good relationships because I have the attention span of a hyper newt. I just didn't want you to walk away from Chris just because sex with us sounded fun.

 

[Guest]

And Tania, I probably wouldn't have said a thing if it wasn't for you. I've destroyed a lot of good relationships because I have the attention span of a hyper newt. I just didn't want you to walk away from Chris just because sex with us sounded fun.

LOL @ the attention span of a hypr newt. I usually use 'dyslexic ferret'

Don't worry about Chris and I though... I've spent the last ten months crawling through hot coals to make this relationship work. There's no way I would give it up without a fight and no way in hell that I would end it myself, lol. Sex with you does sound fun and is a great fantasy but on a realistic level I honor and appreciate what I have with Chris. He's my superguy The one and only one that I give all of myself too...

My relationship is really something of a precious pet to me, lol. I coddle it and love it and enjoy it and take care of it... it may pee on the rug sometimes and annoy me but I just wash the carpets and move on with life.

Don't you just love my metaphors? LOL

 

[kaoskytton]

"She turned me into a newt."
"A NEWT?"
"...I got better." - Monty Python.

I'm big on lizards and reptiles, too, even though I only have cats. I love dragons and snakes and lizards and even newts.

Then again, they say cats are dragons after they become domesticated and their wings and scales fall off.

Haha...good. I just have this...bad habit, of somehow, unintentionally, seducing people into a different way of life. You're strong, smart, and know a whole helluva lot independent of me, so I don't think you would do it. I just wanted to express my dislike of the idea.

For example, I'm pretty sure Void would let me do just about anything I wanted to, to his body. If he went off and started shaving head to toe to be the next Rupaul, it would be my fault.

~rolling on the floor laughing harder than I've laughed all year~

 

[Guest]

I think I love all types of animals... well, at least ones that are smaller than I am. Horses, for example, make me really nervous. A year ago I had a little gecko from Madagascar - the kind with the little suction cup feet that can climb up walls and such - he was awesome... had a calcium deficiency though so I gave him away to 'lizard man', lol. I miss him but he's better off... same story with my pacman frog. Now I just have my crazy cat and my old dog (I've had her since I was four )... I would love to adopt another cat though. Especially since (I believe?) this is Adopt A Shelter Cat Month...

I've never heard the cats are dragons thing... ::looks at her cat:: But I could see it, lol.

And, if Void ever went full mode RuPaul, I'd come see him in concert ... I don't think a guy should shave everything... I do like the smooth chest/smooth back thing though... and pubic hair control is a must, lol.

Chris didn't do down there hair control for a couple months and I had to hold a protest... when he realized how much more willing I was to worship his well groomed dick, he's been nice and smooth ever since .

 

[kaoskytton]

Big horse cock, wahoo!

Actually, I ride. I've ridden most of my life. I'm a horse transition as of last month, though. The one I was breaking suffered an unexpected heart attack. I think it's time for us to find a new ranch. But yeah, for the most part I love animals smaller than me.

Good story. Remind me to send it to you. It's a fairy tale. Nice if you like cats and dragons.

We should all go see Void in concert. He just did something rather extreme last night and it's worth taking a look at.

Haha...it's always appreciated. All the little things about sex (which include the grooming, the outfits, the toys) it just shows you care.

 

[Guest]

I think that I'm afraid of horses just because of the psychopathic one that I had when I was younger... wouldn't let you ride it and attacked anyone that came near it without suger cubes. Almost killed my mum a couple of times . Then, my neighbor/ex-boyfriend had this beautiful black horse that everyone else was terrified of... no one could break it and it wouldn't come to anyone but me. Loved that horse. Still, I was afraid of it when there wasn't a fence separating us (ah, one of my fences, lol).

What extreme thing did Void do? ::intrigued::

 

[kaoskytton]

That's pretty reasonable. I'm afraid of dogs in the same way because I got attacked a lot when I was little. You know, huge overaffectionate Lab, or Newfoundland, or Saint Bernard? I control it and I like them but some part of my heart flutters.

He IMed me last night that he shaved his pubes. All of them. Should have gotten you a pic. Maybe when he gets back.

 

[Guest]

I'm great with dogs... probably because I grew up literally thinking that I belonged in this huge pack of great danes, lol. I was actually the leader... thought I was really special. Well, I am really special actually . Yay for me.

And... I would definitely appreciate a picture of bald Void

 

[kaoskytton]

Hi Tania, I've always wanted to get involved with dogs, but they've got more commitment and that's the worst c word I know!!!

Yeah, can't resist it.

How are you feeling? Have you worked out all your aggressions over Chris?

 

[Guest]

Hi Tania, I've always wanted to get involved with dogs, but they've got more commitment and that's the worst c word I know!!!

Yeah, can't resist it.

How are you feeling? Have you worked out all your aggressions over Chris?

I like committing myself to animals... they truly appreciate the effort and return the favor. I really really want to get a parrot... more than anything. Those things most often get madly clingy and obsessive with the people who love them, lol.

As for Chris, I'm currently thinking up ways to punish him. Nothing extreme... want to help me?

 

[kaoskytton]

Yeah, my cat loves me a lot more than anybody else has. You don't see my name as "SamiLoves___." I'm getting his name tattooed on me, though...yay! Kaos forever!

Actually, yes I do and I love helping. You should restrain him with bungee cords (you can wrap the one hook around his wrist and stretch the other wherever you need to) and perform that "milking" prostate trick.

 

[Guest]

Hmm... I've been wanting to practice that trick for a long time anyhow... do you have any tips on it? I could always just tie him up with bungee cord and make out with my friend Milo right in front of him... that would be ample punishment as well, lol. When I untied him, he would never speak to me again but hey.

We've made up now... he's going to change his work schedule to see me this Thursday... but he also just shot down my office sex dream...