Looking for feedback on "A Kinky Valentine"

[REDWAVE]

I recently posted what I consider the most "literary" of my stories on LE, entitled "A Kinky Valentine." I did get one good comment about it, but so far no serious critique from another author. I'd appreciate anyone taking a look at it, especially those of you I've read and critiqued. Hit me with your best shot! Here's the link to it:
http://literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=28156

Thanks

REDWAVE