lonely.

[CherryBomb24]

How do you overcome being lonely? I'm not sure how to word all of this so bear with me please.
My boyfriend is currently in afghanistan for another 9months and i just want like a cuddle buddy or something. But most guys would think sex would be involved and thats not what i'm wanting. i'm not a cheater nor will i ever be.
I'm not like a horny lonely, i dont want sex or even feel the need for it, i just want someone to hold me and let me know everythings gonna be fine.
I miss my boyfriend like crazy. I miss his arms around me. I miss his smile and that adorable giggle he does when he picks on me. I miss his touch. The look in his eyes when he looks at me. The WoW nerd that can tell me every beneficial spell of a paladin off the top of his head lol The dorky way he stood when playing pool lol What he would always call me even when we were around his friends/family. The obsessive way he would always have every peice of food on his plate in a specific spot and eat it in a specific order lol

I just wanna sit on the couch with someone and them put their arms around me and keep me close.

blah.

 

[frdrcnjohn]

I would

I would hold you if you were here, no funny stuff just hold you

 

[frdrcnjohn]

I do hope your boy friend is doing fine where he is and my prayers go to our soldiers each and every night God Bless the U.S.A.

 

[frdrcnjohn]

lonliness

I am noy sure how to overcome lonliness, I can be in a room full off people and still be lonely, most times I am completly content with only me in the room or garage working on my toys or hobbies. I do think that this comes from within you and only you can change this feeling

 

[KarennaC]

I had a friend once who gave the most incredible hugs and always made me feel comforted and not alone. He was gay, so there was never a chance of anything sexual between us.

I can't imagine being away from my fiance for that long, and Cherry, my heart goes out to you and to him. Do you have any male friends you can trust to keep things on a G-rated level if you ask them to cuddle? Not all men would take a request for cuddling as a request for sex, especially if you spell things out very clearly at the beginning.

I hope you're able to find someone/something to help you with this.

 

[emap]

They make snuggle pillows, it's basically just a really long pillow you can well snuggle, doesn't work when you are awake but pretty good when you are asleep.

Course one of the better ones are pets, cats or dogs, cats are especially good at snuggling, when you go to bed and watching TV, they enjoy it and well it is a living thing in your lap.

Dogs are good for that as well but they tend to be a little more rambunctious most of the time and they are alot messier than a cat, but they work great if you are allergic to a cat or just don't like cats.

 

[Guest]

God Bless the Troops

Cherrybomb,
I hope you can find a friend that understands the purpose of a hug and provides what you need.

 

[Lobo_8]

I just want you to know that your not alone in your loneliness, CherryBomb. I'm in Iraq right now on my 3rd trip over. My SO has those same feelings and all I can tell you to do is stay busy. Get involved with his FRG, meet new people, send care packages of stuff that will mean something special to the both of you.

The best care package I got had a cat toy that my daughter put in it. I carry that thing everywhere with me.

If you can find someone to cuddle with make sure that the cuddle buddy knows thats as far as it goes. I wish you both the best.

-Burns

 

[Guest]

Lobo,
Thanks for your service...
Tell the troops over there that there "IS" appreciation here stateside for your sacrifices!

Stay Safe!

 

[subwannabe]

Do you have parents or siblings? Aren't they supposed to hug you at times like this? I would really recommend against finding a male snuggle person because you are right, males have a hard time of this, and besides, if I were your hubby I would be upset if I found out you had another male to snuggle with. I would naturally suspect that it went farther than that since us males know how males are.

 

[coastal-boy]

women tend to understand better. just saying...it wouldn't matter if the hugs came from a man or woman and it might be easier and safer

 

[SimonBrooke]

How do you overcome being lonely? I'm not sure how to word all of this so bear with me please.
My boyfriend is currently in afghanistan for another 9months and i just want like a cuddle buddy or something. But most guys would think sex would be involved and thats not what i'm wanting.

Seriously: get a kitten. Cats can be extremely good at cuddling, very affectionate, and no sexual issues. I do understand what you're feeling - the person I'm playing with is an ocean away just at present, and I don't like it at all. But getting your cuddles from a guy would not be a good plan - it would leave all three of you emotionally confused and probably unhappy - and I don't believe getting them from a girl would be much better.

If he's likely to do several tours of duty, you should talk to him seriously about whether you should try to get pregnant next time he's home. A baby - his baby - would be a lot better than a kitten.

 

[shiny5437]

Not sure if this will help but it will highlight the power of a big hug - even from a stranger.

http://www.freehugscampaign.org/

Don't overlook your family and friends for hugs - they might need one as much as you do!

 

[CherryBomb24]

Thank you guys for all of your kind words.
I do have 2 cats and a dog - and none really cuddle lol the cats are older so prefer to be left alone and my dog is too old to control her bladder so i dont let her on the furnature much less the bedrooms. I'm going to a friends house this weekend, who is also a really good friend of my boyfriends, he's a big teddy bear so all i gotta do is reach for a hug and i know i'll get it. My boyfriend trusts him with his life and told me to go down there as much as possible. I just dont feel comfortable around the people thats always at their house so i dont go very often. And for a baby, not gonna happen anytime soon lol Yeah i care about him n miss him but a baby isnt the answer. I'm not emotionally or financially set to have another child.

 

[SweetErika]

And for a baby, not gonna happen anytime soon lol Yeah i care about him n miss him but a baby isnt the answer. I'm not emotionally or financially set to have another child.

Thank you for being mature and responsible enough to think this way.

All kids deserve far better than being brought into this world because their parent(s) "wanted something to cuddle."

 

[bruisedangel]

Oh dear. You're just asking for trouble, in the want of someone to cuddle, just out of loneliness. I understand the feeling. I wish that there wasn't an ocean separating me from snuggles and smooches. Alas, there is. So, what you do is learn to cope. You find a hobby. You get clothing that smells like him, and wear it, and sleep with it. You email as often as possible. Chat in real time, if that's an option. Fantasize. But do not, absolutely do not, find someone to 'just cuddle with.' It will only lead to you feeling confused. Which in turn will lead to you feeling like, "If I can't have the guy I want, I'll settle for the guy who's within touch."

 

[CherryBomb24]

Oh dear. You're just asking for trouble, in the want of someone to cuddle, just out of loneliness. I understand the feeling. I wish that there wasn't an ocean separating me from snuggles and smooches. Alas, there is. So, what you do is learn to cope. You find a hobby. You get clothing that smells like him, and wear it, and sleep with it. You email as often as possible. Chat in real time, if that's an option. Fantasize. But do not, absolutely do not, find someone to 'just cuddle with.' It will only lead to you feeling confused. Which in turn will lead to you feeling like, "If I can't have the guy I want, I'll settle for the guy who's within touch."

i understand that, its why i was asking if theres a way to get rid of this feeling or even null it.
a hug once in a while would be fine. i'm normally not the type of person to just go around giving/getting hugs. I think what i ment from a cuddle buddy was someone to hug me whenever i felt like shit. I'm not asking for someone to sit down and just hold me, i'm just wanting a shoulder.

 

[SimonBrooke]

i understand that, its why i was asking if theres a way to get rid of this feeling or even null it.
a hug once in a while would be fine. i'm normally not the type of person to just go around giving/getting hugs. I think what i ment from a cuddle buddy was someone to hug me whenever i felt like shit. I'm not asking for someone to sit down and just hold me, i'm just wanting a shoulder.

Over in the BDSM forum, you'll find the Distance Domination Support Thread, where a lot of people who live with very long distance relationships hang out. I appreciate you may not be kinked yourself, but I think you'd probably find yourself welcome, and you'd find a lot of people with similar stresses to your own. OK, so, online sympathy is a lot less good than a real warm body to hug. But it's better than nothing.

 

[StrayKat]

i just want like a cuddle buddy or something. But most guys would think sex would be involved and thats not what i'm wanting

I would say your family or female friend would be the best answer. Why another man?

 

[CherryBomb24]

I would say your family or female friend would be the best answer. Why another man?

i didnt specifically say another man did it? yeah i implied it but i was asking for anything in general.

 

[StrayKat]

i didnt specifically say another man did it? yeah i implied it but i was asking for anything in general.

I thought the main problem and your reason for posting here was how to explain another man you just wanted cuddling and no sex.

 

[CherryBomb24]

I thought the main problem and your reason for posting here was how to explain another man you just wanted cuddling and no sex.

no i was explaining that i was lonely and needed a good cuddle.

 

[StrayKat]

no i was explaining that i was lonely and needed a good cuddle.

Ok. My bad.

 

[ClootieDumpling]

My SO is overseas as well. I had a t-shirt that smelled of him... that was great to cuddle! You've just reminded me to ask for another!

 

[CherryBomb24]

Ok. My bad.

i do get where you were coming from tho, my appologies for the misunderstanding. I should have been more clear in my OP. I was just looking for something to get over the feeling, whether it be a hug or a pet. anything i can try ya know what i mean.
I've been getting back into my artwork but that seems to make me feel even more lonely. gives me the time to htink but also vent at the same time-if that makes any sense. Seems it makes me think moreso than vent. I also seem to be turning into a hobit. I havent really left my house in weeks. I think thats more due to lack of finances than anything tho.