Lmao

[destinie21]

I'm sorry about the frivolity of this post but I had to share. The humor and Irony(who really know what the hell Irony is anyway)
was to delicious to keep to myself

We (The Two mrs.)have a friend who, for the past while, has been involved with a total asshole. After months on end of jerking her around, of not being there when she needed him and of treating her dismissively and disrespectfully, he announced that he was off to marry a former flame. The bitterness meter hit critical mass following this revelation, let me hasten to assure you. But then she got better. She decided to have nothing more to do with him and even eschewed all thoughts of revenge, as she said she just didn't have the energy and trusted in karma to even the score. So apart from forwarding all his shit-eating "I can explain" emails to her friends so we could all ridicule this idiot, she did nothing. (Goes much against her grain so I'm sure it was a struggle. A great believer in justice is this girl.)

Karma came through.

Seems there's trouble in paradise. Mr. Fuckwit's "fiancée" has just announced that there may be a problem with their plans AS SHE HAS DECIDED IT'S TIME TO COME OUT OF THE CLOSET.

Isn't that poetic? Every single one of her friends has reacted similarly upon hearing the news: dead silence for a beat, then hysterical laughter. You have to admit that it *is* perfect. She couldn't have arranged it better if she tried. In direct contrast to last week, my friend is now wandering around with a perma-grin on her face.

So children, the moral of the story for this week is that you reap what you sow. Not generally quite so dramatically, but it does give one hope doesn't it?

 

[Jenny _S]

I am laughing hard over here, Des. That is way too fucking funny

 

[destinie21]

This is the first time in ages that I've laughed until tears ran down my face.


Just thinking about it gives me a giggle.

 

[whispering_surrender]

Almost makes it worth looking up my ex.....Dear God! What am I thinking???

Whisper

Ps. *giggles* Congrats to your friend Destinie.

 

[Icingsugar]

Now, there's a heartwarmer. My best wishes-of-luck to both your firend and that other girl in finding better blokes and blokettes.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Serves him right, the bastard.

 

[gauchecritic]

That is both funny and yes ironic. Especially ironic if your friend was better in bed than the would-be-wife.

Gauche

P.S maybe your friend should take a leaf...(lettuce leaf?)

 

[Guest]

Nothing personal, Gauche, just a rhetorical musing, but why is it always good in bed or better in bed? There are so many other places in/on/against/under/etc. to be good or better. How does anyone think cyber works?

slight xarumphotl,

Perdita

 

[Icingsugar]

Nothing personal, Gauche, just a rhetorical musing, but why is it always good in bed or better in bed? There are so many other places in/on/against/under/etc. to be good or better. How does anyone think cyber works?

's just one of those places I guess. From what I've gathered, 'good in bed' usually transcribes pretty well to 'good on the kitchen floor' or 'good in the backseat of a Toyota'.

 

[Guest]

I get that, CB*, it's just that the bed phrase always rings boring and unimaginative to me.

Perdita

*Cake Bloke

 

[destinie21]

's just one of those places I guess. From what I've gathered, 'good in bed' usually transcribes pretty well to 'good on the kitchen floor' or 'good in the backseat of a Toyota'.

I happen to be good in the front seat of a 2004 escalade and better in the living room.

I'm a tall woman I need space to...
well let's just say I need space.

 

[Guest]

Hey, Dest, I'm not tall but I like tall men, so I need space too, or they do.

Perdita

 

[destinie21]

Hey, Dest, I'm not tall but I like tall men, so I need space too, or they do.

Perdita

that depends on where you are lol since both Renza and I are tall we need to have the space for both of us to be able to um... manuver, but on the plus side hands are a mainstay of on sex life so we can generally get it on anywhere and both get what we're looking for.


PS: when car sex is involved make sure you're at least in park before commencing.

The Mrs whose wife almost got them killed on the way to Atlantic city.

 

[Guest]

PS: when car sex is involved make sure you're at least in park before commencing.
The Mrs whose wife almost got them killed on the way to Atlantic city.

Ah ha ha. I will have fun later (writing a novel at the moment ) trying to picture it, you two hot ones.

cheers, Perdita

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Not only do Hubby and I need lots of space, we are also required to use construction site warning signs, like DON'T DRINK WHILE OPERATING HEAVY MACHINERY and DON'T WALK DIRECTLY UNDER COCK WITHOUT WEARING SAFETY HELMET.

Svenskaflicka
Boasting

 

[destinie21]

Ah ha ha. I will have fun later (writing a novel at the moment ) trying to picture it, you two hot ones.

cheers, Perdita

Here I'll make it easier for you isn't she a doll

 

[Guest]

Here I'll make it easier for you isn't she a doll

As Pops says, yeppers.
__________________
Svenskaflicka wrote:

If you see me in here, please yell at me to haul my butt over to NaNo and continue writing on my story!

 

[Vincent E]

Nothing personal, Gauche, just a rhetorical musing, but why is it always good in bed or better in bed? There are so many other places in/on/against/under/etc. to be good or better.

Suggestions:

Good in the back seat of the car.
Good in the front seat of the car.
Good in the shower.
Good in the basement with the lights turned out.
Good on the back porch.
Good on the front porch.
Good in the hayloft.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a seedy motel.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a seedy nightclub.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a mall.
Good in the attic on the creaking boards.
Good in a phone booth in a rainstorm.
Good in the restroom of an airplane at 30,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane at 40,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane when the pilot turns on the "fasten seatbelt" sign.
Good in the back of a pickup truck that has astro turf laid out.
Good in the elevator of a five star hotel.
Good in the stairwell of the parking garage at work during lunch.
Good in the stairwell of the office building in which you work ten minutes before an important meeting.
Good on the top of your desk with the cleaning lady.
Good on the top of your desk with your boss after she catches you with the cleaning lady.

 

[Vincent E]

Nothing personal, Gauche, just a rhetorical musing, but why is it always good in bed or better in bed? There are so many other places in/on/against/under/etc. to be good or better.

Suggestions:

Good in the back seat of the car.
Good in the front seat of the car.
Good in the shower.
Good in the basement with the lights turned out.
Good on the back porch.
Good on the front porch.
Good in the hayloft.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a seedy motel.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a seedy nightclub.
Good over the hood of the car in the parking lot of a mall.
Good in the attic on the creaking boards.
Good in a phone booth in a rainstorm.
Good in the restroom of an airplane at 30,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane at 40,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane when the pilot turns on the "fasten seatbelt" sign.
Good in the back of a pickup truck that has astro turf laid out.
Good in the elevator of a five star hotel.
Good in the stairwell of the parking garage at work during lunch.
Good in the stairwell of the office building in which you work ten minutes before an important meeting.
Good on the top of your desk with the cleaning lady.
Good on the top of your desk with your boss after she catches you with the cleaning lady.

 

[Guest]

Ah, Vincenzo, you like doubling the fun.

your gal, Perdita

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Good in the restroom of an airplane at 30,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane at 40,000 feet.
Good in the restroom of an airplane when the pilot turns on the "fasten seatbelt" sign.

Anyone who can manage to squeeze TWO people into the teeny-tiny restrooms they have in the airplanes these days, really IS good!

And skinny.

 

[Guest]

Svenskaflicka wrote:

If you see me in here, please yell at me to haul my butt over to NaNo and continue writing on my story!

 

[Icingsugar]

Here I'll make it easier for you isn't she a doll

Thank you. That just about ruined any chance of keeping my mind on the NaNo matter at hand. Now I have to pry the picture of you two raving beauties (I'm blatantly assuming that your AV is you.) out of my head first.

/Ice - might need ice

 

[destinie21]

Since this thread is about LMAO and were talking about sex anyway I thought I'd share another story with you guys. Last week I had a lunchtime quickie and afterwardsI went to an investors meeting. The woman directly across from me kept on looking at me she was clearly scandalized. In any case afterthe meeting I was talking to some of the designers I work with when one of them told me I had lipstick on my collar. LOL Renza wears deep maroon lipstick and damn if I didn't have a clear lipstick imprint on my blouse. I thought it was funny although I may have lost an investor. :O

 

[Icingsugar]

Good in a phone booth in a rainstorm.

Nice one. I spot a plot bunny.

Also:
Good against a downtown lamp-post at 4 in the morning when you just cant find a single cab to take you to that damn bed.