Lit debate of the evening (and how some famous people may have replied)

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Why Did The Chicken Cross the Road?



- JERRY FALWELL Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side."

That's what "they" call it the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

- DR. SEUSS Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!

- ERNEST HEMINGWAY To die. In the rain.

- MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR. I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

- GRANDPA In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

- ARISTOTLE It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

- KARL MARX It was a historical inevitability.

- SADDAM HUSSAIN This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

- RONALD REAGAN What chicken?


- CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

- FOX MULDER You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

- FREUD The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

- BILL GATES I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

- EINSTEIN Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

- BILL CLINTON I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by "chicken"? Could you define "chicken" please?

- GEORGE W. BUSH I don't think I should have to answer that question.

- LOUIS FARRAKHAN The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

- THE BIBLE And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

- COLONEL SANDERS I missed one?
 
LMAO

Great stuff :)

Especially the one with Fox Mulder and Bill Gates
 
Re: Re: Lit debate of the evening (and how some famous people may have replied)

Dixon Carter Lee said:


This tells you how long this has been circling on the Internet.
dont worry he will send you a gift certificate to the GAP, Cracker Barrel, and the Red Cross for fowarding it.
 
I've posted that email before and it always cracks me up.

However, you missed one of my favorites...

Why did the chicken cross the road??


PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
 
I didn't think that the chicken ever got to the "other side", 18 wheelers and all!
 
To see his friend Gregory peck....

Boom, boom, boom.... pah....
 
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