Lit chat.....

[islandman]

So, I went to see what the hubbub was about, and lo and behold, it asked me to log in!

But then the wheels came off the beast.

First, my 'islandman' name has been registered by someone else, likely for the purposes of besmirching my good name and my membership into the Upright Citizens Brigade (non-theatre-related);

Second, it took me an entire five minutes to come up with a new name;

Third, it's been 36 seconds and I have yet to receive a registration confirmation email;

Fourth, 23 seconds after that I received an email from chat-user 'Islandman' asking me why I would seek to abscond with his chat-name. (this part may or may not be true);

And, fifth, the dog needs to go out, but it's cold and wet out there and I don't want to go with her (this part very well could be true).



WTF!, I say.

 

[thør]

WTF!, I say.

But more importantly, were you able to get off?

 

[islandman]

Update 1:

I decided to let the dog out by herself into the backyard to do her thing. No sense in both of us getting cold.

Anywho, still no registration confirmation email, so, on a lark, I decided to try my next credentials and wouldn't you know it, I'm actually in Lit. chat!

Now that I'm here, I figure I should dedicate this computer exclusively to chat as I never want to lose my place in Lit. chat.

But I have to tell you, things are moving at a mile a minute in there. Reminds me why chat is often frustrating.

But now that I'm here, in for a penny, in for a pound.

 

[islandman]

But more importantly, were you able to get off?

Not yet, but I just got a pop-up saying "the connection to the server has been lost. Try reloading the application."

Methinks my foray into chat just met with a sudden and unexpected demise.

 

[Laurel]

You broke it!

 

[parodyluvr75]

Please take the dog out or she'll pee on the rug.

 

[islandman]

You broke it!

It's back up and I'm now in a room titled "masturbate".

Though I'm unsure whether there's a protocol in place by which we pair off and go do our own thing or if it's more of a group situation.

 

[Laurel]

That's why cat rule btw. No going out to rain & ice for potty walks.

 

[Laurel]

It's back up and I'm now in a room titled "masturbate".

Though I'm unsure whether there's a protocol in place by which we pair off and go do our own thing or if it's more of a group situation.

Whichever, so long as it's done furiously and with gusto.

 

[islandman]

Update 2:

Room "masturbate" evidently consists of guys stating when they're starting or stopping their masturbating, with a random, few "I'm still edging" thrown in to spice things up.

In case anyone was wondering.

 

[yossi]

You broke it!

Forward all chat grumbling PMs from now on to iman. Whoever touched it last is responsible.

 

[islandman]

Forward all chat grumbling PMs from now on to iman. Whoever touched it last is responsible.

The fun I could have in answering those!!!!

 

[Laurel]

Update 2:

Room "masturbate" evidently consists of guys stating when they're starting or stopping their masturbating, with a random, few "I'm still edging" thrown in to spice things up.

In case anyone was wondering.

I wasn't, but I'm glad you told us.

Have you started complaining about the forums and demanding someone in chat fix stuff? It's only fair.

Forward all chat grumbling PMs from now on to iman. Whoever touched it last is responsible.

True!!

 

[JohnnySavage]

I wasn't, but I'm glad you told us.

Have you started complaining about the forums and demanding someone in chat fix stuff? It's only fair.



True!!

Do you go in chat to keep an eye on things, like you do here?

I'm just wondering if Laurel is omnipresent.

 

[islandman]

I wasn't, but I'm glad you told us.

Have you started complaining about the forums and demanding someone in chat fix stuff? It's only fair.

I'll actually in the process of starting a room titled "The General Board - wtf is up with those dbags?"

 

[Laurel]

Do you go in chat to keep an eye on things, like you do here?

I'm just wondering if Laurel is omnipresent.

I am.

And I'm everywhere too.

 

[Laurel]

http://literotica.com/chat/

folks

 

[islandman]

Update 3:

So, I've created a room in which chatters can complain about the GeeBee and its residents, but no one seems willing to come chat.

 

[Laurel]

It's just me and Iman

Come on people

 

[Phelia]

I want to play! But only if I can be islandman.

 

[Laurel]

Yay people are in now

 

[Laurel]

Crap, booted

 

[Sean]

The connection to the server, blah, blah, blah.

 

[thør]

An old classic

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?

Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?

Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.

Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?

Wellhung: OK.

Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.

Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.

Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.

Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.

Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.

Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.

Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.

Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.

Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.

Wellhung: I'll pay for it.

Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra.My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.

Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?

Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.

Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.

Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.

Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!

Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.

Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.

Sweetheart: What?

Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.

Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.

Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.

Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.

Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!

Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.

Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.

Sweetheart: What's the matter?

Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.

Sweetheart: Are you OK?

Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.

Sweetheart: Can I help?

Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?

Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.

Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.

Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.

Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.

Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.

Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?

Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.

Wellhung: I found it.

Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.

Wellhung: Me too.

Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately - our naked bodies pressing each other.

Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.

Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?

Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.

Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!

Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.

Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.

Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.

Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.

Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!

Sweetheart: What's the matter now?

Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.

Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.

Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.

Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!

Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.

Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!

Wellhung: I'm flaccid.

Sweetheart: What?

Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.

Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.

Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.

Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.

Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray,picture frames and your candles.

Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.

Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.

Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!

Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!

Sweetheart: { [logged off]

 

[Phelia]

It Lives! So Many Noises! So Many Names That Include The Word "boner"!