Life as a Ninja is hard.

[SweetWitch]

Sucks to be him

SEATTLE -Seattle police say a man who thought he was ninja was impaled on a metal fence when he tried to leap over it. An officer who was looking for an assault victim nearby Monday night heard the man screaming for help. Police supported him to prevent further injuries until medics arrived and took him to a hospital, where he was in serious condition in intensive care on Tuesday.

Police spokeswoman Renee Witt wrote in a department Web site posting that officers thought the man might have been involved in the reported assault, but he insisted he was just a ninja trying to clear a 4- to 5-foot-tall fence.
Witt says the man was "overconfident in his abilities," and that alcohol likely played a role.

His name was not released

I wouldn't want my name released either.

 

[TE999]

S'pears he was a noneja.

 

[SeaCat]

Bwahahahahahahaha

When I worked for an Ambulance Company we had a guy working there who was a bit high strung. He was a bit on the strange side.

He would do things like sleep under the rigs while they were in the bays. (The rest of us slept in the rigs.) He was always showing the crew his newest knives and talking about them even though they were cheap pieces of shit.

He was engaged to one of the dispatchers, who was a bit off the edge herself.

A short time after I started working there one of the two dispatchers on duty called us in the bays to say she had seen someone skulking around the aprons. We went out to investigate. (This wasn't unusual. Usually it was a druggie looking for our drug boxes.) We saw someone moving around wearing black. He was darting back and forth from shadowed area to shadowed area as though we couldn't see him. We could even see he had a couple of swords strapped to his back. What in the hell did he think he was?

It was kind of fun watching him making his way to the door. He dropped under a car and rolled out the other side. He slithered over another car then slid behind a pile of Oil Drums. He tripped over damned near everything in the yard but he kept coming. When he came up to the door he settled down to watch the door not seeing the group of us standing there. He got tackled from three different directions even as the first cop car showed up.

It turned out the Ninja was the strange guy. He thought his G/F wasa dating someone else and wanted to see who she was dating. He was released the next day.

He was later arrested and convicted on charges of Assault and Battery with intent for shooting another motorist with a crossbow in a fit of roadrage.

Cat

 

[SweetWitch]

Cat, I love your stories.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Cat, are you sure you don't live in California? http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii177/1volupturary_manque/lol.gif

 

[Dragonlipz]

I had a fellow working for me years back who had a 'black hole' in his resume....during the interview I asked him about it and he told me:
"I'm not going to talk about that period of time. Can we just discuss the pertinent areas of experience?"
We did and I did hire him as a XXXXXXXXXXX - contract engineer for the XXXXXXXXXX project.....
His performance was quite good - as a contractor it was a given - and it wasn't until I took the team on to a titty bar for well-deserved R&R (All personel were given a list of choices and while the male to female ratio was 60 to 40, the titty bar was was an overwhelming majority -[100%] among the female contractors.....so it was decided: the evening was a great success until we left and encountered some gangbangers who wanted some cash (we were fresh out, having expended our reserves on lap dances, etc.....)
They weren't mollified by my admission that we'd squandered the cash on women who were probably their G/F's.........
Gangbanger #1 showed me some heat and the 'black hole dude' went into action: His footprint was firmed planted on the GB#1's chest as he relieved him of his piece and pointed it at the rest of the gang who were trying to grasp the change in status....(they booked ass as the realization of the situation became apparent......)
'Resume black hole dude came to my apartment the next day, gave me the gun, and resigned....
Never saw him again.....
AdventuresinContractEngineering.....

 

[bronzeage]

A real ninja would have gone through the fence.

 

[SweetWitch]

I had a fellow working for me years back who had a 'black hole' in his resume....during the interview I asked him about it and he told me:
"I'm not going to talk about that period of time. Can we just discuss the pertinent areas of experience?"
We did and I did hire him as a XXXXXXXXXXX - contract engineer for the XXXXXXXXXX project.....
His performance was quite good - as a contractor it was a given - and it wasn't until I took the team on to a titty bar for well-deserved R&R (All personel were given a list of choices and while the male to female ratio was 60 to 40, the titty bar was was an overwhelming majority -[100%] among the female contractors.....so it was decided: the evening was a great success until we left and encountered some gangbangers who wanted some cash (we were fresh out, having expended our reserves on lap dances, etc.....)
They weren't mollified by my admission that we'd squandered the cash on women who were probably their G/F's.........
Gangbanger #1 showed me some heat and the 'black hole dude' went into action: His footprint was firmed planted on the GB#1's chest as he relieved him of his piece and pointed it at the rest of the gang who were trying to grasp the change in status....(they booked ass as the realization of the situation became apparent......)
'Resume black hole dude came to my apartment the next day, gave me the gun, and resigned....
Never saw him again.....
AdventuresinContractEngineering.....

Well, hell--you should have given the black hole a raise. Security is always an issue.

 

[SweetWitch]

A real ninja would have gone through the fence.

Or slipped quietly beneath it.

 

[Dragonlipz]

Well, hell--you should have given the black hole a raise. Security is always an issue.

Never saw him again in the flesh - he's working for an outfit called 'BlackFist' now....

 

[R. Richard]

The problem with most 'ninjas' is that they think that reading the book 'Superduper Ninja Secrets' and 20 minutes of practice makes a ninja or whatever. The people who really do Aikido, Karate, Kung-Fu or ninja arts work for years to gain the knowledge. Trying to substitute a book written by a fake for the years of work leads to disaster.

 

[TxRad]

The problem with most 'ninjas' is that they think that reading the book 'Superduper Ninja Secrets' and 20 minutes of practice makes a ninja or whatever. The people who really do Aikido, Karate, Kung-Fu or ninja arts work for years to gain the knowledge. Trying to substitute a book written by a fake for the years of work leads to disaster.

And worse yet are schools that teach the physical arts but ignore the mental disciplines that go along with them. One without the other is dangerous to one and all.

 

[oggbashan]

One of my school rugby teammates had come to our Australian school from a Karate boarding school in SE Asia. He was the smallest in our team, played hooker, but not a person to annoy.

A forward from an opposing team punched our hooker in the face while in the scrum. That is a known foul tactic in rugby.

By the end of the match that forward had a broken arm from an apparently harmless fend-off from our hooker.

Our hooker's hands were edge-hardened from years of daily Karate practice.

Og

 

[R. Richard]

And worse yet are schools that teach the physical arts but ignore the mental disciplines that go along with them. One without the other is dangerous to one and all.

Fortunately, most of the schools that teach only the physical skills are fake. The learning of a martial art is a long, hard process. Most who truly walk the path learn the mental discipline as well.

However, you're correct. I learned most of my kung-fu from a Korean who was wanted by the police in at least most of the major cities in the world. He knew some of the physical skills and none of the ethical skills.

 

[R. Richard]

One of my school rugby teammates had come to our Australian school from a Karate boarding school in SE Asia. He was the smallest in our team, played hooker, but not a person to annoy.

A forward from an opposing team punched our hooker in the face while in the scrum. That is a known foul tactic in rugby.

By the end of the match that forward had a broken arm from an apparently harmless fend-off from our hooker.

Our hooker's hands were edge-hardened from years of daily Karate practice.

Og

I was working out in a Karate dojo when I was paired with a new student. The guy was a troublemaker and tried a full force strike on me while we worked on a technique. I saw it coming and thew myself back and avoided most of the force of the strike. I was going to kill the son-of-a bitch. However, the blackbelt instructor stopped me and then set up a sequence of sparring matches. The instructor pair himself with trouble maker. By the end of the 'sparring session,' the instructor had to help troublemaker off the mat. The troublemaker never came back.

 

[cloudy]

Spawn got his black belt in tai kwan do at the age of twelve.

Youngest savage is four belts away from his black in Okinawan karate, and he's nine.

I found with both boys that studying martial arts helped their focus and determination in all other areas of life, including their school work, and their self-confidence is wonderful to see.