Librarians

[SimonDoom]

fuck that, the glasses STAY ON

If you want the glasses off, you're not a REAL librarian fan.

 

[NuclearFairy]

The most memorable librarian I've ever known, was the head librarian in a very small town. She was a little old lady, with lots of energy, and short dyed hair(usually some shade of purple or blue, but it was pink a couple of times, and green once). She was very friendly and helpful, kept offering to let us into the backroom to look at the archives, and I swear she was the head of a coven of witches. See, she always had this notebook open with all kinds of symbols and meeting notes in it.

 

[AlexBailey]

I love it when I bring a book to a librarian to check out, and they get so excited because it's one of their favorite books. If it's by an author I love, I really enjoy geeking out about the author's other works with them. Only had it happen a couple times, but by God it's a wonderful feeling.

I remember my librarian grandmother geeking out about some of the famous signatures on the sign-out cards.

Mayors, congressman, governors, authors…

 

[SimonDoom]

When I was in high school, my best friend and I liked to prank the librarian by making up fake library cards for fake books, invariably about X-rated and totally unacceptable subjects like pedophilia and Southeast Asian male prostitutes and the like, and we would insert them into the card catalog so she would find them. Fortunately, she had a great sense of humor and thought they were hilarious.

 

[KittyOfSteele]

Oh, hello! A thread about librarians? Don't mind if I'm entitled to say a few personal things...

The only thing that I'm tired of are the stories where they portray us as annoying old ladies. A lot of us are big introverts, that's why we like books! And just because I have a big fetish for neckties doesn't mean you get a free pass to touch it. This is my sanctuary!

Also, books are heavy, so we are generally pretty strong.

Last but not least, glasses look good on everyone.

Pawed with love, your friendly local kitty librarian.

 

[TheWritingGroup]

I'm fond of the stories where librarians turn out to have secret knowledge from reading all those books.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

I got close to a shush of librarians once.
It's very rare to see them in groups, in the wild.
Of course, they ran away when I got too close.

Fixed that for you!

 

[EmilyMiller]

Librarians, stereotypes, archetypes, cliches and tropes. What are they? What are your favorites? Which ones are annoying?

Being able to handle an SMG?

—

Juliana finished slotting her last shell into the drum and was about to return fire when a single shot rang out, followed by a cry of pain. Ahead of them, Mike was gripping his thigh in agony. Cara was turning back to see what had happened.

For Evie, everything slowed down. She spied two men, who had somehow circled around behind them, rush from the chamber’s entrance way. She saw their weapons move to cover Cara. She even saw their trigger fingers begin to squeeze…

And then they both fell, their flesh rent asunder by bursts of automatic gunfire. Evie looked at Juliana, assuming that the older woman had acted, but the archaeologist’s gun was still pointed the other way. Evie’s SMG felt warm in her hands and suddenly reality hit her. It hit Evie so hard that her consciousness couldn’t cope and all went black.

 

[Bamagan]

Fixed that for you!

I also like 'a binding' for their collective noun.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

I also like 'a binding' for their collective noun.

Also a ‘classification’, a ‘stack’, a ‘due’, a ‘catalogue’, a ‘folio’ or an ‘errata’ of librarians.

I’ll stick with ‘shush’ in memory of Daisy Baldwin, librarian at my high school, may she rest in perfect stillness.

 

[BeechLeaf]

The webcomic Questionable Content has plenty of librarians (and if you don't know QC, why are you wasting your time here instead of reading it?). Here's Claire exerting her powers - and if the picture gets yanked, it's QC comic number 3079,

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Once upon a time, I ended up giving a lecture at a conference of librarians - they may have called themselves knowledge managers, but they were just geeky librarians.

I got assigned a lovely suite in the posh conference hotel, and had no-one to share it with. Cue an evening doing a bar quiz with the filthiest bunch of braniacs ever, and some propositions. If I hadn't had too many of my own colleagues watching, and I'd been braver, it might have been a much more interesting night worthy of Lit - certainly I heard some good gossip the next morning about people if never met before! My stories about filthy scientists are partly based on that lot.

When I was a teenager I hung out at the local library a lot. The librarians were not sheltered but were over 50, so when they were tasked with acquiring some of these new CD things for people to rent, to attract Local Youth with modern music, their solution was to give me cash and ask me to buy some. They did the same with a student lad, with the result that our Home Counties town had the best heavy metal collection in the country! The lad and I never got beyond approving nods at each other - we were too young and shy to go further.

Libraries in universities may also have barely-used sections. When I was an undergrad, almost everything science students needed was in departments, mostly journals, so the science sections of the uni library were rarely visited. To the point that when I did, about a dozen times for a specific book for my thesis, half the time I tripped over a pair of students shagging. The librarians knew to cough loudly, apparently...

I've only written one Lit scene in a library.

 

[KittyOfSteele]

I'm fond of the stories where librarians turn out to have secret knowledge from reading all those books.

That is not fiction at all, though to be quite honest, I've had this reputation long before becoming a librarian.

 

[jsmiam]

It just dawned on me, surprising me that the thought didn’t even pop into my head earlier: my mother was a librarian, of sorts. It was a specialty library for a specific type of business, so not exactly the type of library associated with all the stereotypes. But library was part of the name of the place, and I’m pretty sure her title includes the word librarian.

Good thing this is Literotica, I suppose.

At least she wasn’t also an English tea….

Oh crap.

 

[dirk2024]

It just dawned on me, surprising me that the thought didn’t even pop into my head earlier: my mother was a librarian, of sorts. It was a specialty library for a specific type of business, so not exactly the type of library associated with all the stereotypes. But library was part of the name of the place, and I’m pretty sure her title includes the word librarian.

Good thing this is Literotica, I suppose.

At least she wasn’t also an English tea….

Oh crap.

Oh, My Mommy the Librarian. It practically writes itself.

Hmmm...

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Oh, My Mommy the Librarian. It practically writes itself.

Hmmm...

Don't say that! Mom has a Masters in Librarianship... I spent a lot of my childhood in the stacks of rare book libraries.

 

[dirk2024]

Don't say that! Mom has a Masters in Librarianship... I spent a lot of my childhood in the stacks of rare book libraries.

Mom also has a Mistess Degree in domming. Son wants to tickle his fingers through her card catalog.

 

[KittyOfSteele]

You motherfuckers need to stop discussing and start writing about your dommy mommy librarian.

Oh, don't look at me like that. This is the place where all of us with mommy and daddy issues gather!

 

[Bamagan]

You motherfuckers need to stop discussing and start writing about your dommy mommy librarian.

Oh, don't look at me like that. This is the place where all of us with mommy and daddy issues gather!

Among the archaic words for a library is the term 'book hoard'.

I therefore recommend the title Book Whored.

 

[Voboy]

I wrote a story about a librarian once. It turned out well. But she was an atypical librarian.

I'll say that I married a librarian and therefore know several, so the "stereotype" doesn't really work for me.

 

[NuclearFairy]

Among the archaic words for a library is the term 'book hoard'.

I therefore recommend the title Book Whored.

Ooor, dragon's paper hoard?

 

[KittyOfSteele]

Among the archaic words for a library is the term 'book hoard'.

I therefore recommend the title Book Whored.

Book Whored? That's Henry Spencer Ashbee. Or me either building up my collection of eroticas, or after reading Diario de Burdel.

I do plan on making a sonnet for International Book Day next month. And I'm going to yoink this imagery out of you.

 

[Belegon]

I definitely like the sexy librarian trope. *shrug* I don't mind leaning in to things I like...

But for me, any memories about a library always flash me back to college, working the front desk... and a very attractive, tall slender redhead who came in when I was working... and, unknown to me, had been admiring me from a distance for awhile and then gotten "tipped off" that I was working that night, by myself. To skip ahead, Cat and I were boyfriend/girlfriend for about three months after that night... lets just say she had laid her plans and they were successful.

 

[wwot40]

I definitely like the sexy librarian trope. *shrug* I don't mind leaning in to things I like...

But for me, any memories about a library always flash me back to college, working the front desk... and a very attractive, tall slender redhead who came in when I was working... and, unknown to me, had been admiring me from a distance for awhile and then gotten "tipped off" that I was working that night, by myself. To skip ahead, Cat and I were boyfirend/girlfriend for about three months after that night... lets just say she had laid her plans and they were successful.

Sounds like the beginning of a story here.....

 

[jsmiam]

Oh, My Mommy the Librarian. It practically writes itself.

Hmmm...

Fine. Next authors challenge people can can be about her. But wait. It’s not incest when it’s someone else’s mom is it? Ok, someone else, offer up your mom for me, nurses, doctors, or lady cop moms preferred though. ;-)