Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

[juicylips]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?

I know no one wants to hear the dreaded "let's just be friends", but what if that is really the only option?

How have you ended relationships like this?

Cassidy

 

[MissTaken]

Yes. They are the most difficult relationships to end as there is no heinous, concrete reason why.

Have you wished that He/She would just really fuck up so that you could kick them out? Egads!

There are no right answers without knowing more, but certainly you could consider saying that it just isn't working out.



Take care and be well.

 

[Pokerman]

Forget the 'lets be friends' line...

Just tell them, "I don't think this is going to work out. We're just too different." or something...

 

[MidnightAngel]

If the other person feels the same way, it's not too difficult to say "let's be friends" and then be friends. But if they care more about you than you do about them, then it never seems to work out (being friends).

Oh Yeah, Been there. Usually, I end up being called a cold-hearted bitch (Hmmm...I'm not sure that's an insult to me. ).

But you have to do what's best for yourself; cause in the end, you're the only person who has to live with you 24/7.

 

[Summery]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?
You just tell them! Sorry, it's over.....it's just not working out. Then list the reasons if needed. IMO, the other person is entitled to know why.

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?
Most of the time I would say no. Somehow, someone always gets hurt.....feelings bruised.

I know no one wants to hear the dreaded "let's just be friends", but what if that is really the only option?
If it's the only option, then what more is there to say?

How have you ended relationships like this?
Yes! And, it didn't go over well, feelings were hurt, but in time, that person eventually did become.......just my friend.

That's the best I can come up with. It's early still! Welcome back Cass, are you glad to be home?

 

[MissTaken]

Orrrrrrrrrr


If He doesn't know about lit, let him read a few posts!


Yep! That oughta do it!

 

[Scabbers]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?

With a kick in the arse (sometimes giving, sometimes receiving).

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?

No, so why bother?

I know no one wants to hear the dreaded "let's just be friends", but what if that is really the only option?

I don't want to be friends now--it's too late for that.

How have you ended relationships like this?

Badly.

 

[juicylips]

Re: Re: Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

[QUOTE
That's the best I can come up with. It's early still! Welcome back Cass, are you glad to be home?

Very glad to be back on east coast time, that's for sure! My body just never adjusted to the west coast clock.

Although it was nice being on the same time with you for a change. Now, if I would have just stayed away from the Smirnoff I might have remembered more!!

Cassidy

 

[alltherage]

I guess shooting him is not an option huh.

Damned if I know. I do know that the longer a person waits the harder it is to do. If you want to be friends offer friendship. It is corny but if its what you want don't not do it because it sounds funky.

If you want to be free of the person that needs to get said. Directly. There are no easy ways of telling bad news to someone.
Faster started, faster finished. Good Luck.

 

[s1ng2m3]

"My baby left me and my mule got lame.
Lost my money in a poker game.
A windstorm came just the other day
And blew the house down I lived in away.
I'm getting so much trouble
Sooo much trouble...
So much trouble, I'm about to lose my mind."

That could happen. Or this could happen:

"I'll forget you, I will-
While yet, you are here,
burning inside my brain....
Romance is mush. Stifling
those who strive...
I'll live a lush life
in some small dive
and there I'll be while I rot with the rest
of those whose lives are lonely too."

Either way, it certainly beats this:

"About them bucks I owe you?
Send a bill to my manager.
He'll send it to my accountant
who'll send it to my lawyer
who'll send it back to you.
I got a system working."

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

Hurting one person is better then hurting many people

so tell them right out your feelings or your hurting yourself being with someone you don't want and your huting them by not loveing them like they deserve.

so if i were to end a relationship i'd tell them, I don't see us going any fearther then we are now it's time to move on.

But if it were posible yes i'd want to stay friends with them.

 

[Tim1]

how bout

Maybe just being honest and saying ...hey listen, this isn't working out and leave. Don't give long drawn out explanations (They never work). And don't use the "lets be friends" line. Most times you don't want to be friends anyway.

 

[Aphrodisiac]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?

I know no one wants to hear the dreaded "let's just be friends", but what if that is really the only option?

How have you ended relationships like this?

Cassidy

Hmmm ...

I simply stop taking his calls ...

No ... but really I just tell them the truth. I will tell him the reasons why I think the " relationship" is a dead end. I will point out our differences ... etc....

 

[lobito]

I once heard a line, perhaps some fo you remember it too.

"They say that breaking up is, hard to do..." Damnit! Now that songs in my head for the whole freakin day!

I tried the whole hoping we can still be friends one time, it doesn't work as well in real life as you want it to in real life. I was told, blah blah blah, let's just be friends, we're better that way with each other. Well, we rarely talked after that, through NO fault of my own.

As was already pointed out, if someone says let's be freinds, then BE friends. People don't like being bullshitted around.

 

[Wiggles]

I think I'm usually the one on the other end of it.
Never notice when the relationship has started to go down hill.
I'm always willing to try to make it work. But I'm just lazy, I don't want to have to break in yet another bf! j/k.
The only good ending I've ever had to a relationship is where we just stopped talking. It wasn't really that serious anyway.

I don't think there really is any good way to do it w/out hurting feelings. I think there should be little cards the ex could fill out.
A little "Why am I such a bad gf/bf" questionaire. Because it really should be a learning xp. Ya know?

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?

Be honest as to your feelings and the reasons why - then at least both persons can learn from the experience and not wonder what went wrong.

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?

Usually not, but there are ways to minimize hurt feelings; be nice, be honest but tactful, be caring, do not drag it out.

 

[Fly_On_Wall]

hay Welcom back from your hiatus Shy Tall Guy.

 

[Summery]

hay Welcom back from your hiatus Shy Tall Guy.

FLY you beat me to it! Good to see you post STG.

 

[BigDawg69]

I always liked the Dangerous Liasons method that worked so evil for John Malkovich:

It's simply beyond my control." Over and over again.

 

[Hamletmaschine]

Re: Re: Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

Hmmm ...

I simply stop taking his calls ...

No ... but really I just tell them the truth. I will tell him the reasons why I think the " relationship" is a dead end. I will point out our differences ... etc....

Wish you'd been my last lover, Aphrodisiac - LOL

I think honesty is the best policy here (as opposed to the 'ignore it 'til it goes away' approach). I've never had a problem ending a relationship--whether it was her or me who was doing the 'ending'--so long as it was done openly and honestly.

And the 'let's be friends' line doesn't have to be such a bad thing. (Although it's probably best not to use it as your opening line....) I, too, have had former lovers who have remained good friends.

~H~

 

[tn_8tiv]

How do you end a relationship that is going nowhere?

Is there a way to avoid hurt feelings?

I know no one wants to hear the dreaded "let's just be friends", but what if that is really the only option?

How have you ended relationships like this?

Cassidy

Cass, Just end it. It's best for both parties that way...

DO NOT KEEP THEM HANGING ON!

And, if you've been serious (like having sex), friends is out of the question.

At least for me

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

FLY you beat me to it! Good to see you post STG.

Fly, Rose, thank you.

 

[Hamletmaschine]

Re: Re: Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

Cass, Just end it. It's best for both parties that way...

DO NOT KEEP THEM HANGING ON!

And, if you've been serious (like having sex), friends is out of the question.

At least for me

I agree with most of this, TN--but I disagree on the 'sex means no friends' part. Had a 3-yr. relationship with a woman, stayed friends, and even got together as 'fuck-buddies' (her term) a couple of times a year for 3 more years. We're still friends (but not 'fuck-buddies').

~H~

 

[tn_8tiv]

Re: Re: Re: Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

I agree with most of this, TN--but I disagree on the 'sex means no friends' part. Had a 3-yr. relationship with a woman, stayed friends, and even got together as 'fuck-buddies' (her term) a couple of times a year for 3 more years. We're still friends (but not 'fuck-buddies').

~H~

That's great Hamlet that you could still remain friends. But I wonder, if you still get together for sex, have you really ended the relationship?

 

[Hamletmaschine]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Let's Just Kiss & Say Goodbye

((Cut))

I wonder, if you still get together for sex, have you really ended the relationship?

Well, as I said, we've stopped getting together for sex now. But, even when we did, I do think the relationship was over--IF by relationship we mean the hope/promise of something lasting and 'permanent', exclusivity, something that develops and deepens over time, etc.

We just got along very well sexually, even though we both had decided that we didn't want to continue to develop the relationship.

~H~