Legality

[DueSteele]

Greetings all, My name is Matt and I am a dom with a new sub, she is concerned with public displays of control, ie: Collar and leash. I know that it varies from municipal code to municipul code. But can anyone tell if their are any federals law vis-a-vis domming in public. I say it is legal because we are both legal and constenting adults. Any info(websites, articles) is more the welcome, and thank you

 

[catalina_francisco]

Without knowing where you are, people are up against it in terms of advising you to local laws etc. That being said, there are some of us who believe that public display is not necessary to be able to dominate 24/7, nor is it considerate when inflicting your choices on others by forcing them to witness things which perhaps should remain private and to which they have not been given the opportunity to consent or not. In my world, D/s is not about showing off and going out in public to shock and/or demonstrate our personal choices to others, it is about living it 24/7, respectfully and authentically for us, no-one else.

Catalina

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

Without knowing where you are, people are up against it in terms of advising you to local laws etc. That being said, there are some of us who believe that public display is not necessary to be able to dominate 24/7, nor is it considerate when inflicting your choices on others by forcing them to witness things which perhaps should remain private and to which they have not been given the opportunity to consent or not. In my world, D/s is not about showing off and going out in public to shock and/or demonstrate our personal choices to others, it is about living it 24/7, respectfully and authentically for us, no-one else.

Catalina

Exactly.

Plus, to me it is a lot more special to have her wear something around her neck that to everyone else is just another necklace, but to you and her means so much more.

 

[twysted73]

Or perhaps a simple/decorative cat collar around her wrist?

Maybe a choice color of ribbon around her neck/wrist/ankle.

So many other possabilites rather then "in your face".
Would that not be more enjoyable to her in a setting such as a play club or getogether where you both could enjoy it openly?

 

[Daddy2mylilgirl]

Just cause it's legal doesn't mean it's the right thing to do.

 

[shy slave]

I am guessing the OP is in the US but it would have been helpful if they had put where they were, as legal issues vary across the world.

Not everyone lives and dies by the US legal or morality code, some of us live in other parts of the world.


OK, I admit I am grumpy tonight....

 

[Pure]

?

i am not sure what a public display of control is. having the sub, with a collar, on a leash? having the sub with a big fucking collar, as in dungeon type? whipping her (on the sidewalk, in a club)?

i suspect that if you grab her hair, in a public park, and drag her into the bushes, with her screaming and resisting, you might come to the attention of the authorities.

i suppose you could make a sign for her back, saying, "Joe, next to me, owns me and makes me suck his and all his friends' cocks."

not sure what response you're after, but that would get you one.

 

[EmpressFi]

Might need to look into your local municipality as .. and I could be wrong, I probably am.. but I dont think you can legally consent to assault. You can refuse to press charges..but if you "dominate" in public you do risk legal ramifications, even if they do consent.

But I'm with the others. I wear a small silver necklace every day. My submission isnt signified by a big collar and a leash, pushing ito into the face of people who might not want to know

 

[His_pita]

Might need to look into your local municipality as .. and I could be wrong, I probably am.. but I dont think you can legally consent to assault. You can refuse to press charges..but if you "dominate" in public you do risk legal ramifications, even if they do consent.

There are many states where it doesn't matter if you press charges or not. If the police are called for any reason they often have the authority to arrest and press charges no matter what you might have to say about it.

I also stand very firm that because I give consent for my Sir to do with me as we have agreed upon, the general public did not agree to witness unusual behavior, such as being led around on a leash. Keep it at home or in the proper venue where no one cares what you do.

 

[Etoile]

Weren't there those guys in the UK or somewhere who were arrested for doing a scene in someone's home, and the bottom was arrested too because you cannot legally consent to your own assault?

I forget where that was, but I'm sure places in the US have the same rule.

 

[Pure]

note to etoile,

as i read duesteel, his is asking about *municipal laws* that might affect leashes and the like.

laws about assault are state laws, mostly, though some federal laws apply. munipalities would not be involved.

the case you are thinking of is the "Spanner case" in Britain where gay SM persons doing some hard needle play (through cock and balls) etc., were convicted of assault, upheld in the House of Lords, the highest court, in 1993. decision reproduced at the url below; also the European Human Rights decision.

http://alternate.com/downloads/pc/Laskey.txt

SM folks carrying on the crusade against treating SM as assault, see,

http://www.unfettered.co.uk/bdsmrights/spanner

not just in Britain, but in the US (by state law), you cannot--with a few explicit exceptions like boxing-- consent to major bodily harm.

 

[Chicklet]

If I saw you in the streets leading your sub by a collar and leash, I would think less of you. It is my personal opinion that it is corny, and offensive to too many people.

I am an active member of the local community in my area, and I would advise any of my friends not to do something like that. It seems childish, and is something that I think aids peoples poor opinion of kinky folk.

 

[Primalex]

If I saw you in the streets leading your sub by a collar and leash, I would think less of you. It is my personal opinion that it is corny, and offensive to too many people.

I am an active member of the local community in my area, and I would advise any of my friends not to do something like that. It seems childish, and is something that I think aids peoples poor opinion of kinky folk.

Would you recommend that a gay couple does not kiss in the public, because it is corny and offensive to too many people?

 

[Chicklet]

Would you recommend that a gay couple does not kiss in the public, because it is corny and offensive to too many people?

BDSM is not defined by wearing a leather collar and leading your lover around by a leash. Homosexuality is defined by having affection for the same sex.

And I don't think kissing is corny.

When I see people leading their bottoms around on leashes, it makes them look extremely immature and childish.

edited to add that I am the leader of the local under 30 chapter in my city, and I feel like a quarter of my responsibility is helping younger kinky people realize that it's not cool to actually look dumb and immature to the public eye and give BDSM a bad name.

 

[EmpressFi]

There was also the case of the couple in the UK being kicked off the bus for him leading around his submissive by leash and collar... though again, that's not municipality

 

[BiBunny]

When I see people leading their bottoms around on leashes, it makes them look extremely immature and childish.

I agree. It makes you look like something akin to a teenager who dresses in outlandish clothing or wears weird hairstyles just to get noticed. And then, of course, those are the people who are the first ones to go crazy if the attention they get is negative. Errr, what did you expect again?

 

[EmpressFi]

I agree. It makes you look like something akin to a teenager who dresses in outlandish clothing or wears weird hairstyles just to get noticed. And then, of course, those are the people who are the first ones to go crazy if the attention they get is negative. Errr, what did you expect again?

of course then there are those who believe that any attention is good attention and will create it if the cant get it any other way

 

[BiBunny]

of course then there are those who believe that any attention is good attention and will create it if the cant get it any other way

Yep, there's that, too. Something along the lines of "there's no such thing as bad publicity," I guess.

 

[Primalex]

BDSM is not defined by wearing a leather collar and leading your lover around by a leash. Homosexuality is defined by having affection for the same sex.

You are dodging.

Homosexuality is not defined by kissing in the public, so you could as easily limit their affection to the bedroom. Why don't you? Because you will look like an old hag if you would say such an outdated thing. And why is this? Because there are a lot of people who accept the gay lifestyle. And why is this? Because they DID show it in the public even during the times where it was not accepted, they did face prosecution for their lifestyle. And they DID go to jail or face other punishments, they DID fight for their right to live the way they want.

And you? You hide behind your rock like a cockroach.

edited to add that I am the leader of the local under 30 chapter in my city, and I feel like a quarter of my responsibility is helping younger kinky people realize that it's not cool to actually look dumb and immature to the public eye and give BDSM a bad name.

This is disgusting. It's one thing to explain possible consequences, another thing to indoctrinate people how they have to live.

 

[Chicklet]

You are dodging.

Dodging? no...

You're obviously extremely anal, or looking for a fight, which frankly I'm not at all interested in giving you.

I have a real BDSM community full of people who will give me plenty of drama while we're trying to organize a weekend of events with nine different groups who all want the same time slot. Why should I worry about you?

 

[Chicklet]

Yep, there's that, too. Something along the lines of "there's no such thing as bad publicity," I guess.

They aren't necessarily BDSM'ers - the word is Exhibitionist = )

(And yes, there are exhibitionists within bdsm, but there are exhibitionists who don't know shit about bdsm who do that sort of thing for the attention)

 

[Adakgirl]

I see why she is concerned. It is much more advisable to practice public displays of control in private places where that control is understood and accepted like at clubs and play parties. To display your control over your pyl in public vanilla arena should not be that necessary or important to you. Are you unsure of your control and feel the to show it off as some kind of proof, validation of power perhaps?

Are you wanting to show it off because you are so proud of it? Only like minded people who have made this lifestyle choice will understand that pride, only they can recognize it for what it is. The only person you need to validate it with is your pyl and the only person you need to prove it to is yourself.

 

[Domwoolf]

bdsm and the law

Greetings all, My name is Matt and I am a dom with a new sub, she is concerned with public displays of control, ie: Collar and leash. I know that it varies from municipal code to municipul code. But can anyone tell if their are any federals law vis-a-vis domming in public. I say it is legal because we are both legal and constenting adults. Any info(websites, articles) is more the welcome, and thank you

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