Late night wondering

[cherise97camaro]

I wonder about so many things...
I wonder why something as simple as being horny can bring about such utter sadness.
I wonder why someone you love so deeply can be the poison pill to crush you so completely.
I wonder why friends lack the ability or desire to come along side you and lift you through things when circumstances seem poised to overtake you.
I wonder why the group of people who desire your time when you're horny are so different from the group that desires your presence when you need someone.
I wonder how someone can tell you for eight years that you are the love of his life, and leave you in the next moment.
I wonder how someone witness years of your most vulnerable expressions of total and complete love and devotion, and dismiss them so easily in a mere moment.
I wonder if I can ever be satisfied that I've truly found someone who won't do that to me again.
I wonder what's so wrong with me that someone would throw me away.
I wonder what I could do to fix whatever is so bad about me.
I wonder if it's really worth wondering.

 

[KindofHere]

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[Likes_Them_Kinky]

I wonder about so many things...
I wonder why something as simple as being horny can bring about such utter sadness.
I wonder why someone you love so deeply can be the poison pill to crush you so completely.
I wonder why friends lack the ability or desire to come along side you and lift you through things when circumstances seem poised to overtake you.
I wonder why the group of people who desire your time when you're horny are so different from the group that desires your presence when you need someone.
I wonder how someone can tell you for eight years that you are the love of his life, and leave you in the next moment.
I wonder how someone witness years of your most vulnerable expressions of total and complete love and devotion, and dismiss them so easily in a mere moment.
I wonder if I can ever be satisfied that I've truly found someone who won't do that to me again.
I wonder what's so wrong with me that someone would throw me away.
I wonder what I could do to fix whatever is so bad about me.
I wonder if it's really worth wondering.

I wonder.... how you're doing.
I wonder... how you're coping.
I wonder... when we'll see you smile again.

 

[plesmore]

I wonder about so many things...
I wonder why something as simple as being horny can bring about such utter sadness.
I wonder why someone you love so deeply can be the poison pill to crush you so completely.
I wonder why friends lack the ability or desire to come along side you and lift you through things when circumstances seem poised to overtake you.
I wonder why the group of people who desire your time when you're horny are so different from the group that desires your presence when you need someone.
I wonder how someone can tell you for eight years that you are the love of his life, and leave you in the next moment.
I wonder how someone witness years of your most vulnerable expressions of total and complete love and devotion, and dismiss them so easily in a mere moment.
I wonder if I can ever be satisfied that I've truly found someone who won't do that to me again.
I wonder what's so wrong with me that someone would throw me away.
I wonder what I could do to fix whatever is so bad about me.
I wonder if it's really worth wondering.

Someone once told me that "life is like riding a train through a tunnel - it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel if you stick your head out the window and get it ripped off."
I have no idea what that means. There are many things that don't make and much sense and never will. When I get melancholy I try to remember that when people do what the hell they want it is not a reflection on who I am. Guess this isn't very helpful, but ...

 

[cherise97camaro]

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I'm glad you edited your answer. I held back a long time before writing my reply to your answer, and I held back because I knew I couldn't answer your post without feeling bad about it afterwards. You let us both save face. thank you.

 

[Livelifetofullesy]

sounds like the utter distress I have felt myself in a few times over the course of my life. As you well know it always gers better, each day getting easier with a set back or two along the way. Take action for yourself in yourself. Immerse yourself in something new or rekindle s passion of old. but do not be complacent. Inaction will let the wondering continue and fester. Be well and focus on the good....

 

[puffinpenguin]

Love and hate are 2 sides of the same coin. We can only really, truly hate those we love (or loved) because they are the ones who have the power to really hurt us. That's part of loving, isn't it? To be open and vulnerable to someone else, while they are open and vulnerable to us.

I am sorry that you're wondering about these questions; they stem from a very dark and lonely place. But friends who aren't there when you really need them aren't really friends, the world is a big place and there will always be someone out there who can and will appreciate and love you for who you are. As long as you keep asking the questions that you are already asking; the introspective ones that help you better yourself, you will come out of this stronger and wiser.

Those who have genuinely loved in this world always bear scars. Feel proud of them, and feel better.

 

[bodine91]

i hope

i hope that one day you will come to the inner peace you are seeking
i hope one day you will realize it wasn't your fault
i hope one day you will see that your posts on here show just how special you are
i hope one day all those scars that i share, with you, and there are quite a few heal as well.

did i mention its minus 35 c here tonight,

i hope someone finds the heat button again.

hope is our ally. take care

 

[papadoc19]

Wondering how you get the Mannequin Challenge from the "Black Beatles" song...nothing about the lyrics or the video make reference to it.