Labels

Since you mentioned the word "fag," perhaps this is a good place for me to mention that I won't be moderating posts based on that word. It's in the process of being reclaimed, and even though people have pointed out posts containing the word, I'm not offended by it. Yes, it's still used negatively all the time, but I don't see it as justification for moderation.

I actually like labels. I've come across some people who feel they're unfair, limiting, or offensive, but I don't agree. Well, they can be limiting, but that's why I plaster myself with as many labels as I feel is necessary.
 
labels are useful, but they are still annoying. why? i can't say. they just bug me sometimes. i use them, but i hate to. i don't think they are limiting though unless you make them limiting. they serve their purpose in public, but it's best not to use them in private.
 
Labels are useful at times. The problem with them IMHO, is that they can be taken and used to discriminate, insult and exclude and that's when it becomes a problem.

Another reason I dislike them is because they're so limiting - and changing them and adding more and more labels just gets too confusing.

They do serve a purpose, like recognizing certain groups you'd like to be a part of, meeting like-minded people etc.

I guess they're what you allow them to be.

p.s. worse like queer, fag, dyke etc.. are not offensive IMO at all, except when used in a derogatory manner.

Just like any other word.
 
PinkOrchid said:
Growing up in the situation I did, it was always used with affection or neutrality, as was "queer." I didn't realize it was a "bad" word until I was older. I still use "queer" with affection, although it may not always be taken that way. I just can't help it, it's in my subconscious that way.

I feel labels ARE limiting, sometimes offensive, but I also like the way YOU use them and how you also go beyond traditional or mainstream labeling to find what works for you. Hopefully I can learn something from you in this regard and give up some of my resistance to them, IF they are used appropriately.

Not only do I feel "queer" isn't offensive, I actually find it useful. I like using it as kind of a blanket term for everything that isn't heterosexual, rather than having to spell out every possibility all the time.

And wow, thanks for the compliment! I'm all tickled pink now. :)
 
I really hate labels. Not only the ones mentioned but all the way back to male and female. Yes, I'm not to fond of the labels male and female ether. Saddly I have not found a way to talk without useing them, but I am still working on that one. So I use them and still hate them. But why do I hate them. Well I think they answer the wrong question. They answer what one is instead of who one is. I really think that who one is, is far more important what one is. Really I think that people to offten try and use labels to tell who people are instead of what they are. I think if people didn't do that then I wouldn't hate labels so much.
 
I really hate labels. Not only the ones mentioned but all the way back to male and female. Yes, I'm not to fond of the labels male and female ether. Saddly I have not found a way to talk without useing them, but I am still working on that one. So I use them and still hate them. But why do I hate them. Well I think they answer the wrong question. They answer what one is instead of who one is. I really think that who one is, is far more important what one is. Really I think that people to offten try and use labels to tell who people are instead of what they are. I think if people didn't do that then I wouldn't hate labels so much.
 
I love the word dyke, love lesbian, and love queer. I identify as all three. I have done a lot of community outreach in the last year, some allies panels (a campus sponsored even to educated willing people about GLBT issues- these are people that want to be supportive), and have gone to several high schools to talk about the GLBT experience. Dyke, gay, fairy, Butch, Friend of Dorothy, Fruit fly, Fem, and several other words seem to be accepted, understood, and several of them have been reclaimed. A word that is not so easily accepted is the word "fag". Look this term up in the dictionary and you will see that it means a bundle of kindling. Know why this was associated with homosexual men? During the times of the holocaust, concentration camps, and genocide, gay men were burned alive, often while tied together, for being gay. I think that this is a term that you have to be very careful with. That is just my opinion.
 
I'm not a huge fan of labels but they help every now and then. I'm not particularly obsessive, or possessive over enough of things except music, food, sleeping, and sex. And I still try not to have labels.
I often compair the ouburst of labels in sex to the ones in music. If a new style comes out from another ...another label is formed... and since there are so so many individual styles, everyone wants credit, reconition and a "difference" between extravagant and subtle changes in music... I say almost the same goes for different sexual/non sexual lifestyles.

Also why I don't know my fetishs too well... I just know what turns me on oh so much, and the specific names because it helps me talk to another person about things, and the labels help me get specific.

Maybe paint color is another good example. White, offwhite, beige, not so white, brilliant white, snow white... etc..etc...etc.. and along the lines... the word snow for eskimos...we all know they have 100 different words for snow, bc their survival is baised on them.

But back to music and sex and labels ... think about the word Love.
We can love pizza, we can love heavy metal music, we can love the way our new appartment/dorm looks, we can love the new kitchen knife we got, love our dogs, our family, our capibility to be strong individuals and the new vibrator we bought ::winks::

And still the same word... love... not 100 different ones for the 100 different words for snow.... except when it comes down to who we love and what we loove to to with them...
bdsm, vanilla, dom/sub... gay/straight... queer/fag/lesbian/bisexual ....

I feel that the labels can be pretty excessive, but part of the culture. Not to forget regional differences, internet makes the world teeny tiny I've noticed, and now more then ever I feel we are all connected by 3 people. Fag, queer, nigger, spic, mick, guido, sub/dom ... everything we can possibly label a person, came from a different area or culture.
I'm sure the 100 different sexual labels have come from w/in the culture or bashing the culture, from different areas, and different people identifiying with a different part of themselves, or just feel slightly different from others thus creating the difference between fag and queer, lesbian and dyke... I know there is more to it, but someone started it and it cought on like wild fire.

Just my two sense on labels from a psych major's point of view, going to an environmental liberal arts college... trying to feel her oats to become what kind of "shrink" ... also having as many options to be labeled in a field of study to concentrait on like the "not straight" culture :)

Have a Gay day everyone :)
 
ooh, and i forgot what made me think to post all of that.
The reclaiming "fag" ... women have also been trying to reclaim the word "cunt" ... !!!!I reciently saw The Vagina Monologues, and rushed out to buy the book, and they even had a V-day at my campus, I'm so happy to say its going to turn into a tradition.
The book/show is by Eve Ensler, and is a MUST read for all ages, and all nationalities, all regions and all sexual labels
 
I'm a big ol' fag and I don't care!

Seriously, the issue of labeling is one that we will have to be a bit careful with here. More than one discussion group has been irreparably torn into gay versus bisexual factions, and labeling is one of the areas where the risk of such rifts is high.

Bisexuals may feel that labels are limiting and counterproductive, as is understandable from their perspective, but gays and lesbians may feel that such a few is assaultive to the integrity of their self image.

I would not accuse of bisexuals posting here of a lack of commitment to "queerness" or some such thing, and I hope in return, bisexuals will not see fit to tell me that by proudly claiming the label "Gay" I am being narrow or wrapping myself in a stereotype.
 
PinkOrchid said:
I'd love to hear people's views on labels.

I have definite issues with them, I think they tend to reduce significant complexities to petty terms, and they are often inaccurate and invite stereotype. I'm talking here about labels like gay/lesbian/ bi/straight/TG/TS, etc.

Also, I'd like to know how people feel about other labels? Gay/homosexual/queer/fag, etc. Are any of them offensive to you? Does one convey more personal meaning to you than another?

Other thoughts on this topic?

I can see your point but I dont totally agree.
Claiming myself as a lesbian makes me strong. Somebody else forcing a label on me, thats different. But I know who I am and I dont see it being a problem for me to say so loud and clear.

I call myself dyke all the time, no problem there.
 
intent plays a big part in how offensive these words are.

personally i never liked the word "queer".
 
glamorilla said:
intent plays a big part in how offensive these words are.

personally i never liked the word "queer".

given that the label was used becuase the word means "strange or different" I can understand
Gay means happy, it's nice :D
 
"Bad words. That's what they told us they were, remember? 'That's a bad word.' 'Awwww.' There are no bad words. Bad thoughts, bad intentions, and words. " - George Carlin

There have been a few discussions in the Authors Hangout about words that are viewed as offensive. For example. the word "bitch" is one of them. I have been called that in the heat of an argument more than once. However, my roomies and I will "affectionately" use that word with each other.

Being an author, I have found myself in situations where I needed to choose a word for the appropriate effect I wanted. The word "cunt" gives mixed reactions when it's used. Some people hate the sound of it because of the connotations behind it. However, others find it erotic when used at the right moment.

Labels don't bother me. We are labeled at birth by our parents. We are labeled throughout life. Some people don't like certain labels because of the connotations. So they prefer to use another word. But then at some point, that word takes on the same connotations. So we look for another word.

Words are what we make of them. No more, no less.


"I love words. I thank you for hearing my words. I want to tell you something about words that I uh, I think is important. I love..as I say, they're my work, they're my play, they're my passion. Words are all we have really. " - George Carlin
 
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