Kitten HELP!

[Bandit58]

*Hugs Grace*

I haven't attempted to rear kittens or puppies but being from a farming background I have reared countless orphan lambs and a calf or two.

Sometimes it's just not meant to be and no amount of beating yourself up about it helps.....I used to take comfort in the fact that I did my best for the poor creatures and at least when they died it was in a comfortable box in the shed or on a sack by the fire and not on the cold wet ground outside. And the ones who survived made up for the ones that didn't.....

 

[Jay Davis]

You did the best anyone could; it was just wasn't meant to be. Take comfort in the fact that you made it more comfortable and let it feel loved while it was still with you.

Try not to be too sad.

 

[graceanne]

It wouldn't be so bad if I hadn't put so much time and effort into it. I'm normally very careful to spend a minimum of time with the kittens so I won't get attached to them. *sigh*

And my older daughter if very upset. I think that's as hard as the kitten dying is having to tell her about it. It's like insult to injury. I'm already upset about it dying, and then I gotta handle her crying, which I hate. (Her crying, not handling it.)

Oh, well. I'd bet money their was something wrong with it's heart. Either that or it's lungs. It would look like it wasn't breathing, and then suddenly take a huge breath like it'd been startled. Quite frankly, yesterday when I picked it up to take to the vet, I looked at my hubby and said 'I don't think this one's gonna live much longer." But the vet kinda gave me hope, said it might make it. It'd been easier, I think if I hadn't gotten hopeful again.

Once again, thank you everyone for your hugs. *hugs*

 

[Jay Davis]

And my older daughter if very upset. I think that's as hard as the kitten dying is having to tell her about it. It's like insult to injury. I'm already upset about it dying, and then I gotta handle her crying, which I hate. (Her crying, not handling it.)

One of the most important things pets do for a child is teach her to survive death and loss. People who have had and lost pets as a child are much better prepared for the loss of people who are close to them later on in life. This experience will help her to learn how to mourn, but also to learn that eventually, life does go on, and we must go on with it, no matter how much we love those we've lost.

After all, there are still several more kittens house right now that need love and attention, and can continue to bring joy, even if the little one is gone. Try to help her to focus on that aspect, so that she realizes there is a tomorrow, no matter how crummy and unfair things seem today.

It's probably a good idea to find a nice box, let her decorate it, and then have a small ceremony to bury the kitten. Again, this is a practice ritual that helps kids to deal with human death in the future, and it can be very healthy for them to participate in. Even better, if she's old enough, let her conceive and perform the ceremony, so she feels some sense of control in a situation that might otherwise leave her feeling helpless and vulnerable.

Edit: one last thing...even at the age of 37, my sister is still deeply affected by the loss of a pet. Due to remarkable bad luck, she lost 3 cats in four years recently. When we buried each one, we planted a new flowering bush over it, which serves as a memorial to the beloved pet that can live for years, reminding her of her departed kitty without filling the yard with homemade headstones.

 

[graceanne]

One of the most important things pets do for a child is teach her to survive death and loss. People who have had and lost pets as a child are much better prepared for the loss of people who are close to them later on in life. This experience will help her to learn how to mourn, but also to learn that eventually, life does go on, and we must go on with it, no matter how much we love those we've lost.

After all, there are still several more kittens house right now that need love and attention, and can continue to bring joy, even if the little one is gone. Try to help her to focus on that aspect, so that she realizes there is a tomorrow, no matter how crummy and unfair things seem today.

It's probably a good idea to find a nice box, let her decorate it, and then have a small ceremony to bury the kitten. Again, this is a practice ritual that helps kids to deal with human death in the future, and it can be very healthy for them to participate in. Even better, if she's old enough, let her conceive and perform the ceremony, so she feels some sense of control in a situation that might otherwise leave her feeling helpless and vulnerable.

Edit: one last thing...even at the age of 37, my sister is still deeply affected by the loss of a pet. Due to remarkable bad luck, she lost 3 cats in four years recently. When we buried each one, we planted a new flowering bush over it, which serves as a memorial to the beloved pet that can live for years, reminding her of her departed kitty without filling the yard with homemade headstones.

Actually we do that. We get a shoe box, she draws a picture of the cat/kitten on the top, and then we all bury it together. Then we put a big rock over it, so she'll know where it is.

And part of hte problem is that we've lost several cats in the last year. Last year we got two cats, Janie and Sherbert. Two days after we got them our screen door got broke. While my husband was up at the store getting the parts to fix it Janie got out and the neighbors Rot got her. So we got another cat, the one we have now. Then about 4 months ago Sherbert got hit by a car. So we kept one of M&M's kittens, Bandit. Bandit, by the way, is an indoor cat. Then Runt. We're having really bad luck with our cats.

 

[chris9]

When I was around twelve or something, I used to take piano lessons. I went to the teacher's house. One day her cat had kittens the morning before my lesson in the afternoon in the room with the piano. So then, for the next ten weeks or so I watched those darling cute little tiny kittens grow up until they finally climbed on my lap when I was trying to play (during that time my skill didn't improve much ). From the second week onwards I was having hopeless fights with my parents, because I wanted to take one home. My dad is highly allergic So for the last maybe 3 or 4 weeks that the kittens remained, I always went home crying a LOT because I couldn't have one and wouldn't see them again and such
So even though I know that it's hard to lose pets, I'm always very envious when I hear about people having them...
Some day, when I'm out of the city again, living in my own house (they don't often allow animals in rented homes), I really really want to have a cat

 

[catalina_francisco]

Sorry you lost the kitty Grace. It certainly wasn't from neglect as it would have been without your love to help it through what was likely a painful experience. I tend to think like you that there was some major problem in it's vital organs which made it the runt of the litter......it seems their mummies are good at sensing this and due to needing to maximise the chances of as many babies making it as possible, they don't waste any sustenance or energy on the one beyond their help. Sad reality of life. Take comfort in knowing you were there for the wee thing and it had some love and care in it's short life.

Catalina

 

[graceanne]

Sorry you lost the kitty Grace. It certainly wasn't from neglect as it would have been without your love to help it through what was likely a painful experience. I tend to think like you that there was some major problem in it's vital organs which made it the runt of the litter......it seems their mummies are good at sensing this and due to needing to maximise the chances of as many babies making it as possible, they don't waste any sustenance or energy on the one beyond their help. Sad reality of life. Take comfort in knowing you were there for the wee thing and it had some love and care in it's short life.

Catalina

Actually - I thought I'd posted this, she had a bad heart. If I'd known this earlier and seperated her at birth she probably would have been fine, but I didn't know and I didn't seperate her, so the heart problems added to the rest killed her.