Kink in college

[YourCaptor]

There is no kink in college. Why?

Maybe it’s the stereotype that’s got me disappointed. You know, wild and crazy college kids.

Truth is I can count the number of kinky people I have met on one hand. All of which where coincidental meetings.

I can count the number of times someone has told me about someone kinky on two hands. The kinkiest of which was a girl who told her guy that its ok if he fucks her while she sleeps, that is as extreme as its gotten. And he dumped her for it, psycho.

Are college kids totally naïve about sex? Considering how many times I face-palm when talking about sex, it’s looking that way.

Why is this? Horrid sex education, are kinksters that rare, are people just content with whatever form of sex it is they get.

Or is it that kink doesn’t pop into the mind while piss drunk in the middle of a wet tshirt orgy.

Yea I know this does not seem the most relevant place to post this, but considering college kinksters don’t exist, it really doesn’t matter

 

[graceanne]

I dunno about the whole college kids thing, but I think the majority of people are a lot more naive than they'd like to admit. My best friend doesn't know the half of kinky things and she's not anywhere close to a virgin. The most kinky thing she's done is anal sex. She thinks tying people up and the like is SICK. lol I just tell her not to knock it until you try it. Even K, who's not so easy to shock, GAPED at me when we were at the toy store and we found the horse tail butt plug. LOL

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Naive about sex? Yes.

Kinky? Yes.

Hell, there are campus BDSM munch groups on some campuses. They are NOT all clueless. But the vast majority of them ARE young and inexperienced, I don't care how much fucking they've done, it's a rare college student who has really gotten very far on the kinky learning curve. Most are on the flat side of the equation.

 

[YourCaptor]

Naive about sex? Yes.

Kinky? Yes.

Hell, there are campus BDSM munch groups on some campuses. They are NOT all clueless. But the vast majority of them ARE young and inexperienced, I don't care how much fucking they've done, it's a rare college student who has really gotten very far on the kinky learning curve. Most are on the flat side of the equation.

I have never heard of a munch on campus.

Clubs need to be campus related so I don't think they are even allowed, or a better wording, won't get funded... unless privately funded. I suppose you can pass it off as a brotherhood or something.

I have never come across any though.

 

[CurlyKat]

I might get hit over the head for this, as there are a number of college-aged people around here (and I'm pretty dang young, too), but I think for the most part the college scene is lacking in kink because of the extra thought that has to go into kink. It requires creativity, planning, self-control, and maturity; none of which are things college students are stereotypically known for when it comes to sex. Hormones could possibly play a huge role in that, because the drive is to just have sex when you get the chance. Sex in and of itself is still a fairly new thing to many college students, so even the simple stuff as far as kink goes still feels like massive exploration. Social standing and acceptance may also keep those that do have kinky interests from voicing their desires.

As always, there are people who won't fit these assumptions. Those will be the few and far between that can express what they really want earlier on, which will hopefully lead to more fulfilling relationships for them.

 

[YourCaptor]

I took psych of human sexuality, which was a terrible class. All that went on in their was basically, "people do this, this, and this", while everyone responded with, "omg, sick", or hysterical laughter.

I think that was partially so cause the professor tried to get everyone to ease up. She even showed a comedy.

Maybe that serves as some commentary on college sex.

 

[BiBunny]

All my friends (mid- to late-twenties, for the most part) are at least kink-friendly, and many are actively kinky. I live in a college town, and several of us are in grad school. We're not all clueless fucks, BUT then I tend to gravitate toward people who are very much like me. And avoid the ones who annoy me.

I sincerely doubt most people who go to school here are that kinky, or even most younger people, period. Just check out the online kinky sites, like CollarMe and FetLife and even Lit to some extent. Most of the people on them are middle-aged.

I have a lot of thoughts about why that is, but I won't go there because I might piss someone off, and this is not one of those threads.

 

[Aquila1]

I dunno about the whole college kids thing, but I think the majority of people are a lot more naive than they'd like to admit. My best friend doesn't know the half of kinky things and she's not anywhere close to a virgin. The most kinky thing she's done is anal sex. She thinks tying people up and the like is SICK. lol I just tell her not to knock it until you try it. Even K, who's not so easy to shock, GAPED at me when we were at the toy store and we found the horse tail butt plug. LOL

I'm sorry, I must be in a silly mood, but your choice of words? She gaped at you? Really?

*snorts and runs away giggling*

 

[graceanne]

I'm sorry, I must be in a silly mood, but your choice of words? She gaped at you? Really?

*snorts and runs away giggling*

No silly allowed in here! *frown ferociously*

ETA: HE gaped at me. K's my husband.

 

[Aquila1]

No silly allowed in here! *frown ferociously*

ETA: HE gaped at me. K's my husband.

It was more the, um, mental picture my mind made of someone gaping at a butt plug in the middle of a store. I can be very puerile sometimes.

 

[graceanne]

It was more the, um, mental picture my mind made of someone gaping at a butt plug in the middle of a store. I can be very puerile sometimes.

Pervert!

I think we got more attention from me laughing at K's face! Oh, my word it was so funny. Even funnier than all the signs saying 'please don't hit people with the whips'. (Those were EVERYWHERE.)

 

[Arotico]

I agree with CurlyKat. College kids can barely find time when their roommate won't walk in on them, much less do anything kinky that involves set up or clean up. Plus, if you store some aparatus in your room some clown is bound to find it and turn your private pleasure into a public nightmare.

But then it depends on the kink. I hear that at the school in my town the most popular place to do it is in the laundry rooms of the dorms. So if you like to let people watch you having sex there are plenty of opportunities. Or is that not even considered kinky any more?

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I have never heard of a munch on campus.

Clubs need to be campus related so I don't think they are even allowed, or a better wording, won't get funded... unless privately funded. I suppose you can pass it off as a brotherhood or something.

I have never come across any though.

http://www.cuffs.stuorg.iastate.edu/

Nuff said.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I don't think they are currently active (at least the links to their websites are not), but I know that at one time, both the University of South Carolina and Clemson University had BDSM student organizations also. If they were there, they are elsewhere.

 

[MisterSir]

It's not the most practical of things to do, either. England's different to America in that having roommates is very uncommon - in all three years, I lived in a hall of residence with my own bedoom and bathroom and a shared kitchen, nothing more - but even there the amount of times I heard people having sex was surprisingly high. Now compare the sounds of sex to the sounds of a good spanking.

 

[subish2009]

I just think the majority of undergrads are plain old too immature to have come to terms with their kink yet. I know there are several college-age Litsters here, and obviously, you're exceptions. But IMO most people in their late teens and early 20s are still too busy trying to figure out who they are and what they like and who they like to be out and active in a BDSM lifestyle. I bet more couples are privately kinky at that age, having someone consistent with whom to explore. The university I went to was small, elite, and intolerant of "different." It took me years to come to grips and achieve real acceptance of my kink. And even now, it's not like my friends know, so why would it be any different for college kids? (Again, obviously, there are exceptions. These are just my impressions of the majority.)

 

[SophieUK]

It's not the most practical of things to do, either. England's different to America in that having roommates is very uncommon - in all three years, I lived in a hall of residence with my own bedoom and bathroom and a shared kitchen, nothing more - but even there the amount of times I heard people having sex was surprisingly high. Now compare the sounds of sex to the sounds of a good spanking.

Guess its different now.. when I went to college (Birmingham) there were some shared rooms in halls.. and I agree with the sentiments on here that maybe we were too immature for outright 'kinks' but having sex while room roommate (allegedly?) slept definitely started me of down the route!

 

[OzoneRed]

http://conversiovirium.org/about/

Columbia University-based BDSM club.

 

[eastern sun]

Columbia University has an active group. They have regular meetings at Paddles in NYC, and college students get diiscounted entry fees.

I also had kinky relationships in college. Stumbling, inexperienced, and often awkward. The only time I've ever found myself with my face in the dirt and a boot on my head was during those halcyon years. (I barely graduated on time.)

It may be that many college students haven't figured out how to read all the cues people are giving off. I mean how do you tell if someone's kinky or not, without reading their posts on lit?

If I trust my instincts, and respond to the people who I find attractive (whether they fit the standards of the day or not), I invariably end up with someone who likes the kinds of things I do. But you do have to get to know people to find out who they are.

 

[StrayKat]

It may be that many college students haven't figured out how to read all the cues people are giving off. I mean how do you tell if someone's kinky or not, without reading their posts on lit?

If I trust my instincts, and respond to the people who I find attractive (whether they fit the standards of the day or not), I invariably end up with someone who likes the kinds of things I do. But you do have to get to know people to find out who they are.

That is so very much true. Even at older age one tends to get confused about mixed signals or sometimes their own wishes.
And sometimes it takes years to figure out what exactly "the itch" is and how to scratch it.

 

[be_ignited]

I would think kinksters in college are as concerned with being outed as anyone else, especially if they plan to go into fields with 'high visibility' (education, business, etc). I know that I have no desire to have half my campus, including my professors, know I enojy it when my boyfriend ties me up. Nor do I particularly want to hear those stories about anyone else, because they're usually of the "Listen to what _____ did, she's such a slut." So, I don't think if they are kinky, college kids are out there broadcasting it, but then again, are most people?

Having said that, I've found that many people here are pretty open to kink. I run a writing workshop, and last year I got a group of us together to go to the NELA Fetish Fleamarket in Providence. I think they were mostly going for the novelty of it, while my boyfriend and I were going to learn some stuff and pick up new equipment. But everyone who went last year, plus a few more, want to go again this year.

At my school, they would never allow a campus sponsored BDSM group, but I think some of it slips under the radar through our women's center (responsible for a lot of the sex-advocacy on campus).

 

[FurryFury]

I think you have to put some thought into where the kinky people might hang out. I bet you'd find some in the Athropology department for instance or club.

I'm sure you'd find some in the atheist and vegan and GBLT groups as well. I'm speaking here as the mother of a college student. There is kink in college.

 

[JMohegan]

There is no kink in college. Why?

Maybe it’s the stereotype that’s got me disappointed. You know, wild and crazy college kids.

Truth is I can count the number of kinky people I have met on one hand. All of which where coincidental meetings.

I can count the number of times someone has told me about someone kinky on two hands. The kinkiest of which was a girl who told her guy that its ok if he fucks her while she sleeps, that is as extreme as its gotten. And he dumped her for it, psycho.

Are college kids totally naïve about sex? Considering how many times I face-palm when talking about sex, it’s looking that way.

Why is this? Horrid sex education, are kinksters that rare, are people just content with whatever form of sex it is they get.

Or is it that kink doesn’t pop into the mind while piss drunk in the middle of a wet tshirt orgy.

Yea I know this does not seem the most relevant place to post this, but considering college kinksters don’t exist, it really doesn’t matter

Are you in seminary school or something? Last time you vented like this, you were bitchin' that girls at your school aren't submissive enough, translated as: willing to fuck you despite their disinterest in said fucking.

We were tying up, restraining, spanking, applying clothes pins or clips to sensitive body parts, paddling, and whipping females (in addition to the obvious group sex and anal sex) - in college, more than 3 decades ago. It would be totally irrational for me to assume that college kids have subsequently become less adventurous, particularly given access to the Internet, which of course we never had.

As an aside - the entire universe of Greek hazing is chock full of sadistic endeavors involving the discomfort and humiliation of initiates. Hazing was forbidden at my particular frat house (per rules laid down by the coach who was our sponsor), but I saw and heard about all kinds of sadistic shit going down at the other Greek houses. I've heard that universities have been trying to crack down on hazing in recent years, but find it hard to believe that it's been totally eradicated.

 

[Netzach]

I might get hit over the head for this, as there are a number of college-aged people around here (and I'm pretty dang young, too), but I think for the most part the college scene is lacking in kink because of the extra thought that has to go into kink. It requires creativity, planning, self-control, and maturity; none of which are things college students are stereotypically known for when it comes to sex. Hormones could possibly play a huge role in that, because the drive is to just have sex when you get the chance. Sex in and of itself is still a fairly new thing to many college students, so even the simple stuff as far as kink goes still feels like massive exploration. Social standing and acceptance may also keep those that do have kinky interests from voicing their desires.

As always, there are people who won't fit these assumptions. Those will be the few and far between that can express what they really want earlier on, which will hopefully lead to more fulfilling relationships for them.

You left out time cash and massive untaken-up energy.
I had none of any of those in college. A marathon hump in my bf's single was as good as it was going to get. I was in a very very academically competitive school and I had too much shit to do and write frankly.

 

[Netzach]

I think you have to put some thought into where the kinky people might hang out. I bet you'd find some in the Athropology department for instance or club.

I'm sure you'd find some in the atheist and vegan and GBLT groups as well. I'm speaking here as the mother of a college student. There is kink in college.

Fine Art dept in our case.

A lot of people were curious/frustrated/dipping toes in and fetish would show up in art. Also media studies.