Killing my own orgasm!

[tiffany_fowler]

Hello I am not new per say I have been coming to lit for a while I just have never posted anything on here. I have a problem a big problem to me. I had my son 3 months ago and the whole nine months I was pregnant I was very dry. If me and my husband didn't use lube well I wasn't enjoying sex at all. Now that I have had my first "real" period and feel a little more like my old self I find that I am way to wet. Does that make sense? I don't know if anyone else has ever had this problem but I get so wet that I kill my own orgasm. You know that feeling you get, the one that a little friction makes the bomb go off, well I am killing the friction all together I didn't have my son vaginally so I can't say that I have changed down there in elasticity. When we first get started it feels great and then it goes to hell. I know that most of you are thinking why am I complaining but I want to have an orgasm, I am not the toy girl when it comes to sex, I like them don't get me wrong but I can't use one and try to have sex at the same time, I am not that coordinated. I need to know if I am just over reacting, or is it because my body is still trying to get used to not being pregnant anymore? I don't know what to do, please any advice would be very helpful.

 

[SweetErika]

Have you talked to your OBGYN about this?

Are you breastfeeding?

Three months postnatal isn't a long time at all in the grand scheme of things, especially if you're breastfeeding. Your body may have just changed w/ the pregnancy, or perhaps it simply needs more time (think more like up to a year or two) to find the right balance. If you're concerned about your hormones being off and when they're likely to return to normal, you should talk to your doctor. S/he can determine where your hormone levels are at and probably give you a better idea of why you have so much natural lube at this point, when it might stop, what you might try, etc.

In the meantime, you might have to find some workarounds, like orgasming before or after sex, trying different types of stimulation, different positions, and adding clitoral stimulation to sex. Play around to see what helps, and expand on that! For instance, maybe toys don't work well for you in some positions, but they would in others (we really like using a vibe with a nice, slow-paced scissors position).

There are also a couple of threads on excessive wetness with good info in post #3 in The Blank Manual sticky, too, so check those out.

 

[tiffany_fowler]

Thanks. This is my first child and when they say your body changes well I found out just how true that is. Not that I am regretting it. I just would like it to go back to normal. No I am not breastfeeding, had some problems with milk production so couldn't do it. I guess I can ask my ob, he is a little on the soft side if you know what I mean. He is a great doctor just gives the round about answers for sexual questions. I am sure I will get past this, its just that you look forward to sex after you have a child, then when its not what you expected you are dissapointed.

 

[SweetErika]

Thanks. This is my first child and when they say your body changes well I found out just how true that is. Not that I am regretting it. I just would like it to go back to normal. No I am not breastfeeding, had some problems with milk production so couldn't do it. I guess I can ask my ob, he is a little on the soft side if you know what I mean. He is a great doctor just gives the round about answers for sexual questions. I am sure I will get past this, its just that you look forward to sex after you have a child, then when its not what you expected you are dissapointed.

Maybe you need to see a doctor who is knowledgeable about sex, as well as pregnancy and other OBGYN issues. After all, sexual health is a very important part of overall health.

BTW, if your username happens to be your real full name, you should seriously consider re-registering with a name that doesn't include your last name before you get more posts under your belt. Most of the people here are wonderful, but when it comes to something like sharing personal info with strangers, it's better to be safe by guarding that info than sorry if a lunatic decides to track you down.

 

[working_girl]

Until things settle a bit more, can you not just have a towel or something handy and wipe some of the moisture away during intercourse? It doesn't have to interrupt things or kill the mood, just a quick swipe when you change position or something? Also, you might want to try your guy with a cockring that has a clit stimulator on it. You can get a lot more friction that way.

 

[sweet_escape]

Thanks. This is my first child and when they say your body changes well I found out just how true that is. Not that I am regretting it. I just would like it to go back to normal. No I am not breastfeeding, had some problems with milk production so couldn't do it. I guess I can ask my ob, he is a little on the soft side if you know what I mean. He is a great doctor just gives the round about answers for sexual questions. I am sure I will get past this, its just that you look forward to sex after you have a child, then when its not what you expected you are dissapointed.

Hang in there, Tiffany. Pregnancy's hard work on your body and it does take a while for life to return to normal. Throw in the tiredness from late night feeds and that just makes things worse!

I'm sure you'll be back to your usual self soon (it took me about six months to return to my version of normal). If you're worried, changing your doctor so you can talk openly and get direct answers will give you the reassurance you need.

 

[TIFFANI]

This is the ninny that has changed her name. I can use a towel, that might help a bit, and I did call the doc. They say that sometimes when your body is healing that it produces more lube, but it was called something else. I will have to wait and see. I hope that I go back to normal soon, and yes I am up for all those late night feedings with one eye open and one closed. I do appreciate everyone responding, thanks.