Lisa Denton
Can nipples explode?
- Joined
- Jun 23, 2004
- Posts
- 7,758
I saw this last nite on a torrent D/L that I got. It was some shows from Discovery called "I shoudn't have lived" or sumpthin like that. I have never seen them and thought I would share a strange one. The names is changed to protect the innocent and also cause I don't remember, except one. Also I am abbreviating and deviating slightly to make it quick.
2 guys who was friends, and one of them's wife, and her mother and father was on a fun filled frolicin fishin trip down the Zambawbe River, or some river like that, its not important the name or spelling.
Now, they are in a boat. They are seeing nice hippopatamusses lounging around the river as they float by fishing. But a rogue killer hippopatamus attacks them.
Yes, I was surprised also. Apparently this hippo was a berserk killer. It looked like something out of jaws or some crap. He was mean and rammin thier boat and stuff and knocked it over.
Then I guess he went to sleep or something, I dunno, it didn't show the hippo no more. Now, most of the peoples, and mom can't swim, is getting carried down the river but find a sandbar in the middle that they can stand on, the water is about waist deep.
Fast foward, one guy "Alistair" is still on the overtuned boat while the other 4 peoples is stuck standing on the sandbar in the middle of the river. Alistair tells them he is going to swim to shore and get help. They was screamin for him not to do it. Because there is killer crocodiles all over the place, like every 200 yards or so along the shore, but he does it. He swims getting pulled downriver and swims into a small inlet where they can't see him. He makes it to shore. Before he can pull himself out he turns around and sees in the water behind him a big crocodile 10 feet from him.
Its a big mean crocodile, so Alistair decides to attack it.
Don't try this at home.
Don't smoke this shit at home.
Alistair ducks under water and him and the crocodile attack each other at once, needless to say, Alistair was losing.
The crocodile bit his arm and held on, dislocated his shoulder, broke his arm in several places and had him in a death roll, swirling him around to drown him. He must have seen a Tarzan movie or something because he shoved his free hand into the crocodiles throat and pushed back the membrane that keeps water out, making the crocodile let him go. He crawls up on shore, alive.
He yells to his friends that he has been mauled by a crocodile, convincing them that trying to swim for safety is stupid, but as they yell "how bad are you hurt" and stuff he don't answer. He has lost a lot of blood and can't answer, he stumbles away from the shore to get away from crocodiles and shit and sits down leaning against a tree , safe, yea right.
Fast forward, hours pass, the friends standing stuck in the middle of the river know Alistair is not going for help, possibly dead or dying. Nighttime comes, roving packs of killer hyenas, lions and all kinds of shit is all around. Alistair wakes up to see a killer buffalo looking at him.
I was surprised also, apparently buffaloes over there is mean killers. They showed how a Cape Buffalo can actually pull a crocodile out of the water with his teeth, mean killer buffaloes. The music is drum rolls, the buffalo starts towards him, the drum rolls get faster. But about 10 feet from him the killer buffalo gets tired and lays down to munch some alphalpha or some shit. Which prolly saves Alistair's life cause hyena's and lions and shit don't want to fuck with a huge killer buffalo.
Fast foward, mornin time, Alistair wakes up, and his friends, still stuck standing in the middle of the river, hear him screaming bloody murder. He's not getting eaten by the buffalo luckily, but unluckily, he is getting eaten by a swarm of driver ants. They said driver ants can actually kill and eat humans. The pain of the driver ants eating his ass though is enough for him to get up and stumble around some more.
After awhile he stumbles out to the river and sees a couple who had pulled thier boat up to shore across the river and is having a picnic. He is too weak to call out loud after bein attacked by rogue hippopatimusses, and fighting killer crocodiles, and killer buffaloes, and killer driver ants, so he just lays down to die.
But as they are leavin and see him, and save him, and 2 peoples kayaking down the river see the wierdos standin in the middle of the river and save them.
They said doctor's saved Alistair's arm.
After watching this show I was left ponderin and thinkin, and I came to the conclusion that for Alistair at least, the title was apt:
"I shouldn't have lived"
2 guys who was friends, and one of them's wife, and her mother and father was on a fun filled frolicin fishin trip down the Zambawbe River, or some river like that, its not important the name or spelling.
Now, they are in a boat. They are seeing nice hippopatamusses lounging around the river as they float by fishing. But a rogue killer hippopatamus attacks them.
Yes, I was surprised also. Apparently this hippo was a berserk killer. It looked like something out of jaws or some crap. He was mean and rammin thier boat and stuff and knocked it over.
Then I guess he went to sleep or something, I dunno, it didn't show the hippo no more. Now, most of the peoples, and mom can't swim, is getting carried down the river but find a sandbar in the middle that they can stand on, the water is about waist deep.
Fast foward, one guy "Alistair" is still on the overtuned boat while the other 4 peoples is stuck standing on the sandbar in the middle of the river. Alistair tells them he is going to swim to shore and get help. They was screamin for him not to do it. Because there is killer crocodiles all over the place, like every 200 yards or so along the shore, but he does it. He swims getting pulled downriver and swims into a small inlet where they can't see him. He makes it to shore. Before he can pull himself out he turns around and sees in the water behind him a big crocodile 10 feet from him.
Its a big mean crocodile, so Alistair decides to attack it.
Don't try this at home.
Don't smoke this shit at home.
Alistair ducks under water and him and the crocodile attack each other at once, needless to say, Alistair was losing.
The crocodile bit his arm and held on, dislocated his shoulder, broke his arm in several places and had him in a death roll, swirling him around to drown him. He must have seen a Tarzan movie or something because he shoved his free hand into the crocodiles throat and pushed back the membrane that keeps water out, making the crocodile let him go. He crawls up on shore, alive.
He yells to his friends that he has been mauled by a crocodile, convincing them that trying to swim for safety is stupid, but as they yell "how bad are you hurt" and stuff he don't answer. He has lost a lot of blood and can't answer, he stumbles away from the shore to get away from crocodiles and shit and sits down leaning against a tree , safe, yea right.
Fast forward, hours pass, the friends standing stuck in the middle of the river know Alistair is not going for help, possibly dead or dying. Nighttime comes, roving packs of killer hyenas, lions and all kinds of shit is all around. Alistair wakes up to see a killer buffalo looking at him.
I was surprised also, apparently buffaloes over there is mean killers. They showed how a Cape Buffalo can actually pull a crocodile out of the water with his teeth, mean killer buffaloes. The music is drum rolls, the buffalo starts towards him, the drum rolls get faster. But about 10 feet from him the killer buffalo gets tired and lays down to munch some alphalpha or some shit. Which prolly saves Alistair's life cause hyena's and lions and shit don't want to fuck with a huge killer buffalo.
Fast foward, mornin time, Alistair wakes up, and his friends, still stuck standing in the middle of the river, hear him screaming bloody murder. He's not getting eaten by the buffalo luckily, but unluckily, he is getting eaten by a swarm of driver ants. They said driver ants can actually kill and eat humans. The pain of the driver ants eating his ass though is enough for him to get up and stumble around some more.
After awhile he stumbles out to the river and sees a couple who had pulled thier boat up to shore across the river and is having a picnic. He is too weak to call out loud after bein attacked by rogue hippopatimusses, and fighting killer crocodiles, and killer buffaloes, and killer driver ants, so he just lays down to die.
But as they are leavin and see him, and save him, and 2 peoples kayaking down the river see the wierdos standin in the middle of the river and save them.
They said doctor's saved Alistair's arm.
After watching this show I was left ponderin and thinkin, and I came to the conclusion that for Alistair at least, the title was apt:
"I shouldn't have lived"
