Just Plain Depressing...

[Sammael Bard]

Here's a message from my inbox this morning.

Hi TSB,

Just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving my account. I won't be on Lit anymore. Things have gone out of hand and the emails I've recieved aren't helping my anxieties either.

It was nice knowing a bit of you and I'm glad for that advice on making my PM selective. Saved me a lot of Heartburn, you know?

I'm really glad that I got to know you first, here in Forums. I couldn't have asked for a better friend and guide.

Thank you for being polite and all.

Just to prove your opinion about creeps, I've forwarded 3 e-mails to you. I turn my PM off, so they resort to Feedback. Imagine my surprise when I got feedbacks when I've never written a story here.

I have a job to go back to [Yes, I'm a workaholic ] and I don't think I can stay employed with these incidents circling in my mind.

Anyways, thanks for being kind to an anonymous passerby. I hope that you achieve your dreams someday and be successful in life.

And I Hope we meet in real life someday.

Talk about women being harassed by unsolicited emails from creeps.

Checked my mail soon after, and they were really sick.

I don't have a clue why she did this, but I feel bad for her nonetheless.

I don't know if you'd be reading this or not, but I do hope your short time here wasn't marred by those mails. These things are a sad reality here.

 

[GoddessFreya]

That's quite an unfortunate incident.

 

[StrangeLife]

It is unfortunate that the person in question is so sensitive, because that pretty much excludes her from using any kind of social media, unless censored or heavily curated. Creepozoids with no manners are kinda like spam-mails and animated-ads - they are simply part of the background noise of the Internet.

 

[TamLin01]

Saying that it's "Just the way things are" is making excuses for it. No one should have to put up with that. It being "the way things are" is the problem to begin with.

 

[Sammael Bard]

Saying that it's "Just the way things are" is making excuses for it. No one should have to put up with that. It being "the way things are" is the problem to begin with.

There's no way she could've sent a 'Hey Douchebag' reply without giving away her email id.

And judging by the looks of it, that was her real id.

I've sent her an email to turn off all private feedback. That way she'll have no contact with Lit.

She's pretty unnerved about one particular anon. Email.

Somewhere in the forums, she may have blurted out her locality, or that person figured it out. Either ways, he (most probably) told her that he'd like to visit her at home someday and "show her how a real man fucked a woman".

I mean, WTF are you trying to prove, man?

 

[DeYaKen]

There's no way she could've sent a 'Hey Douchebag' reply without giving away her email id.

And judging by the looks of it, that was her real id.

I've sent her an email to turn off all private feedback. That way she'll have no contact with Lit.

She's pretty unnerved about one particular anon. Email.

Somewhere in the forums, she may have blurted out her locality, or that person figured it out. Either ways, he (most probably) told her that he'd like to visit her at home someday and "show her how a real man fucked a woman".

I mean, WTF are you trying to prove, man?

That sounds like a threatened rape. She should report it. No one is truly anonymous on the internet any more. If no one reports these things, the scale of the problem goes unrecorded and nothing gets done. What the anonymous poster has done is a crime and it should be reported.

 

[Sammael Bard]

That sounds like a threatened rape. She should report it. No one is truly anonymous on the internet any more. If no one reports these things, the scale of the problem goes unrecorded and nothing gets done. What the anonymous poster has done is a crime and it should be reported.

I don't know. Most probably she won't come out in the open with this. She said she doesn't want to have anything to do with this website anymore.

What really hit home was the fact that she has to face an identity crisis on an anon. Website. I'm sure as hell he won't find her, but...that faceless message could scare the living hell out of any woman.

 

[desiwife16]

how touchy...

 

[lovecraft68]

how touchy...

Yes, not every woman here is begging to be cyber sexed like you are, some are just here for reading and fun, hard to believe for some people, I know.

 

[Daniel_Matthews]

That sounds like a threatened rape. She should report it. No one is truly anonymous on the internet any more. If no one reports these things, the scale of the problem goes unrecorded and nothing gets done. What the anonymous poster has done is a crime and it should be reported.

I don't know if my 2 cents is worth it or not, but an anonymous feedback is damn near untracable, I think.

And even if she contacts the police regarding this, they won't have any serious charge to level against that person because he hasn't explicitly stated anything like 'rape', although all of us can understand his intentions.

Also, I don't think he'll be charged with anything serious, given his comment. That will later result into greater danger for the woman in question because now he'd know who she is.

 

[lovecraft68]

I've mentioned many times here lit can be an unfriendly place for women.

There are a lot of cool, decent guys on this site, but like with everything else its the creeps that set the tone.

There are a lot of men here who assume that because a woman is on this site she wants a daddy or to be tied and raped or to just act like a cyber slut and when the women refuse them they get called names.

A couple of months ago my wife was on here posting on a thread that had nothing to do with sex and someone sends her a PM about how he is going to bend her over, tie her up etc.., her reply was, "Not even a hello, its you're going to do this? Sorry, not interested"

This is what she got back.

oh look its mother teresa talkin! whom the fuck are you kidding you dirty cunt?! why the fuck else are you here?! for bible study?! why the fuck do you need a hi?! are you sitting in production meeting in the office. you are no good whore and you don't deserve any fucking pleasantaries. wake up from that dream Cinderella cunt. Its not 'can i ganbang you'.. its 'get to your business and only thing you are worthy of you cunt!' you know what.. you just established you are a fuckin hypocrite and hypocrites belong to my iggy bin so off you go cry to your daddy rotten cunt!

Cute,huh? And as this thread shows this is close to the norm.

And the site has a harassment rule does it not? But go to the site with that issue and the response is "that is what ignore is for."

So like anything else the site could give to shits what goes on here. The AH and other writing related forums are generally "safe" but any other forum is not friendly to women unless they are showing pics of their tits and want to act like a cyber whore.

But, again when the sites favorite word is cunt and it is used repeatedly by the owner why should anyone act any different?

There is a poster here who was in the GB and speaking with some guy for awhile, he wanted to masturbate together over skype, she said no. The person then started threads that she was a former poster(a male) who was a child molester and she was harassed repeatedly for awhile.

The sites freedom of speech policy is an excuse for cyber bullying and the site could care less, no surprise there.

I've said many times there is a sub culture here of abuse towards women, but either no one wants to believe me, or they would just rather not admit it.

Picture the comments LW trolls make on our stories then imagine that type of person stalking you here, because they are pretty much the same type. Scumbags in real life who live with mom or can;t get laid or get it up so they come here and act like this.

And typical of that type in my reply to the asshat who sent that to my wife, not only did he never reply, but that was two months ago and I have yet to see them post here again. I guess a coward is a coward even on the net.

 

[lovecraft68]

There's no way she could've sent a 'Hey Douchebag' reply without giving away her email id.

And judging by the looks of it, that was her real id.

I've sent her an email to turn off all private feedback. That way she'll have no contact with Lit.

She's pretty unnerved about one particular anon. Email.

Somewhere in the forums, she may have blurted out her locality, or that person figured it out. Either ways, he (most probably) told her that he'd like to visit her at home someday and "show her how a real man fucked a woman".

I mean, WTF are you trying to prove, man?

You can set up a dummy e-mail just for lit and in properties make it show up under a different name, a pen name for instance. I received rape threats after an LW story because they thought I was a woman.

Shame is there are a lot of women on here who have no problem flirting and role playing and talking slutty so I don;t know why they have to harass women who don;t want to.

Oh, wait, that's right because they are men and that is how it should be and literotica proves in many ways that it agrees with that.

 

[Serafina1210]

Yes, not every woman here is begging to be cyber sexed like you are, some are just here for reading and fun, hard to believe for some people, I know.

This.

The Internet has a huge cyberstalking problem. See Amanda Hess "Why Women Aren't Welcome on the Internet" in Pacific Standard (January) for hair-raising examples.

Every woman is a likely target. I can't blame anyone for saying To Hell With It.

 

[Serafina1210]

Elementary Literotica security (probably a good idea for everyone, but essential for women):

Don't link your Lit account to your personal or business email. There are plenty of services that will give you an anonymous email account.

Don't give your real-world identity or any personal details to anyone you meet here, even people who seem very nice. Some people have multiple personalities, and in any case the security on the site isn't very sophisticated (they're not running a bank, after all).

If you get into any correspondence that involves sending word processor files, strip out personal information before sending them. MS Word makes this very easy.

I'm not suggesting that the person in question (I think I know who she is, and I miss her already) didn't do these things. I'm just saying that everyone should.

Anyone have anything to add to this list?

 

[Sammael Bard]

I've mentioned many times here lit can be an unfriendly place for women.

There are a lot of cool, decent guys on this site, but like with everything else its the creeps that set the tone.

There are a lot of men here who assume that because a woman is on this site she wants a daddy or to be tied and raped or to just act like a cyber slut and when the women refuse them they get called names.

A couple of months ago my wife was on here posting on a thread that had nothing to do with sex and someone sends her a PM about how he is going to bend her over, tie her up etc.., her reply was, "Not even a hello, its you're going to do this? Sorry, not interested"

This is what she got back.

oh look its mother teresa talkin! whom the fuck are you kidding you dirty cunt?! why the fuck else are you here?! for bible study?! why the fuck do you need a hi?! are you sitting in production meeting in the office. you are no good whore and you don't deserve any fucking pleasantaries. wake up from that dream Cinderella cunt. Its not 'can i ganbang you'.. its 'get to your business and only thing you are worthy of you cunt!' you know what.. you just established you are a fuckin hypocrite and hypocrites belong to my iggy bin so off you go cry to your daddy rotten cunt!

Cute,huh? And as this thread shows this is close to the norm.

And the site has a harassment rule does it not? But go to the site with that issue and the response is "that is what ignore is for."

So like anything else the site could give to shits what goes on here. The AH and other writing related forums are generally "safe" but any other forum is not friendly to women unless they are showing pics of their tits and want to act like a cyber whore.

But, again when the sites favorite word is cunt and it is used repeatedly by the owner why should anyone act any different?

There is a poster here who was in the GB and speaking with some guy for awhile, he wanted to masturbate together over skype, she said no. The person then started threads that she was a former poster(a male) who was a child molester and she was harassed repeatedly for awhile.

The sites freedom of speech policy is an excuse for cyber bullying and the site could care less, no surprise there.

I've said many times there is a sub culture here of abuse towards women, but either no one wants to believe me, or they would just rather not admit it.

Picture the comments LW trolls make on our stories then imagine that type of person stalking you here, because they are pretty much the same type. Scumbags in real life who live with mom or can;t get laid or get it up so they come here and act like this.

And typical of that type in my reply to the asshat who sent that to my wife, not only did he never reply, but that was two months ago and I have yet to see them post here again. I guess a coward is a coward even on the net.

Sorry about what happened with your wife, LC.

Women getting harassed isn't a new thing here on the cyberspace. The cloak of anonymity gives a lot of courage to some of the biggest losers on Earth.

And given its size, I don't expect anyone from Lit doing the babysitting job. We all have to fend for ourselves out here.

 

[Sammael Bard]

You can set up a dummy e-mail just for lit and in properties make it show up under a different name, a pen name for instance. I received rape threats after an LW story because they thought I was a woman.

Shame is there are a lot of women on here who have no problem flirting and role playing and talking slutty so I don;t know why they have to harass women who don;t want to.

Oh, wait, that's right because they are men and that is how it should be and literotica proves in many ways that it agrees with that.

That's what I would've done if I were in her shoes. I would've spammed their emails out of their PCs.

Unfortunately, she's not that type of person. In the email conversations that we had, she came off as a person who likes to leave it behind and move on. She's not the revenge type of person.

 

[Sammael Bard]

Elementary Literotica security (probably a good idea for everyone, but essential for women):

Don't link your Lit account to your personal or business email. There are plenty of services that will give you an anonymous email account.

Don't give your real-world identity or any personal details to anyone you meet here, even people who seem very nice. Some people have multiple personalities, and in any case the security on the site isn't very sophisticated (they're not running a bank, after all).

If you get into any correspondence that involves sending word processor files, strip out personal information before sending them. MS Word makes this very easy.

I'm not suggesting that the person in question (I think I know who she is, and I miss her already) didn't do these things. I'm just saying that everyone should.

Anyone have anything to add to this list?

How 'bout adding the 'not interested in chatting and mutual pleasing' part in their sig.?

 

[Bramblethorn]

Elementary Literotica security (probably a good idea for everyone, but essential for women):

Don't link your Lit account to your personal or business email. There are plenty of services that will give you an anonymous email account.

I recommend not using Gmail for this purpose. I set up a Gmail account specifically for Literotica stuff, using my personal email as the recovery address. When my brother uses his Gmail to send to my personal email, it helpfully attaches my nom de plume. It's also suggested my Literotica Gmail account as "somebody you might know" to various family members.

 

[oggbashan]

Even my alt jeanne_d_artois has had sexual propositions, despite being clearly identified as a fictional person, an alt of a male author, and over 60.

But I get unsolicited sexual propositions on all my email accounts whether those accounts are obviously male, or apparently female. My spam filter rejects most but oggbashan had some *interesting* suggestions yesterday from a source that claims to be a Russian blonde.

Apart from my physical inability because of my age and disabilities to perform the acts 'she' was proposing we should do, her condition was that I should send her my bank details to prove how 'genuine' I am.

I may be old and decrepit, but I'm not that stupid.

Unfortunately cyber abuse is not confined to Literotica.

 

[Serafina1210]

I recommend not using Gmail for this purpose. I set up a Gmail account specifically for Literotica stuff, using my personal email as the recovery address. When my brother uses his Gmail to send to my personal email, it helpfully attaches my nom de plume. It's also suggested my Literotica Gmail account as "somebody you might know" to various family members.

Agree. Google isn't interested in your silly desire for anonymity. Google assumes you want to proclaim everything about yourself to all the members of their social media empire (Lit using transvestite Baptist minister--why wouldn't you want the world to know?). They're as bad as Facebook.

I googled something like "free anonymous email" and found a good service that didn't ask for any information about me.

 

[Sammael Bard]

Agree. Google isn't interested in your silly desire for anonymity. Google assumes you want to proclaim everything about yourself to all the members of their social media empire (Lit using transvestite Baptist minister--why wouldn't you want the world to know?). They're as bad as Facebook.

I googled something like "free anonymous email" and found a good service that didn't ask for any information about me.

Alright, that got my attention.

Unless, I'm not keeping any sort of contact with my real email, what sort of info would I be giving out to others?

 

[Serafina1210]

Alright, that got my attention.

Unless, I'm not keeping any sort of contact with my real email, what sort of info would I be giving out to others?

Probably others here know more than I do, but I can offer an anecdote. I have separate business and personal email accounts. The personal account is Gmail. I never linked the two in any way. I write a good bit of email for both accounts on an Android phone. I have a teenage son whose Gmail account is linked to mine, and he uses his Minecraft avatar's name as a nickname on that account. Now my (Google) Android phone has decided that when I send business email from my phone, my son's avatar name will be in the header. So Google has linked my two email accounts via my phone, and imported a nickname from a third account.

It would be funnier if I knew what to do about it.

 

[Sammael Bard]

Probably others here know more than I do, but I can offer an anecdote. I have separate business and personal email accounts. The personal account is Gmail. I never linked the two in any way. I write a good bit of email for both accounts on an Android phone. I have a teenage son whose Gmail account is linked to mine, and he uses his Minecraft avatar's name as a nickname on that account. Now my (Google) Android phone has decided that when I send business email from my phone, my son's avatar name will be in the header. So Google has linked my two email accounts via my phone, and imported a nickname from a third account.

It would be funnier if I knew what to do about it.

Oh crap. If that's true, I don't have an idea how many people have seen my real name with my alias.

Shit.

 

[Serafina1210]

Oh crap. If that's true, I don't have an idea how many people have seen my real name with my alias.

Shit.

You might try sending yourself a few notes to see what's visible. But switching to an anonymous email account, unlinked to anything else in your life, would be a good move.

 

[GoddessFreya]

....So Google has linked my two email accounts via my phone, and imported a nickname from a third account.

It would be funnier if I knew what to do about it.

Didn't know that. Off to disable my gmail account.

BTW, are you sure that my google device won't link the anonymous account too?