cellis
Saucy
- Joined
- Oct 2, 2001
- Posts
- 4,186
This appeared in my inbox a couple of days ago.... and several of them fit...
Subject: GIGGLES
>
>
>Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
>
>A day without sunshine is like, night..
>
>On the other hand, you have different fingers.
>
>I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
>
>42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
>
>99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
>
>I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
>
>Honk if you love peace and quiet.
>
>Remember, half the people you know are below average.
>
>He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
>
>Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
>
>The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
>
>I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
>
>Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
>
>Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
>
>A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
>
>Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
>
>Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
>
>Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
>
>Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
>
>If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
>
>How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand...
>
>OK, so what's the speed of dark?
>
>How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
>
>If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
>
>When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
>
>Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
>
>Everyone has a photographic memory; Some just don't have film.
>
>If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
>
>Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
>
>What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
>
>I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out
>
>I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
>
>Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
>
>AND THE ONE I RELATE TO THE MOST THESE DAYS - - -
>
>Inside every older person is a younger person wondering "What
>happened?!"
>
Subject: GIGGLES
>
>
>Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
>
>A day without sunshine is like, night..
>
>On the other hand, you have different fingers.
>
>I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
>
>42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
>
>99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
>
>I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
>
>Honk if you love peace and quiet.
>
>Remember, half the people you know are below average.
>
>He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
>
>Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
>
>The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
>
>I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
>
>Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
>
>Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life.
>
>A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
>
>Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
>
>Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
>
>Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
>
>Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
>
>If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
>
>How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand...
>
>OK, so what's the speed of dark?
>
>How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
>
>If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
>
>When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
>
>Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
>
>Everyone has a photographic memory; Some just don't have film.
>
>If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
>
>Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
>
>What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
>
>I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out
>
>I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
>
>Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
>
>AND THE ONE I RELATE TO THE MOST THESE DAYS - - -
>
>Inside every older person is a younger person wondering "What
>happened?!"
>
