Joke of the Day

[*Eve*]

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You must be an engineer" said the balloonist. "I am"
replied the woman, "How did you know?" "Well" said the
balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct,
but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the
fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all.
If anything, you've delayed my trip."
The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."
"I am" replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well" said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where

you're going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity
of hot air. You made a promise, which you have no idea how to
keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."

 

[Guest]

Heh!

A knockout young lady decided she wanted to get rich quick, so she proceeded to find herself a rich 75-year-old man, planning to screw him to death on their wedding night.

The courtship and wedding went off without any problem, in spite of the half-century age difference. The first night of her honeymoon, she got undressed and waited for him to come out of the bathroom to come to bed.

When he emerged, however, he had nothing on except a condom to cover a twelve-inch erection, and was carrying a pair of earplugs and a pair of nose plugs.

Fearing her plan had gone desperately amiss, she asked, "What are those for?"

The elderly groom replied, "There are two things I can't stand: the sound of a woman screaming, and the smell of burning rubber."

 

[Weird Harold]

You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude." "You must be an engineer" said the balloonist.

She's more than an engineer, she's a miracle worker -- 40N, 60W is in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean!.

(Just being picky, because the Lat/Long was obviously picked at random.)

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Joke of the Day

She's more than an engineer, she's a miracle worker -- 40N, 60W is in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean!.

(Just being picky, because the Lat/Long was obviously picked at random.)

There's always a smart-ass in every crowd.....looks around.

 

[*Eve*]

Re: Re: Joke of the Day

She's more than an engineer, she's a miracle worker -- 40N, 60W is in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean!.

(Just being picky, because the Lat/Long was obviously picked at random.)

Lol, shhhh it's our little secret