I've finally came to a conclusion..

[freakyhurley]

I just cannot fuckin stand women anymore.They say
all they want is a nice guy...blah blah blah!!With
ya liying selfs.

I've always been a really nice guy when it comes to
women...yet...I allways seem to get treated like shit,
why that?Oh I supposed I just haven't found the right
girl....bullshit!

I've heard the womens comments enough that I'm totally
sick of them and I wish I was never around a women cause
all they fuckin do is pull your chain.

 

[Destroyah1981]

and.

I am destroyah1981 I dunno how i ended up with two
ids for this board.

 

[Cheyenne]

Have a bad day, Brian?

 

[R Nitelight]

freakyhurley

When you feed women a smooth line like that, how can they resist?

 

[Earthmuffin]

Ummmmmmmmm

So go for the girl who says she likes "bad boys"?

I doubt seriously you'll see much change. If you're meant to be with someone, so be it. Women are complex critters. I should know, I am one!!

 

[Laurel]

Good things come to those who wait.

You can't fight the river.

and all those other great cliches.

In short, the more you look for something, the harder it is to find. The first time you stop looking and move on with your life, POW!, there it'll be.

And if you expect people to be assholes, you will find assholes. The world is, by the last census's numbers, 95% assholes. If you expect them to be interesting and good and kind, that's what you will get.

I'm in the process to responding to your letter, FH. I'm just busier than a tortoise in a hibiscus bush.

Speaking of torts, I've gotta run. It just started raining outside, and I need to go put the cover on their enclosure. I'll tell 'em you all said hi.

 

[JinxLove]

There are still nice guys left out there? Haven't run into one in a while. But I'll take your word on it and keep the hope up. If you're really a nice guy, you'll find somebody. Don't settle for the girls (and they are out there) who'll use that against you and exploit your kindness. Hang in there. Something'll come up.

 

[Stormystarr]

Well, the only advice I can give you is to be nice, reguardless of what they say or do. Yes, some women do secretly like the bad boys, but you can usually tell who they are after talking to them for about 10 minutes. If thats not what you want, then just keep moving on until you find a woman with the qualities you are looking for.

 

[Roll-One]

I don't understand

I'm a nice guy and i don't have any problems, it might be your approach or the way you handle yourself around the ladies... just a thought

 

[*Eve*]

You are probably hanging out in the wrong places and let me say this. A lot of men will go for that air head bimbo type and then wonder what went wrong. I'm not saying you are but obviously you're not picking the right girls to hit on. Most women do want nice guys and part of the problem is that they have to go through the bad ones in order to appreciate the good ones.

 

[lala]

well, as i see it you have to options

one- go gay (i heard that ew, some people like it!)
two- bitch for awhile, and realise you'd like to get laid this century, and go back out and stop hitting on the cutest one!

if you want a partner, someone to love, then don't search out the one with the best tits. when you're old and grey you'll try to trip her when she's using her walker, and she'll try to turn off your oxygen,... it'll get ugly!

if you just want a nice rack either pay for it, or don't bitch about them treating you like shit!

ok, that's my rant

*pat pat* it'll be ok kiddo,... you'll figger it out,... hopefully before you die

 

[chal13]

There is some truth in what you saying.

Why do some girls complain that all the nice guys are taken, then run past ten of them to throw herself at some total ass hole? The kind of guy who at the very least will abuse her mentally,and sometimes phyically.
Then if this ass falls in love with her and stop treating her like shit, she drops him like a used rubber. I've seen it happen many many times. These girls have big time issues, and I feel for them. But it kind of cool seeing the tables turned on the ass holes.

 

[Laurel]

I dunno, I don't agree. I think the vast majority of women do like 'nice' guys. However, 'nice' to a girl means that the guy listens to what they have to say, pays attention to them, and treats them with respect. Many guys THINK they're 'nice', but in actuality they don't put the time and effort into 'wooing' a girl that's necessary. I don't mean buying them crap - I mean paying attention to them. This is THE BIGGEST MISTAKE guys make. Therefore, they come across as cold or disinterested or conceited, even though inside they're 'nice guys'.

This is gonna sound sexist, but it's how I see it... Conversation plays more of a factor in the initial attraction for women than it does for men. For most guys I know, if the girl is cute and doesn't act like a total bitch, she's game. For example, I've never had a guy complain "Oh, she's pretty and all, but she doesn't pay enough attention to MY problems."

Women like to be wooed. We like to be doted upon. Chatting up is important. Many men lose out not because they're less attractive, but because they spend too much time in that crucial 'first impression' phase complaining about THEIR problems or talking about themselves - or because they don't put effort into talking at all , which comes across as they don't care about the girl. They may consider themselves 'nice guys', and they very well may be so, but if they don't take the time to show (or fake, even) an interest in what the girl has to say.

This is a big problem with younger guys who haven't figured out the power of conversation. They'll see some other older guy who they perceive as an asshole succeed where they fail and not realize that the difference is approach. It doesn't mean you have to be a 'player'. It means you have to come across as confident, friendly, and genuine, even in defeat. Getting whiny and irritated when the girl says 'no' does not get you plus points.

The most important men in my life have not been the most attractive - they have had healthy doses of charisma. Charisma is not something that can be forced or faked. Some men have more than others. If you're a man who doesn't have tons of natural charisma - if you have difficulty chatting a girl up, finding the right thing to say - you can make up for it by being attentive, genuine, friendly, fun.

Smile a lot, make eye contact. Look into her face (not at her chest, or at her legs, or at the ground) when you're talking to her, AND when she's talking to you. Ask questions about her, listen to the answers, then ask more questions based on what she says. When she asks you questions, answer her honestly, and then use your answer to ask HER another question about HERSELF. This is tremendously flattering to a girl, and tremendously effective. Don't talk too much about your own insecurities or personal problems - at least, not till the two of you are closer. If she does talk about her personal problems or insecurities, be comforting and supportive and complimentary.

Even if you don't feel confident, act confident - don't slouch or slink away. What's amazing is that confidence is self-perpetuating - you act confident, the girl perceives you as confident and thus responds positively, then you feel more confident.

Some women will be swayed by a cute guy despite the fact that he's an arrogant jerk. Many men will be swayed by a pretty girl even if she acts like a full-on bitch. It goes both ways. However, those are extremes. I think most of us look for a balance in physical attraction and personality. Some people are made uglier by their personalities, some are made better looking. It DOES make a difference, and if you're single and looking for a partner, you're foolish to spend time on your appearance and not on coming across as a good, confident, fun, genuine person. The fact is that very few of us are going to 'get' every mate we want. By the same token, we will all at some point turn down mates that just don't click for us. However, the first impression is damn important - it can make or break the deal.

I think if we truly do want to have a successful relationship with the opposite sex, we need to not get bitter make generalizations when we fail, such as "Guys just want big-tit whores" or "Girls just want to date assholes". It doesn't mean we have to take every rejection personally, as most aren't personal. Sometimes it just doesn't happen. But we should evaluate each situation and ask ourselves: was I too hurried or too pushy? Did I listen and respond appropriately? Did I turn into a whiny brat when I felt like he/she rejected me? If you see in retrospect mistakes you might have made, then make mental notes of them and try to avoid those mistakes in the future. If you did your best and the girl still said no, then it wasn't meant to happen - she didn't feel what you felt.

Relationships are complicated things. However, getting one started is even tougher unless you realize the differences between what men and women expect, and how they communicate. If you expect women to have the same needs as men, you will fail.

Another babbly, rambling post brought to you by Laurel.

 

[Jester]

All hail the wise madame of the board!!

*bowing as I exit*

P.S.- good things aren't always/ever easy, that's part of the deal

 

[Mustang Sally]

Yeah? Well right about now I could get into a real good rant about how there's no such thing as a "nice" guy.
Nice guy? Impossible! That's an oxy moron.

I went for the nice guy last time. He was a sweetheart and treated me well, but cheated every chance he got. When I finally found out, I felt like a complete idiot. Oh, by the way, he owes me close to a thousand bucks and isn't returning my phone calls. AND he's somehow blaming ME that it didn't work out! I'm worse than an idiot. I'm a moron! Blind and braindead. He's not even good looking!

And why are all men so obsessed with sex?? Ok, I like it too. I like it quite a lot, actually, but it would be nice to feel like more than a sex object just once in awhile. And I'm not even sexy! I'd HATE to see how women with great bods get treated.

 

[Mustang Sally]

Ahem. Just read Laurel's mega post there and feel a little silly. She's absolutely right, of course. Very well said, Laurel. I just needed to bitch a bit, and this seemed like a good place to do so. LOL

So just ignore me. <returning to the shadows to lurk>

 

[Laurel]

LMAO! No, please - feel free to bitch away! I do.

Jester - Bingo on dat last line dere

 

[Vlad]

I have to say that most(not all) of the women that I have been nice to have reciprocated in like kind. In other words, they treat me as good or better than I treat them.

Guess I've been lucky--I LOVE WOMEN!