I've experimented with 3rd person

[EmilyMiller]

I've played with 3rd Person
As its smoking fetish base, I don't think anyone is particularly interested!

https://literotica.com/s/im-an-innocence-thief

But I've written this from the perspective of "addiction" as slightly different angle. Almost like Book Thief is narrated by "death".

Feedback and honest criticism is appreciated.

As I feel bad for derailing this thread…

I’ve only dabbled with third person once. My The Kiss series (which I need to finish). Not only is it third person, it’s lesbian. So fucking crazy keeping track of things. She / her can be two people. Some of the paragraphs have the FMCs names in three times each.

I’m not a good enough writer to pull that off.

Em

 

[djrip]

As I feel bad for derailing this thread…

I’ve only dabbled with third person once. My The Kiss series (which I need to finish). Not only is it third person, it’s lesbian. So fucking crazy keeping track of things. She / her can be two people. Some of the paragraphs have the FMCs names in three times each.

I’m not a good enough writer to pull that off.

Em

In my twins story I gave them both names with plenty of variations. Cassandra, Cassie, Cas. Kelly and Kel. Also stuff like 'her sister did such and such.'

I've only done 3rd person so far. But it's always very close third. I don't find that close 3rd is much different from 1st when it comes to being in a character's head, experiencing what they experience, knowing only what they know.

 

[EmilyMiller]

In my twins story I gave them both names with plenty of variations. Cassandra, Cassie, Cas. Kelly and Kel. Also stuff like 'her sister did such and such.'

I've only done 3rd person so far. But it's always very close third. I don't find that close 3rd is much different from 1st when it comes to being in a character's head, experiencing what they experience, knowing only what they know.

I like first person. It’s not just familarity and having guard rails. I like the option of things being hidden from the reader as they are hidden from the narrator.

In Caputpedes, I swapped narrator precisely so that the first FMCs true intentions were masked. I could have made her an unreliable narrator, but that wasn’t in keeping with the rest of the story.

Em

 

[djrip]

I like first person. It’s not just familarity and having guard rails. I like the option of things being hidden from the reader as they are hidden from the narrator.

In Caputpedes, I swapped narrator precisely so that the first FMCs true intentions were masked. I could have made her an unreliable narrator, but that wasn’t in keeping with the rest of the story.

Em

I like that aspect, too, but I find it can be similar with close 3rd. I swapped back and forth between the twins as viewpoint characters for instance. What I think 1st really does that 3rd can't (except perhaps for thoughts here and there) is make the reader feel like the character is telling the story in their own voice, which can be powerful. Or extra hot. Or snarky, lots of possibilities

 

[SimonDoom]

I like that aspect, too, but I find it can be similar with close 3rd. I swapped back and forth between the twins as viewpoint characters for instance. What I think 1st really does that 3rd can't (except perhaps for thoughts here and there) is make the reader feel like the character is telling the story in their own voice, which can be powerful. Or extra hot. Or snarky, lots of possibilities

Third person is far more flexible. That's one of the reasons I often use it. But first person's LACK of flexibility can be a strength as well. In a way it's easier, because as the narrator you are forced to stay inside the POV character's head. With third person it takes more effort to stay there. I'm still learning the details of free indirect/close style, and it can be tricky to do right.

 

[alohadave]

guard rails.

Way off topic, but when did this become a thing? I've seen it in a bunch of different places in the last month or two, and never saw it used before.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Way off topic, but when did this become a thing? I've seen it in a bunch of different places in the last month or two, and never saw it used before.

Don’t know, hun.

Em

 

[Bazzle]

I love that this thread has totally gone off topic...whats new pussy cat...
I just assume some *might* have read the story...and be very much disappointed compared to what @EmilyMiller suggested that it was!

Seeing as its my worst score of all 49 stories that I have put out there! ;(

 

[EmilyMiller]

I love that this thread has totally gone off topic...whats new pussy cat...
I just assume some *might* have read the story...and be very much disappointed compared to what @EmilyMiller suggested that it was!

Sorry - yet again .

Em

 

[onehitwanda]

Because I'm not one to try to prevent a good derailing turning into a crashendo, I'm going to throw some fuel on the fire and state that while I've been nude around multiple people before I can't say I've ever engaged in anything sexual with more than one person at a time.

Does that make me first-person central or third-person peripheral?

 

[Bazzle]

Because I'm not one to try to prevent a good derailing turning into a crashendo, I'm going to throw some fuel on the fire and state that while I've been nude around multiple people before I can't say I've ever engaged in anything sexual with more than one person at a time.

Does that make me first-person central or third-person peripheral?

Surely you've been skinny dipping with your mates?
How more naked around others without sex do you need to be?

 

[yowser]

Does that make me first-person central or third-person peripheral?

Trans Siberian

 

[onehitwanda]

Surely you've been skinny dipping with your mates?
How more naked around others without sex do you need to be?

In no particular order (because of the unordered list, HA!)

• cooking (we were all too lazy to get dressed after, amazingly enough, skinny dipping. The men in the group were very amusing when I started peeling carrots.)
• hiking - if you're over a hundred kilometers from the nearest settlement and you're crossing rivers relatively frequently and you're all friends, well, it's just easier than having to stop every time.
• sailing camps as a student - nobody has ever invented a way to make sailors keep their kit on when they're off in the bush for a long weekend and the most high-brow alcohol we had was Russian Bear.
• sauna sessions

I mention all this for science only, obviously.

 

[onehitwanda]

Trans Siberian

Are you're saying I'm a frigid wasteland?

 

[yowser]

Are you're saying I'm a frigid wasteland?

Maybe a turgid waist land.

 

[onehitwanda]

Maybe a turgid waist land.

chocolate is a weakness of mine.

 

[theWollstonecraftWoman]

The third-person narrative gives you the luxury of being able to be more than one person's feelings. But the depth of feeling you can express is more intimate in first-person.