It's all fun and games until you find a relative on fetlife

They probably found you first, following your comments.

Nah, I have no identifiable info or pictures up; they IDIOTICALLY used a professional headshot that my SO took. I recognized it instantly.
 
So much for saying "Wow, you too?"

Seems like either you are ashamed of your kink or you think they should be ashamed of theirs. Either way this should not be as big a deal as you are making it. And you should have your glass house looked at; I think you may have rendered it structurally unstable.
 
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