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Some of the initial post-mortem findings are consistent with what I know of Valley Fever, but, well, we just don't know. Or I should say, they just don't know yet. My father and my sister just had her cat put down today. She'd been sick for awhile. *cries softly*
Sometimes, I wish I didn't live in my body. I wish I could turn off part of my brain and just simply exist. *sigh*

I wonder sometimes if writing is a way of remembering or a way of forgetting. Lately, as I put the words on the page, it feels like an exorcism of old ghosts. When I've put them on the page, they no longer exist in my heart. Or do they?
My sister sent out pics of Meesha's last day...in a couple of them she actually looks okay, happy even. But one of those pics is when she's sitting on the table at the vet's office just before they put her down...did she know? Did she know her suffering was going to be over soon? Or was she happy because she was with people she loved and trusted to care for her, people she knew would never harm her? What goes through the mind of a pet in those last moments at the vet's office, before they close their eyes forever? Relief? Betrayal? Thanks? One last flush of adoration for their owners? A combination? Nothing at all? *sobbing*

My sister sent out pics of Meesha's last day...in a couple of them she actually looks okay, happy even. But one of those pics is when she's sitting on the table at the vet's office just before they put her down...did she know? Did she know her suffering was going to be over soon? Or was she happy because she was with people she loved and trusted to care for her, people she knew would never harm her? What goes through the mind of a pet in those last moments at the vet's office, before they close their eyes forever? Relief? Betrayal? Thanks? One last flush of adoration for their owners? A combination? Nothing at all? *sobbing*



Happy B-day darling girl! It's already been a whole year...welcome to toddlerhood.
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I believe it's what always seems to communicate itself through their purring and their wagging tales, "I love you and I trust you. I know you will do what is best for me, even if it's the hardest thing you ever have to do."
*hugs*![]()
* Hugs *
I know cases were it was obvious they showed their love for their owner in their last moments. I'm sure she understood and agreed.
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My son's little league, where I coached for so many years, is going to the US Finals on Sat. Kids I coached or coached against will be playing on ABC.
I'm giddy. This is so freakin' cool!
I have this interesting burn on my hand. I got it when I accidentally spilt boiling water onto it while holding a cup (into which I was pouring the boiling water). It's mottled red with dashes of burgundy; it almost just looks like I haven't washed in a while –either that, or a bruise. It suits me, as do all my scars; both internal and external.
On an unrelated note, why does the comment, "I've heard a lot about you," make me nervous?




How much more sadness must I endure? I did not think that I could possibly bear anymore, but yet more comes and more comes and I feel that I will crumble.....



McK !!!!!!!
*Leapingflyingtacklehugs*
You've got to find a better tree with wifi.![]()
*pokes the dirty old man*
*hugs the McKenna*
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