Isolated Blurt Thread

[RedHairedandFriendly]

ETA: get out there woman. Join a creative writing or book group, take up a new hobby, do something - anything- that gets you meeting new people. Sure, you won;t be good enough friends with them for a while to accommodate your running away plan, but you need to have good things happening in your day to day life, especially as all your kids must be at school most of the day now and you have nothing to do except housework and think about your situation, am I right? Whether you're gonna stay or go you need to start building yourself a social life. And them's orders missie.
x
V

I believe step one is finding a job. I have access to all the accounts, but like I said, I won't strip him financially, that is just wrong.

 

[MercyMia]

I'm really happy for her publication!

 

[Misty_Morning]

I believe step one is finding a job. I have access to all the accounts, but like I said, I won't strip him financially, that is just wrong.

While you may think that it is best to be the "better" person, do NOT get carriesd away with that notion. It is a mind set that often plagues people going through divorces....it WILL come back to haunt you, I promise you that.

Be sure to make copies of ALL financial documents. Don't wait for the attorney or a judge to request a forensic accountant to look into the matter, things will be long gone by then.

My suggestion...take half of everything NOW. Then let the court decide.

While I am financially secure because of my own abilities, I walked away from more than 2 million dollars that should have been my half of the finances because my ex was such a fucking bastard and I justed wanted out. If I had followed the advice I give to you, I'd have what should have been mine, and the divorce would habe been settled much quicker.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

While you may think that it is best to be the "better" person, do NOT get carriesd away with that notion. It is a mind set that often plagues people going through divorces....it WILL come back to haunt you, I promise you that.

Be sure to make copies of ALL financial documents. Don't wait for the attorney or a judge to request a forensic accountant to look into the matter, things will be long gone by then.

My suggestion...take half of everything NOW. Then let the court decide.

While I am financially secure because of my own abilities, I walked away from more than 2 million dollars that should have been my half of the finances because my ex was such a fucking bastard and I justed wanted out. If I had followed the advice I give to you, I'd have what should have been mine, and the divorce would habe been settled much quicker.

It is funny to sit and think I am entitled to half, since I didn't work or add income into the coffers. I mean it is through his employment we have stocks and I believe those are even in his name. All things are in his name, but a couple loans, one credit card, and most of the utility bills.

I'm thinking a temporary separation would be smart, because then I can decide if this is definitely what I want. Deep down though, even if he told me he'd go to counseling or he'd "change" . . .I don't believe I want him at all. The love for him as my husband, lover, friend is gone, in its place is respect for him as a father and provider.

 

[impressive]

Where do I start? *sigh* I've made the decision to go. . . but where does one go when there are no friends close by, no money that is yours, and you are about to be labeled a selfish woman and disappoint so many. Where do I go now that I have realized it is time?

You will find the strength, beautiful.

Now, if we only had that Lit-Island, you could move there ... live in sarongs (if that much), eat tropical fruit from the mini-orchard on the property and fresh catch-of-the-day, dance around the bonfire on the beach in the evening, and sleep to the sound of the surf.

*sigh*

 

[Misty_Morning]

It is funny to sit and think I am entitled to half, since I didn't work or add income into the coffers. I mean it is through his employment we have stocks and I believe those are even in his name. All things are in his name, but a couple loans, one credit card, and most of the utility bills.

I'm thinking a temporary separation would be smart, because then I can decide if this is definitely what I want. Deep down though, even if he told me he'd go to counseling or he'd "change" . . .I don't believe I want him at all. The love for him as my husband, lover, friend is gone, in its place is respect for him as a father and provider.

WRONG, WRONG, WRONG....you provided him with the stability of a home and raised his kids. DO NOT belittle your role in the marriage.

You will be amazed at how people become greedy when it comes to divorce.

At least go see a divorce attorney, a good one, before saying anything to anyone. PLEASE.

 

[impressive]

It is funny to sit and think I am entitled to half, since I didn't work or add income into the coffers. I mean it is through his employment we have stocks and I believe those are even in his name. All things are in his name, but a couple loans, one credit card, and most of the utility bills.

I'm thinking a temporary separation would be smart, because then I can decide if this is definitely what I want. Deep down though, even if he told me he'd go to counseling or he'd "change" . . .I don't believe I want him at all. The love for him as my husband, lover, friend is gone, in its place is respect for him as a father and provider.

TIP #1: Start to establish credit in your name NOW. Open a checking account in just your name. Add a debit/credit card to it. Use it regularly (even if it's just 1-2 small charges each month) and pay it in full each bill. You'll need a credit history when it comes time to fly solo.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

WRONG, WRONG, WRONG....you provided him with the stability of a home and raised his kids. DO NOT belittle your role in the marriage.

You will be amazed at how people become greedy when it comes to divorce.

At least go see a divorce attorney, a good one, before saying anything to anyone. PLEASE.

I shall, it is just kinda raw having sat back and realized where I am right now. *hugs* Thank you.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

TIP #1: Start to establish credit in your name NOW. Open a checking account in just your name. Add a debit/credit card to it. Use it regularly (even if it's just 1-2 small charges each month) and pay it in full each bill. You'll need a credit history when it comes time to fly solo.

I will do that this weekend. Thank you.

 

[deathlynx]

I will do that this weekend. Thank you.

Today woman!
Seriously though, remember that banks are only open 9-noon on Saturday...
*hugs* You know I'm here for any moral support, advice and anything else I can give...I'd give more if I could...You know that...

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Today woman!
Seriously though, remember that banks are only open 9-noon on Saturday...
*hugs* You know I'm here for any moral support, advice and anything else I can give...I'd give more if I could...You know that...

I meant Friday. That is when my cash is available to me. I'll withdraw mine and put some in an account. I do have the one credit card in my name already established, it is small, but it is in my name only.

Moral support is what I am going to need.

 

[McKenna]

~There's snow predicted for elevations above 4500 feet. I have crocus and "glory of the snow" blooming in my garden. How appropriate.

~I absolutely love him because he's never given up on me, and better yet, he's never allowed me to give up on myself.

~Today I send out my first invoice. The life of a contractor/freelancer is full of thrills.

 

[rgraham666]

~There's snow predicted for elevations above 4500 feet. I have crocus and "glory of the snow" blooming in my garden. How appropriate.

~I absolutely love him because he's never given up on me, and better yet, he's never allow me to give up on myself.

~Today I send out my first invoice. The life of a contractor/freelancer is full of thrills.

Yay McKenna. I'm so happy for you.

 

[McKenna]

Yay McKenna. I'm so happy for you.

Nuts, I just saw a typo in the post you quoted. Now I'm going to obsess about it so much I'll forget to write something wiity here in reply. Crap. Tuesday suddenly feels like Monday.






( )

 

[sophia jane]

I wish self-esteem came in a pill. I'm tired of the inner monologue of self-loathing. I don't remember anymore what it feels like to be confident or to feel attractive or sexy or desirable.

And on a related note, all these Chicago threads reaffirm why I chose to stay home. I don't fit.

 

[_Lynn_]

I wish self-esteem came in a pill. I'm tired of the inner monologue of self-loathing. I don't remember anymore what it feels like to be confident or to feel attractive or sexy or desirable.

And on a related note, all these Chicago threads reaffirm why I chose to stay home. I don't fit.

 

[_Lynn_]

Whatever you do, don't let them see your fear.

Thank you...and for the record, the meeting with the lawyer went well.

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

YUCKY.... I don't wanna drink that grape juice. . .

 

[Fallenfromgrace]

I posted my blurt in the mood, and so i figure i should post my mood here

My mood is happy- that Zade is home and a lot happier about it too.

And also wanting... hell woman, you're gettin it tonight...

 

[CrimsonMaiden]

All categories filled!

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

All categories filled!

Congratulations!!!

 

[Fallenfromgrace]

Congratulations!!!

Btw, i figure ive missed something but i have guessed. Best of luck sweetie we're all here for you and i have a wanting PM and EMAIL inbox with plenty of space for you should you find you want it

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Btw, i figure ive missed something but i have guessed. Best of luck sweetie we're all here for you and i have a wanting PM and EMAIL inbox with plenty of space for you should you find you want it

Thank you Fallen. *hugs* I am going to do one thing at a time, the first is finding a job, which requires updating my resume, which I did, now I just need to get the damn printer to work.

 

[CrimsonMaiden]

Thank you Fallen. *hugs* I am going to do one thing at a time, the first is finding a job, which requires updating my resume, which I did, now I just need to get the damn printer to work.

Good luck, Red. After 8 years as a stay at home mom, I will soon be out looking for a job (since hubby refuses to find a better one) too. I don't even want to think how hard it's going to be in a such a small town to find something I can do.

How big is your area? What kind of job will you be looking for?

 

[RedHairedandFriendly]

Good luck, Red. After 8 years as a stay at home mom, I will soon be out looking for a job (since hubby refuses to find a better one) too. I don't even want to think how hard it's going to be in a such a small town to find something I can do.

How big is your area? What kind of job will you be looking for?

I've been out of the work force for 13 years. I have education in Business Administration, so I'll look for something along receptionist, payroll/accounting, scheduling, banks, offices... etc... something around there.

My town is very small, but the larger cities are anywhere from 20 min. to 45 min. away. I do know of a RediMed that needs a receptionist M-F 8-4 and those are the hours I truly want. So I will head out there first and then do the rounds to various places.