Isn't that interesting...

[Cathleen]

There is no end to interesting topics to discuss. This can be a sort of potpourri thread ('I'll take potourri for $1,000. please Alex').

Tonight I was reminded of a conversation I had with a friend about graduation gifts some people are giving to their children. I was shocked to hear that breast implants and other cosmetic surgeries have become no out of the ordinary gifts. Would you give your 18 year old child a gift like that? (My folks gave me luggage - a subtle hint maybe? )

I'm watching 20/20 about cosmetic procedures - done in Costa Rica and I'm sitting here a little too interested because of the prices....

Interesting...

 

[done_got_old]

There is no end to interesting topics to discuss. This can be a sort of potpourri thread ('I'll take potourri for $1,000. please Alex').

Tonight I was reminded of a conversation I had with a friend about graduation gifts some people are giving to their children. I was shocked to hear that breast implants and other cosmetic surgeries have become no out of the ordinary gifts. Would you give your 18 year old child a gift like that? (My folks gave me luggage - a subtle hint maybe? )

I'm watching 20/20 about cosmetic procedures - done in Costa Rica and I'm sitting here a little too interested because of the prices....

Interesting...

I wouldn't give my 18-year-old cosmetic surgery. If she/he wanted it, they'd have to get a job and pay for it themselves.

I don't remember what I got for high school graduation. Was it that long ago?

 

[Cathleen]

I wouldn't give my 18-year-old cosmetic surgery. If she/he wanted it, they'd have to get a job and pay for it themselves.

I don't remember what I got for high school graduation. Was it that long ago?

I don't know how I knew this, but I knew you'd be first here. It is so nice to see you about.

I wouldn't do it either - at any time I don't think. I think we need to mature before those kind of things are considered. (Unless it is for health reasons, of course.) There have been studies that now show our brain is not fully formed until around the age of 30. Now at 25 I would have thought that to be hogwash, but now see it clearly (in my case).

The luggage I received was for college - they seemed to think I should get on with my life. lol I went home to live for a few years - surprise!

 

[Eilan]

'I'll take potourri for $1,000. please Alex'

A category about smelly stuff? (Sorry. I couldn't resist. I've seen The Fairly Oddparents one too many times.)

My hubby has a coworker who would do well to give his daughter a nose job for graduation, but only because, unfortunately for her, she inherited HIS nose.

There's no way I would consider anything like that for my kids, though.

 

[Cathleen]

A category about smelly stuff? (Sorry. I couldn't resist. I've seen The Fairly Oddparents one too many times.)

My hubby has a coworker who would do well to give his daughter a nose job for graduation, but only because, unfortunately for her, she inherited HIS nose.

There's no way I would consider anything like that for my kids, though.

I haven't seen that movie - I take it the kids love it.

I understand there is need and it sounds like it would help his daughter. But I'm like you, for only vanity, nope. They can do it on their own.

I wonder what kind of questions, etc a doctor would ask of the patient and the parents requesting the surgery. I know it's a business and all and I'd guess there are some docs that wouldn't ask a thing. But I think most would have some kind of screening so to speak.

It just doesn't seem like a good message to learn at those young ages. Life is tough, there are lots of things that you can't change - you have to learn to harness your strength of character.

edit: Elian, I recently saw a 'Murphy Brown' episode - that was a fun and well writen show.

 

[EJFan]

i was a little taken aback by the one girl who said how much her self-confidence improved since she got the implants. this, to me, is the reverse side of the "barbi syndrome" that everyone complains about (and i don't buy, personally).

carlin said (about volvos), "first you learn to drive, THEN you get your safe car." same thing goes here... first you get your self confidence, THEN you tweak your physical being to match it (rather than the other way 'round).

 

[LadyJeanne]

i was a little taken aback by the one girl who said how much her self-confidence improved since she got the implants. this, to me, is the reverse side of the "barbi syndrome" that everyone complains about (and i don't buy, personally).

carlin said (about volvos), "first you learn to drive, THEN you get your safe car." same thing goes here... first you get your self confidence, THEN you tweak your physical being to match it (rather than the other way 'round).

I am totally opposed to breast implants, so I would never consider that for an 18 year old who is still growing, physically, emotionally, and intellectually.

I'm actually appalled that implants are considered a gift. An implant only has a certain lifespan, 20 years maximum and that's generous. How many times is she going to have to get those replaced in her lifetime? How many surgeries?

And I'm appalled that parents are buying into the quick surgery fix. What does that teach their daughters - that they are right in focusing on their breasts for self-esteem?

 

[done_got_old]

I don't know how I knew this, but I knew you'd be first here. It is so nice to see you about.

I wouldn't do it either - at any time I don't think. I think we need to mature before those kind of things are considered. (Unless it is for health reasons, of course.) There have been studies that now show our brain is not fully formed until around the age of 30. Now at 25 I would have thought that to be hogwash, but now see it clearly (in my case).

The luggage I received was for college - they seemed to think I should get on with my life. lol I went home to live for a few years - surprise!

That is surprising, thinking I'd be the first when I make only 2 or 3 posts most weeks.

I have a friend who's (then) wife let their 17-year-old daughter have breast reduction surgery. He was against it because he thought she was too young and thought she should try shedding some of the excess weight first. The daughter is now in her thirties and has more than a dozen surgeries on her breasts....... I think if you'd ask her now, she say that Daddy did know best.

 

[Cathleen]

That is surprising, thinking I'd be the first when I make only 2 or 3 posts most weeks.

I have a friend who's (then) wife let their 17-year-old daughter have breast reduction surgery. He was against it because he thought she was too young and thought she should try shedding some of the excess weight first. The daughter is now in her thirties and has more than a dozen surgeries on her breasts....... I think if you'd ask her now, she say that Daddy did know best.

I don't know how I knew - I was thinking about you and then checked to see if you'd been around and noticed how seldom you had posted.... odd isn't it?

A friend of mine from college had reduction and gratefully things went well. She had wanted it years before she got it, the doc wouldn't consider it until she was 25.

 

[Cathleen]

I am totally opposed to breast implants, so I would never consider that for an 18 year old who is still growing, physically, emotionally, and intellectually.

I'm actually appalled that implants are considered a gift. An implant only has a certain lifespan, 20 years maximum and that's generous. How many times is she going to have to get those replaced in her lifetime? How many surgeries?

And I'm appalled that parents are buying into the quick surgery fix. What does that teach their daughters - that they are right in focusing on their breasts for self-esteem?

Bingo! I whole heartedly agree.

 

[done_got_old]

I don't know how I knew - I was thinking about you and then checked to see if you'd been around and noticed how seldom you had posted.... odd isn't it?

A friend of mine from college had reduction and gratefully things went well. She had wanted it years before she got it, the doc wouldn't consider it until she was 25.

I visit and check my messages almost everyday. Rarely do I post. I don't know what made me visit today. I was looking for the receipts for my travelers checks. Actually I was trying to retrace my steps.......... they were under the keyboard. Why did I put them there? I guess I done got old!

I'll be gone for a few days. I'm going to Mexico for a bit of rest and relaxation.

 

[Cathleen]

I visit and check my messages almost everyday. Rarely do I post. I don't know what made me visit today. I was looking for the receipts for my travelers checks. Actually I was trying to retrace my steps.......... they were under the keyboard. Why did I put them there? I guess I done got old!

I'll be for a few days. I'm going to Mexico for a bit of rest and relaxation.

Have a safe and wonderful trip. I'm glad to know you're not too far from Lit.

 

[Cathleen]

Here is another thing that I've been considering. The 'Runaway Bride'. I have no problem with her cold feet but I do think she handled it terribily, that is an understatement actually.

The lies about being kidnapped, allowing her parents and loved ones to go through hell thinking horrible things. All of that - really bad decision. OK, I sure have made some dosies too (not to THAT extent but....).

So why is she getting $500K to tell her story? Talk about rewarding stupid behavior. I wouldn't watch a movie or read a book about her actions. I didn't and won't read Amber Frey's book about her relationship with Scott Peterson. I know publishers and movie producers hope I'll read/watch and their job is to put out books and movies but I'm not interested.

But the bigger question to me is HER behavior now - now that she is home. I just can't imagine tring to make a buck off that situation. Are the people that love her shocked? Are they encouraging it? What kind of advice is she receiving...... do people around her care?

This is a major stretch but Michael Jackson.... nuts, yes. The thing I don't understand is all the people around him profess their love for him etc. Why didn't they do something to intervene 20 years ago and say to him 'Micheal, you're getting weird.' If my brother, loved one, began to act in bizzar ways I'd say something, help somehow.

How can people be quiet when they see their loved one do outrageous things? I just can't imagine doing nothing to help.

 

[Cathleen]

Please feel free to post what you're finding interesting too.

 

[wicked woman]

To answer your original question...hell no!

Breast reduction may have it's medical reasons...breast augmentation rarely does. Frankly I'd think I did a pretty shitty job as a parent if my 18 year old daughter even wanted breast implants. Like to think I brought her up so she was happy within her own skin and her self confidence and self esteem didn't come from her cup size.

As for high school graduation gifts...I got taken out to dinner. Period. Doing well at school was considered my job...it was expected of me. No present for doing it. No university graduation gift either...for the same reason. No present for qualifying as a CA either. Just my family to help celebrate. Was enough for me....and I treated my sons the same way. *Last I looked my employers didn't give me a present for going to work last week and doing my job*

 

[Cathleen]

To answer your original question...hell no!

Breast reduction may have it's medical reasons...breast augmentation rarely does. Frankly I'd think I did a pretty shitty job as a parent if my 18 year old daughter even wanted breast implants. Like to think I brought her up so she was happy within her own skin and her self confidence and self esteem didn't come from her cup size.

As for high school graduation gifts...I got taken out to dinner. Period. Doing well at school was considered my job...it was expected of me. No present for doing it. No university graduation gift either...for the same reason. No present for qualifying as a CA either. Just my family to help celebrate. Was enough for me....and I treated my sons the same way. *Last I looked my employers didn't give me a present for going to work last week and doing my job*

Hi WW, I didn't get a gift last week either and I work for myself. lol

I agree about the gifts. High school my parents threw a party and I received gifts of money from their friends. College - that luggage!

My sweet and adorable niece just 'graduated' from 8th grade yesterday. I laughed - I told her I loved her, was proud of her accomplishment this school year and good luck next year. It is her job. My nephew (who is 9 now) at the age of 6, told my sister he didn't like this school thing anymore. He liked it for a while but did he have to go everyday? She simply said, I have my job and you have yours. Now get cleaned up, dressed and come down for breakfast.

 

[wicked woman]

Hi WW, I didn't get a gift last week either and I work for myself. lol

I agree about the gifts. High school my parents threw a party and I received gifts of money from their friends. College - that luggage!

My sweet and adorable niece just 'graduated' from 8th grade yesterday. I laughed - I told her I loved her, was proud of her accomplishment this school year and good luck next year. It is her job. My nephew (who is 9 now) at the age of 6, told my sister he didn't like this school thing anymore. He liked it for a while but did he have to go everyday? She simply said, I have my job and you have yours. Now get cleaned up, dressed and come down for breakfast.

Hey Cate As for last week...I hereby declare that Cate has fully earned a gift by her consciencious, dedicated perservering contributions to the work world. Now go get yourself a gift! hehe Shoes, fancy coffee, movie, a book, something your little heart desires. *I've got no problem rewarding myself...it's just the others!*

I like your sister's approach.

 

[LadyJeanne]

Here is another thing that I've been considering. The 'Runaway Bride'. I have no problem with her cold feet but I do think she handled it terribily, that is an understatement actually.

The lies about being kidnapped, allowing her parents and loved ones to go through hell thinking horrible things. All of that - really bad decision. OK, I sure have made some dosies too (not to THAT extent but....).

So why is she getting $500K to tell her story? Talk about rewarding stupid behavior. I wouldn't watch a movie or read a book about her actions. I didn't and won't read Amber Frey's book about her relationship with Scott Peterson. I know publishers and movie producers hope I'll read/watch and their job is to put out books and movies but I'm not interested.

But the bigger question to me is HER behavior now - now that she is home. I just can't imagine tring to make a buck off that situation. Are the people that love her shocked? Are they encouraging it? What kind of advice is she receiving...... do people around her care?

I saw Katie Couric's interveiw with her and her fiancee. She's getting some kind of therapy. She couldn't explain why she did it - or wouldn't, because of the book or movie deal. She described a childhood with parents who were well-off and gave her every advantage. It sounded like they took care of every little problem that ever came up in her life, meaning she probably didn't learn how to cope with anything, big or little. She also said she didn't have cold feet - that's not why she ran away. She also couldn't explain why she had done all that shoplifting before - she even lifted a wedding book.

Her fiancee was very supportive. They still plan on getting married, but don't know when. Maybe after she leaves the facility where she's getting therapy.

This is a major stretch but Michael Jackson.... nuts, yes. The thing I don't understand is all the people around him profess their love for him etc. Why didn't they do something to intervene 20 years ago and say to him 'Micheal, you're getting weird.' If my brother, loved one, began to act in bizzar ways I'd say something, help somehow.

How can people be quiet when they see their loved one do outrageous things? I just can't imagine doing nothing to help.

His family is just as wierd as he is.

Someone should have told him a long, long, long time ago that it is not ok for a grown man to sleep with boys in his bed. Even if he did not actually molest those children, I have no sympathy for Jackson. If anyone could afford to get treatment and help for psychological issues, it's him.

 

[boston_bbw]

I would never assist my 18 yr old in cosmetic surgery for cosmetic reasons. I am curious how people would feel as a parent if your 18 yr old who was obese wanted gastric bypass? Is that still cosmetic or would you consider it with the known health risks if she dosn't do something on her own?

 

[MrBates]

Just what every 18yr old male needs for a graduation present:

A bigger penis.

heh. Like the other day I heard about the online bridal registry where you can donate money.
I'm sure someone is gonna come up with the online high school graduation registry next.

"Please donate to the fund to help me afford an operation to get an extra 3IN"

 

[LadyJeanne]

I would never assist my 18 yr old in cosmetic surgery for cosmetic reasons. I am curious how people would feel as a parent if your 18 yr old who was obese wanted gastric bypass? Is that still cosmetic or would you consider it with the known health risks if she dosn't do something on her own?

I don't see gastric bypass as cosmetic. That's done for health reasons for people who are morbidly obese - meaning it could kill them. Still, at 18, I think it's too young for such drastic measures. At that age, there is a lot that can be done for obesity through proper nutrition and exercise, and there are even some prescription drugs now available. I'd go that route first before surgery.

 

[Ricwilly]

I'm against cosmetic surgery except for heath reasons like breast reduction for a bad back, but then it's not cosmetic huh? LOL Or to correct a deformity, like ya a really really bad nose would qualify in my book, I'm totally against breast implants or any implants for cosmetic reasons, really puts me off.
The runaway bride didn't do anything wrong by running and hidding, as adults we are free to do this, she shouldn't have made up the kidnap story after but she's gettin enough grief for that. Ya, I don't buy those books or stories about those sort of things but apparently some do so if she can make a buck offa it, hell I say go for it.
I don't have an opinion about Jackson, enough people already do.

 

[Eilan]

Elian, I recently saw a 'Murphy Brown' episode - that was a fun and well writen show.

I love it, but then my inner bitch is drawn to strong female characters.

So why is she getting $500K to tell her story?

Good question, particularly when she didn't repay the entire amount of what it cost to search for her. And didn't I read somewhere that her mother is still handling all of her finances?

Stories like this bother me. What will end up happening is that because of someone who cries "wolf," a REAL abduction victim might not be taken seriously. And THAT'S a tragedy.

 

[Ricwilly]

The runaway bride didn't ask anyone to search for her. She only said she was kidnapped after they assumed she was and started looking for her. She stopped them from searching more by calling and saying she had been let go. Granted it was a bad choice on her part by going along with the kidnap story. I don't see how she could be considered responsible for the expense of the search.

 

[Eilan]

I'm bothered by the fact that a missing (adult) person will make the news only if SHE'S young, cute, and white.

The runaway bride didn't ask anyone to search for her. She only said she was kidnapped after they assumed she was and started looking for her. She stopped them from searching more by calling and saying she had been let go.

If one of your loved ones were missing--and you didn't yet know why--wouldn't you search for him/her regardless? She disappeared, so most people would assume that she'd been abducted. Though, interestingly enough, she's statistically more likely to be harmed by her fiancé than by a stranger.

Granted it was a bad choice on her part by going along with the kidnap story. I don't see how she could be considered responsible for the expense of the search.

I considered her lying to the authorities about the kidnapping as a lame-assed attempt to save face. Lying to the cops IS a crime, and nobody forced her to do so. She committed a crime (didn't she plead "no contest"?) AND she wasted time and money that would have been better spent in other ways, so she should pay restitution to the town.

Lots of law-enforcement agencies, particularly at the local level, are strapped for cash as it is. They don't need bogus/phony cases draining their resources even further.

My state had a problem with a highway shooter a year or so ago. While the search for the gunman was taking place, some dude was target shooting in his back yard and accidentally shot his dad's truck. Because he didn't want his dad to be angry with him, he called the cops and said the truck had been shot while he was driving on the highway. He ended up facing felony charges and having to pay about $5K in law-enforcement overtime/investigation costs.