Is this normal?

[infinity706]

I'm actually not playing devil's advocate this time. That's actually my solution for dealing with some people. The great thing with personal relationships is that you can adjust things based on what works for each person. I'm not justifying nonconsentual hitting or saying that any solution will work for anyone. Just about anything can work in moderation. It doesn't matter whether it's eating McDonald's cheeseburgers, smoking pot, or hitting someone when you get mad. I didn't say it should be open season to beat the hell out of him when she gets mad. If it would make her feel better to punch him in the arm or something when she gets mad, though, it might be worth working out with her.

It's really no different than what you said about tasks that are impossible to complete perfectly and how it would crush your self esteem. I actually enjoy having to do impossible tasks. It doesn't put any pressure on me at all because I can concede from the beginning that I'm going to fail. It's also the best way to get me to be productive at work. If I don't have a massively overloaded workload, I'll get bored and I won't get anything taken care of nearly as fast.

 

[fgarvb1]

Is she a green eyed Redhead of mostly Irish decent with a attitude?

I had one of those.

If she is ...RUN FORREST RUN!

 

[cowslinger64]

I'm not justifying nonconsentual hitting or saying that any solution will work for anyone. Just about anything can work in moderation. It doesn't matter whether it's eating McDonald's cheeseburgers, smoking pot, or hitting someone when you get mad.
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So, busting your partner up side the head, when you're mad is ok, in moderation.

That's asinine.


You can fit a square peg in a round hole, if you cut off the corners. Talk about trying to make something work, that shouldn't...geez

 

[infinity706]

I'm not justifying nonconsentual hitting or saying that any solution will work for anyone. Just about anything can work in moderation. It doesn't matter whether it's eating McDonald's cheeseburgers, smoking pot, or hitting someone when you get mad.
----------------------------------------------------------

So, busting your partner up side the head, when you're mad is ok, in moderation.

That's asinine.


You can fit a square peg in a round hole, if you cut off the corners. Talk about trying to make something work, that shouldn't...geez

I didn't say you had to hit them in the head. Did you even read half of what I said in this thread?

 

[cowslinger64]

So, busting your partner ANYWHERE ON THEM when you're mad is ok, in moderation.





Better?


Sorry, but hitting someone in anger is a problem. Add to that the point that she didn't even apologize is an ever bigger problem.

Yeah, I read half of what you said...and your argument makes no sense to me.

That's all I had to say...

 

[infinity706]

That's fine. It's not like we have to agree on everything (or anything).

 

[swtrthnhoney]

Having been a red-headed, hot-tempered gal...(note I said having been)...
I don't condone her actions but maybe I can shed a little light on the why.
Being the youngest of several kids, I was always told how to do something by everyone else. It would frustrate the heck out of me. When I got older, it still did. Combine that with parents who pushed you to excel at everything and the fact the being an overachiever is engrained in one's persona, only intensifies the "never be wrong" attitude. It is looked upon as a weakness.
So, though it's not right for her to hit you (or vice versa), your going over to help her might have pushed her hot button to lash out. Not your fault, it is really her weakness. Not being able to fix the three-way isn't a weakness, sounds like it's just a pain in the a**. None of these things condone her actions. For her, it might have been a challenge, a test, or a way to prove she can do it. The hot-headed anger wasn't really about you (which doesn't make it easier to tolerate).
Just a thought. Not a good reason for lashing out.
She probably didn't apologize right away because she was most likely embarassed that she acted that way at all. It does happen (believe me, I know).
So if you and she discussed it and if you are cool with giving her more chances. Then give her the benefit of the doubt (this time). If it happens again, RUN!