Is there a Hallmark for this?

[ydahecnot]

For at least the past couple of decades, there has been a shadow world of lovers and/or confidants that those closest to us in the real world have no idea about. Heck, sometimes we never even see and/or hear said lovers/confidants. This is a huge demimonde that the greeting card industry is at the very least underserving. So let’s give them a nudge with some suggestions...for ecards for the most part, I would think.

—“I get my Kiks out of you.”
—“You’ll never know what you mean to me...and I hope he never will, either.”
—“The Skype’s the limit with us.”

Continue

 

[neakman]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I Jack off

Would you suck me too?



(printed on recycled paper)

 

[ydahecnot]

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I Jack off

Would you suck me too?



(Tributed on recycled paper)

Fixing your typo.

“You already know what this card says, stalker!”

 

[beachbaby179]

There's a flaw in this whole thing. It would have to be an e-card, since most times we don't have an address either. Or a real name... or ...

 

[ydahecnot]

For at least the past couple of decades, there has been a shadow world of lovers and/or confidants that those closest to us in the real world have no idea about. Heck, sometimes we never even see and/or hear said lovers/confidants. This is a huge demimonde that the greeting card industry is at the very least underserving. So let’s give them a nudge with some suggestions...for ecards for the most part, I would think.

—“I get my Kiks out of you.”
—“You’ll never know what you mean to me...and I hope he never will, either.”
—“The Skype’s the limit with us.”

Continue

Anyhoo, a hacker passed along one sent by AF and Hornblende:

“I am sooo batting out of my league, but thanks for loving me.”

(Full disclosure: I am too)

 

[FAITHandFLESH]

(Outside)

HEY THERE

(Inside)

Thank you so much for that sexy pic of you in lingerie! Are you a model? I found the same picture on 400 other websites!

I'm so lucky, having a supermodel as a chat buddy!

 

[AbsintheFather]

I cherish you, and I cherish our friendship

But I'm also cherishing 3 of your friends

 

[Taegul]

Now I'm picturing a Hallmark store with like 6 rows and 6 columns of cards with nothing but dick pics on the front cover...

 

[AbsintheFather]

You’ve been on my mind a lot lately

Now my dick is chaffed

 

[AbsintheFather]

On Mother’s Day, I hope you feel honored for all your years of caring for your children. And every day, I hope you feel how loved you are for sharing your nastiest thoughts with me on the internet.

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

Thank you for neglecting/ abusing your husband/ wife giving me the opportunity to seduce him/ her.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Now I'm picturing a Hallmark store with like 6 rows and 6 columns of cards with nothing but dick pics on the front cover...

And they're all Pmann's dick.



Inside:


Roses are red,

Violets are synonymous

With naughty bit pics

Of someone anonymous

 

[ydahecnot]

Awesome, Mr. Caps58!

 

[fungatorgurl101]

With Father's day arriving.... I believe some of the girls will agree...

Thank you for being a shitty dad... I knew I should have swallowed

 

[beachbaby179]

With Father's day arriving.... I believe some of the girls will agree...

Thank you for being a shitty dad... I knew I should have swallowed

Ooh... *scribbles furiously * this is good stuff...

 

[Miles Long]

[Cover] We've been chatting a few minutes so I wanted to send you this note to let you know how I feel. These three little words every woman longs to hear so she knows it's real...

[Interior] Please send nudes.

[Back] I swear I didn't also send this card to all your friends. Don't even bother asking them kthnxbai

 

[lurkingguy1978]

Roses are red,
Violets are Blue,
Your friend is super hot
But she told me to go screw.

Send me your skype ID?

 

[lacandy]

Outside- I’m sorry

Inside - that our undying love after cybering for two weeks has fizzled like a firework on the Fourth of July...but the newer new girl said she loved me more.

 

[SlyderInside]

Outside- I’m sorry

Inside - that our undying love after cybering for two weeks has fizzled like a firework on the Fourth of July...but the newer new girl said she loved me more.

Winner, right there.

Front: "Happy Arbor Day"
Inside: "Sorry about all the wood you're getting in your inbox."

 

[lacandy]

Outside: Good-bye, Good Luck...

Inside: You were an amazing fuck
But these days mostly, you seem a little ghostly
It’s that time I fear, where you disappear
I’ll always think it was my fault, even when I learn of your new ALT
There won’t ever be a final bow, I can see you ghosting now
So good-bye, good luck, but in my head you were hit by a truck!

 

[neakman]

Outside: Good-bye, Good Luck...

Inside: You were an amazing fuck
But these days mostly, you seem a little ghostly
It’s that time I fear, where you disappear
I’ll always think it was my fault, even when I learn of your new ALT
There won’t ever be a final bow, I can see you ghosting now
So good-bye, good luck, but in my head you were hit by a truck!

Nice, I think you need to make multiple copies.

 

[FAITHandFLESH]

LOYALTY...

Even though I am not being so to my spouse,
If you EVER cheat on me online I will cause you
trouble in ways that have not even been documented yet...

Always Yours!

 

[ydahecnot]

Front: Thank you for being in a sheer nightie when I asked what you were wearing.

Inside: Yeah, I know it was more like thick flannel down to your toes, but my spank bank says differently. Thank you!

 

[BlackCashmere]

Omg...best thread ever...too funny...

The problem with e cards is that most don’t pick them up

 

[ydahecnot]

And they're all Pmann's dick.

I wouldn’t touch those cards