Is it cheating?

[Easyvirtue]

I come here because my wife and I see sex differently. She is incredibly HOT and our sex is wonderful, but our interests are MUCH different. I love everything naughty and forbidden and weird and so on and so forth, but she is a vanilla sex woman. SO……. I come here to experience what I like even if it is by "written word." Am I cheating, is this wrong?
Thanks,
Horny and confused!
XOXO

 

[MelissaBaby]

If you feel like you are cheating, you are cheating.

 

[AlotLikePsyche]

Does she know you’re here and is she okay with it?

My opinion:

If she both knows and is okay with it, no you are not.

If she either does not know or knows and is not okay with it, yes you are.

 

[adrina]

If you're just reading porn stories or reading the threads on the board I wouldn't call it cheating.

If you're engaging in role play behind your wife's back, I'd call it cheating.

 

[BobaFetaCheese]

Dump the bitch, get a woman who has the same tastes. Otherwise you're gonna be miserable your whole life.

 

[patient1]

If you're just reading porn stories or reading the threads on the board I wouldn't call it cheating.

If you're engaging in role play behind your wife's back, I'd call it cheating.

This. Whether it's openly on the boards, or in PMs.

 

[AngusBridie]

Eh... its like this thread was made for me...

 

[islandman]

Don't listen to any of the Puritans above me.

It's only cheating if you're doing it on a Friday, and even them, only if you forget to cross your fingers.

 

[Bookishleigh]

Turn around, leave this place and never look back. While you can.

This.

If you feel like you are cheating, you are cheating.

And this.

And without knowing anything about you two, I would suggest talking to her about your interests. You don't have to jump right into the hard stuff. See if she likes being blindfolded or light restraints. Save the wax play and caning for, I don't know, a couple years.

 

[Noor]

If you have to ask... It's cheating.

If you can't talk to your wife about it... It's cheating.

 

[Captainnumnuts]

I come here because my wife and I see sex differently. She is incredibly HOT and our sex is wonderful, but our interests are MUCH different. I love everything naughty and forbidden and weird and so on and so forth, but she is a vanilla sex woman. SO……. I come here to experience what I like even if it is by "written word." Am I cheating, is this wrong?
Thanks,
Horny and confused!
XOXO

Clearly you didn't marry her for her brains. Try enjoying her for the person she is and see how that works.

 

[lovetoread]

if you can lean over and say to your partner, hey look at what this dude/dudette just wrote me, then its not cheating

if you are hiding what you are doing then yes it is

i am not buying that you are only reading dirty stories online

 

[MascaraRuns]

I come here because my wife and I see sex differently. She is incredibly HOT and our sex is wonderful, but our interests are MUCH different. I love everything naughty and forbidden and weird and so on and so forth, but she is a vanilla sex woman. SO……. I come here to experience what I like even if it is by "written word." Am I cheating, is this wrong?
Thanks,
Horny and confused!
XOXO

My opinion: reading and writing here is not cheating. It's like a fantasy land. If you are PM sexy ideas and talking about your cock or her pussy in those PM, then it's a form of cheating.

 

[heathergives]

If you feel like you are cheating, you are cheating.

^ ^ ^ This. ^ ^ ^

 

[Shelly2inme]

Ethics

I agree with the overall tone of the comments - if she knows it is not cheating.

But to me you have a bigger issue to look at. If she is your wife and you love her the real question on your mind should not be: "Is it cheating." The real question is why are you not on the same page with your wife. If two people are really in love and "soulmates" then they should be on the same page about important things.

Society in general has some pretty deep sexual issues and mental illnesses. Why not learn to communicate with your wife and explore issues together. If you enjoy certain sexual experiences explain why and ask why she is not comfortable with it.

Get to the root of things not just the symptoms.

My husband knows that I masturbate with both men and women her on Literotica and that I am sexual involved with a woman and several guys in our real life. I have his full approval and we have no secrets. I love our life but it did not just magically happen. We talk openly about everything and always have. That's what a real marriage should be like.

 

[TheOlderGuy]

I agree with the overall tone of the comments - if she knows it is not cheating.

But to me you have a bigger issue to look at. If she is your wife and you love her the real question on your mind should not be: "Is it cheating." The real question is why are you not on the same page with your wife. If two people are really in love and "soulmates" then they should be on the same page about important things.

Society in general has some pretty deep sexual issues and mental illnesses. Why not learn to communicate with your wife and explore issues together. If you enjoy certain sexual experiences explain why and ask why she is not comfortable with it.

Get to the root of things not just the symptoms.

My husband knows that I masturbate with both men and women her on Literotica and that I am sexual involved with a woman and several guys in our real life. I have his full approval and we have no secrets. I love our life but it did not just magically happen. We talk openly about everything and always have. That's what a real marriage should be like.

^^^ Words to embrace.

 

[Noor]

I come here because my wife and I see sex differently. She is incredibly HOT and our sex is wonderful, but our interests are MUCH different. I love everything naughty and forbidden and weird and so on and so forth, but she is a vanilla sex woman. SO……. I come here to experience what I like even if it is by "written word." Am I cheating, is this wrong?
Thanks,
Horny and confused!
XOXO

If your wife was doing it, would you consider it cheating?

 

[justdamhorny]

My opinion: reading and writing here is not cheating. It's like a fantasy land. If you are PM sexy ideas and talking about your cock or her pussy in those PM, then it's a form of cheating.

Fantasy land is all I have so my wife knows that I read stories and watch videos. I stopped hiding it from her a few years ago. On the odd occasion I'll even jerk off in front of her but if I do, she will just leave the room.

 

[FAITHandFLESH]

I'm NOT preaching, but Christ said if you lust after a woman in your heart, you have committed adultery in his heart.

He also said, "You have heard that it was said to an older generation, ‘Do not murder,’ and ‘whoever murders will be subjected to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that anyone who is angry with a brother will be subjected to judgment."

It's the INTENT of the heart...

 

[MascaraRuns]

Fantasy land is all I have so my wife knows that I read stories and watch videos. I stopped hiding it from her a few years ago. On the odd occasion I'll even jerk off in front of her but if I do, she will just leave the room.

There is so much more to life. Cannot understand some spouses. Wanting Sex is a big part of all of our lives, at least we would like it to be. That's partly why we are all here. No man should have to jerk off in front of his wife without her offering to help...unless they are playing.

 

[Noor]

I'm NOT preaching, but Christ said if you lust after a woman in your heart, you have committed adultery in his heart.

He also said, "You have heard that it was said to an older generation, ‘Do not murder,’ and ‘whoever murders will be subjected to judgment.’ 22 But I say to you that anyone who is angry with a brother will be subjected to judgment."

It's the INTENT of the heart...

I wish more religious Christian males would practice what they preach.

 

[Man4Strapon]

I come here because my wife and I see sex differently. She is incredibly HOT and our sex is wonderful, but our interests are MUCH different. I love everything naughty and forbidden and weird and so on and so forth, but she is a vanilla sex woman. SO……. I come here to experience what I like even if it is by "written word." Am I cheating, is this wrong?
Thanks,
Horny and confused!
XOXO

No, it's not cheating. It's fantasy. To suggest otherwise is absurd.
Watching porn is not cheating either, even if you keep it from your spouse.

 

[Comshaw]

If you feel like you are cheating, you are cheating.

The above is the precise and undeniable truth. You're going to get answers that span the gamut from "as long as you're here you're cheating" to the opposite extreme. What it comes down to is how you see it. No one else gets to tell you what cheating is. They can sputter and pontificate and spew their opinions all they want, but it doesn't mean a damned thing. You and only you get to make that choice. It ain't someone else's place or responsibility to tell you what is acceptable in your life and what ain't. The only thing I'll say is weigh it carefully and choose wisely.


Comshaw

 

[Noor]

If you have to ask,then yes.

 

[oralaccents]

Unless your partner has legal ownership of your thoughts, no.