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Is Bigfoot Real?

Is Bigfoot Real

  • Yes

    Votes: 16 38.1%

  • No

    Votes: 13 31.0%

  • Maybe

    Votes: 13 31.0%
  • Total voters
    42
CandiCame

CandiCame

Rocket Grunt
Joined
Apr 12, 2011
Posts
26,765
Discuss. This came up today in meatspace so I'm starting a thread. I think out of all the cryptids, the Yeti/Bigfoot/etc is probably the most feasible.
 
This came up today because my aunty swears up and down that she saw bigfoot.

Here's my issue with bigfoot. I get that great apes are hard to find. But in North America I don't think we can have a great ape. Because biology and diet.

Apes are herbivores, like humans are the only truly omnivorous apes, and we had to jump through some hoops to get there. Like I like double bacon cheeseburgers as much as the next person, but I have the sense to know I can't eat them raw or I'll shit myself to death, because I'm an ape. I don't have the digestive system I need to not get parasites and salmonella and all that other shit.

During the winter there's just not enough food in this region to support a population of great apes. Generally big-ass herbivores move during the winter, but people have reported bigfoot sighting in the winter. The predators even sometimes get so desperate for food that they'll come into your yard and try to get at livestock, because the big game leaves and the small game tends to hibernate, or at least hole up.

That's the main problem I have with Bigfoot. What the hell are they eating?

So I'm stuck with two options:

1: Bigfoot's not a thing or
2: Bigfoot knows how to cook

And I don't know why, but I think that if Bigfoot is having BBQs in the snow that's like... really disturbing to me?

Also like, I'm not Jane Goodall and I know very little about apes but like... ought they be that big? Like aren't humans the biggest apes? In terms of height? Like even gorillas are short, right? Like they're beefy but they're short? That's not a strike against bigfeet, it's just weird.

Edit: So I just looked it up and according to the WWF, lowland gorillas during food shortages WILL eat ants and insect larva, but they do get sick if they eat too many and do have to have like a 99.99% vegan diet. So even still, like I don't think there would be enough ants to carry a population of bigfeet through the winter in North America, especially around here.

Also, a gorilla's dick is only 4in. No shade, just surprised me.

Ok, a little bit of shade. If I was trying to fuck a 300lb bodybuilder and he whipped out a 4in cock I would be mildly disappointed.

Edit: Also, I am only posting that on the internet because I know almost for a fact that no gorilla is gonna be reading this to see me make fun of his dick. I would not do that to his face. Because they can rip humans in half. So nobody tell them I said that. I'm gonna be really uncomfortable if I even find out any of y'all know sign language because I don't want them fuckers comin after me. Tell him I said his dick was huge.
 
Last edited:
Not just tha, but morally, I don't think you want to be a gorilla SOH specialist unless we are talking gorillas into that particular kink.

I gather you are a size queen, so I am curious about you general metrics on sussing that out amongst higher primates, specifically humans. You have the advantage of experiencing the biomechanics yourself, and being around dudes in ways women are not.

I have no idea in, say a locker room situations on who shows and who grows, and obviously porn is self-selecting. My general sense is that higher T men are more endowed. Like moobs and a soft jawline are smaller. Ditto full head of hair vs male pattern baldness.

Any correlation?
 
About as real as aliens from outer space or the Loch Ness Monster😂
 
Que said:
Not just tha, but morally, I don't think you want to be a gorilla SOH specialist unless we are talking gorillas into that particular kink.

I gather you are a size queen, so I am curious about you general metrics on sussing that out amongst higher primates, specifically humans. You have the advantage of experiencing the biomechanics yourself, and being around dudes in ways women are not.

I have no idea in, say a locker room situations on who shows and who grows, and obviously porn is self-selecting. My general sense is that higher T men are more endowed. Like moobs and a soft jawline are smaller. Ditto full head of hair vs male pattern baldness.

Any correlation?
Click to expand...

I don't want this in my bigfoot thread, but I started it with my dick joke so I guess it's on me.

I'm not a size queen, I just thought it was funny that their dicks were not in the proportions I thought they'd be. But honestly like... apparently they have gay orgies with anal sex and I don't think gorillas know lube is a thing so I don't... know about all that. I've torn before and I don't recommend it and idk how the hell they're avoiding it. I got an infection and I bet they don't know about antibiotics either so that can't be great.

I don't know who's a grower and who's a shower either. I didn't get some kind of magical power of mutant ability bestowed upon me the first time I tasted the rainbow. You just roll the dice and you get what you get.

Like I am legit not a size queen. I know I've said this before but I'm very small. Not like my dick, I mean, ok yeah also my dick- but I've not had any complaints- but I mean like my body is small. My boyfriend is actually... I had to work up to it. I used to want to get shitfaced drunk every time I had sex because that thing is terrifying. That's why I ripped. It's real easy to get excited and bite off more than you chew, and then he gets all weird about it because he thinks he's killed you.

But I do think most people tend to be in proportion, so overall bigger guys, like taller, broader guys, do tend to have bigger dicks.

Plus if we're gonna talk about my dick preferences another reason I don't like the absolute monster cock isn't just that, you know, it's gotta fit inside me, it's also that guys with huge dicks usually can't get them hard enough for me? And like that's not on me. Like they'll have a full erection and it's still squishy. I don't like that. A lot of people do, it's just a personal preference thing. I like um rock hard. I'd actually rather have a smaller rock hard dick than the giant squishy one.

But I don't have any magical powers to detect hardness either.

Also it's a moot point because I've kinda quit fucking anybody with a dick except my boyfriend. Like we're still open I just... I don't know, I don't feel the need to whore around as much anymore. I don't know why. My sexual behavior has changed. I think that just happens sometimes.

This whole post has nothing to do with bigfoot except I guess you can reasonably assume they have buttsex. And it's probably nasty. Maybe that's why they famously smell so bad.

Also, you have to have high testosterone levels to go bald. That's a thing. So you're not super great at picking out who's got a lot of testosterone. I'm actually on medication because my body naturally produces too much testosterone- I've talked about that before, it's part of the reason I had such bad mood swings when I was younger. I was basically having roid rage. And like... I look like a chick.

There's like a million kinds of testosterone and the kind that I make too much of isn't the kind that makes you go bald/be hairy in your youth. It's the kind that fucks up your brain and makes you have mood swings and makes you metabolism real high so that you're constantly hungry and has a bunch of other shitty side effects.

Like testosterone does a lot more than make you look phenotypically "manly". Hormone levels are nothing to fuck around with.

DHT testosterone, specifically, is the one that makes you go bald. It also makes you chubby, and is linked to cardiovascular disease and prostate problems, and acne.

Free testosterone and SHBG make you have the mood swings, but they also make you wicked hot. Like that's a true fact. I've got like three birth defects that have the side effect of "make you wicked hot". But if you have too much free testosterone, that is, it's not linked to a protein, it's just sitting in the blood, people think you're hotter. I don't remember why, I just did have a doctor tell me that.

But I mean it makes you super fucking crazy and I'm still pretty hot regulating it. A lot of native guys have excess free/SHBG it's just not talked about a lot. Like that's part of the reason we tend not to go bald and also tend not to have as much body hair.

I didn't mean to go off on that it's just that you said that baldness indicates low testosterone and it's actually the opposite. You go bald because you have too much testosterone. Specifically too much DHT. And it's matralinially inherited, so I'll probably die with a thick head of hair.

https://www.forhims.com/blog/dht-and-male-hair-loss-explained
 
If they did exist would they need to type an entire page to get a simple thought across? I suppose they make special keyboards for neanderthal fingers. :)
 
hey...

CandiCame said:
I don't want this in my bigfoot thread, but I started it with my dick joke so I guess it's on me.

I'm not a size queen, I just thought it was funny that their dicks were not in the proportions I thought they'd be. But honestly like... apparently they have gay orgies with anal sex and I don't think gorillas know lube is a thing so I don't... know about all that. I've torn before and I don't recommend it and idk how the hell they're avoiding it. I got an infection and I bet they don't know about antibiotics either so that can't be great.

I don't know who's a grower and who's a shower either. I didn't get some kind of magical power of mutant ability bestowed upon me the first time I tasted the rainbow. You just roll the dice and you get what you get.

Like I am legit not a size queen. I know I've said this before but I'm very small. Not like my dick, I mean, ok yeah also my dick- but I've not had any complaints- but I mean like my body is small. My boyfriend is actually... I had to work up to it. I used to want to get shitfaced drunk every time I had sex because that thing is terrifying. That's why I ripped. It's real easy to get excited and bite off more than you chew, and then he gets all weird about it because he thinks he's killed you.

But I do think most people tend to be in proportion, so overall bigger guys, like taller, broader guys, do tend to have bigger dicks.

Plus if we're gonna talk about my dick preferences another reason I don't like the absolute monster cock isn't just that, you know, it's gotta fit inside me, it's also that guys with huge dicks usually can't get them hard enough for me? And like that's not on me. Like they'll have a full erection and it's still squishy. I don't like that. A lot of people do, it's just a personal preference thing. I like um rock hard. I'd actually rather have a smaller rock hard dick than the giant squishy one.

But I don't have any magical powers to detect hardness either.

Also it's a moot point because I've kinda quit fucking anybody with a dick except my boyfriend. Like we're still open I just... I don't know, I don't feel the need to whore around as much anymore. I don't know why. My sexual behavior has changed. I think that just happens sometimes.

This whole post has nothing to do with bigfoot except I guess you can reasonably assume they have buttsex. And it's probably nasty. Maybe that's why they famously smell so bad.

Also, you have to have high testosterone levels to go bald. That's a thing. So you're not super great at picking out who's got a lot of testosterone. I'm actually on medication because my body naturally produces too much testosterone- I've talked about that before, it's part of the reason I had such bad mood swings when I was younger. I was basically having roid rage. And like... I look like a chick.

There's like a million kinds of testosterone and the kind that I make too much of isn't the kind that makes you go bald/be hairy in your youth. It's the kind that fucks up your brain and makes you have mood swings and makes you metabolism real high so that you're constantly hungry and has a bunch of other shitty side effects.

Like testosterone does a lot more than make you look phenotypically "manly". Hormone levels are nothing to fuck around with.

DHT testosterone, specifically, is the one that makes you go bald. It also makes you chubby, and is linked to cardiovascular disease and prostate problems, and acne.

Free testosterone and SHBG make you have the mood swings, but they also make you wicked hot. Like that's a true fact. I've got like three birth defects that have the side effect of "make you wicked hot". But if you have too much free testosterone, that is, it's not linked to a protein, it's just sitting in the blood, people think you're hotter. I don't remember why, I just did have a doctor tell me that.

But I mean it makes you super fucking crazy and I'm still pretty hot regulating it. A lot of native guys have excess free/SHBG it's just not talked about a lot. Like that's part of the reason we tend not to go bald and also tend not to have as much body hair.

I didn't mean to go off on that it's just that you said that baldness indicates low testosterone and it's actually the opposite. You go bald because you have too much testosterone. Specifically too much DHT. And it's matralinially inherited, so I'll probably die with a thick head of hair.

https://www.forhims.com/blog/dht-and-male-hair-loss-explained
Click to expand...

what you're saying about people being proportionate in their dicks in relation to the overall size of their body.
NOT TRUE, NOT TRUE...,
I went to a trade school where I met this one kid, who was just outta high school, this kid had a friend with a 15 inch cock and he only stood five foot even at 18 years old. That little fuckers cock was bigger around than my forearm at the elbow. The kid I knew had a video on his phone of 3 girls trying to give this kid a blowjob. I was not only amazed I was enthralled!!!
 
​

grauer's gorilla
Size, Weight. and Lifespan
The earth’s largest primate is distinguished from other gorillas (namely: the mountain gorilla, a subspecies of the eastern gorilla; and the western lowland and Cross River gorillas, subspecies of the western gorilla) by a stocky body, large hands, and a short muzzle.

Males typically weigh between 450 and 550 pounds (204 to 250 kg); however, giant-size male Grauer’s gorillas can weigh 600 pounds (272 kg) or more. Their maximum height is a towering 6 feet, 4 inches (1.95 meters).

Females weigh half as much as their male counterparts and stand only 5 feet, 3 inches tall (1.62 meters), or less.

The lifespan for Grauer’s gorilla is 35 to 50 years in the wild.
Click to expand...

whether or not there are still existing, rarely-spotted, almost extinct apes in north america is open to questio. i suppose it's possible, even if it is unlikely. i would think the tales come down from long long ago when the last ice-age saw the extinction of gigantopithecus blacki, which tipped the scales around 500lbs and 10 feet tall. snow, ice, men, tigers, black bears? no reason not to think the stories today are a memory handed down from back then. could some adapt over time and survive? possibly, not probably.

and chimps often eat meat; monkeys feature regularly on their menu.
 
butters said:
ANY of those kinds of programme are

i'd lay odds it's a memory passed down over millennia
Click to expand...

Almost certainly. Humans and the really large great apes in North America crossed paths for a short time. No doubt that's all it is. I've always thought so anyway.
I could buy into some apes surviving without us knowing about it cuz earth is a big motherfucker and if we don't look specifically for something we may not find it but groups of people have been actively looking for them for decades. They can't hide that well.
 
I live in the Pacific Northwest, the epicenter of Sasquatch sightings. I've been exploring the backwoods 'round these parts for over 13 lustrums and I have NEVER found sign of or seen one of those elusive beings. Additionally many of my friends are hunters, fishermen, hikers and back packers who also have trudged and explored the backwoods and they too have never found sign of the elusive and fabled creature.

After thousands of years of humans on this continent, none have ever come up with a body or any substantial evidence of it's existence? There are legends, yes and anecdotal stories (with nothing of substance to back them up) but nothing more.

Most of the supposed "evidence" of Sasquatch is suspect at best and down right amateurishly produced at worst.

No sorry, I don't believe in such a being.

Comshaw
 
of course they're real, i used to live with one of their relatives. DEFINITELY not a 4 inch penis, either.

on the matter of diet, i tend to believe that everything evolves to take advantage of what's available. and if they are more closely related to man than apes, that would be even more so. the whole cryptozoology field is something that needs much closer examination. why wouldn't it be possible for a small race of semi-humans to avoid contact? there are still tribes in the amazon who haven't had contact. and WHY would they want contact with other humans? you see how well that worked out for the american indian.

besides, when i was a child and lived in the woods, i just know they were looking in the windows at me when i was home alone at night.
 
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