Introducing SO to Lit

[vfrman]

Hi folks - I've been on Lit for quite some time, and enjoy many aspects of it, particularly the fact that it is not totally populated by prono freaks, and spammers!!

I would really like to intorduce my wife to the wonderful world of lit, but dont really know how to broach the subject with her, she's not into initernet porn / sex sites as far as i know, and I dont want her to think I'm just perving around on the net looking for a cheap thrill!

I hope this makes sense, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[silverwhisper]

i talked about it w/ the mrs and mentioned that i posted a few stories here. that was enough for her to know about it. for all i know she actually has an ID here, etc.

if she wants to, she will. remember, you can lead a horse to water, right?

ed

 

[vfrman]

thanks Silver for the quick response, I think I probably just need to pluck up the courage to show her the site.

 

[silverwhisper]

have you already tried leaving the PC open to lit, perhaps to a thread she might find interesting?

ed

 

[vfrman]

yeah - i had thought of that, or just letting her catch me reading the stories.

Love your Av by the way

 

[M's girl]

What I like most about Lit is that you can talk sex and porn and everything here but mainly also about relationships. If you have questions you will almost always get a valid answer and many opinions that are helpful! I found Lit (honestly) looking for information on relationships, and not while looking for porn (although I 'm the first to admit I like porn too.

If you have 'problems' between you; Lit can help you solve them. If you don't have problems between you, Lit can help you get better educated about everything from sex to relationship matters. Plus, and that is what's so nice about here too.... it's a real community where people actualy care for each other!

You tell her thát plus that you care about your relationship and maybe even improving it (and your sexlife) and then how could she not love Lit too? Of course you need to explain why you are introducing her just now, and not before

 

[silverwhisper]

there's a number of bright folks here: i'm sure someone else will come up w/ something.

thanks, a buddy created it for me. :>

ed

 

[vfrman]

What I like most about Lit is that you can talk sex and porn and everything here but mainly also about relationships. If you have questions you will almost always get a valid answer and many opinions that are helpful! I found Lit (honestly) looking for information on relationships, and not while looking for porn (although I 'm the first to admit I like porn too.

If you have 'problems' between you; Lit can help you solve them. If you don't have problems between you, Lit can help you get better educated about everything from sex to relationship matters. Plus, and that is what's so nice about here too.... it's a real community where people actualy care for each other!

You tell her thát plus that you care about your relationship and maybe even improving it (and your sexlife) and then how could she not love Lit too? Of course you need to explain why you are introducing her just now, and not before

THanks M girl, that could be a good way to go, as we are just starting to reinvent our sex life afte having to share our bedroom with a junior member of the family for the last 3 years!!

 

[Guest]

 

[M's girl]

THanks M girl, that could be a good way to go, as we are just starting to reinvent our sex life afte having to share our bedroom with a junior member of the family for the last 3 years!!

Cool. Just tell her "Hey, I've found this wonderful site that is somewhat naughty but also very informative.... We've been sort of missing out a bit the last three years but now, since the bedroom is all ours again, I wish for us to bring back the love and excitement into our bedroom, and there are some wonderful suggestions and topics on Lit we could browse together" ....

... something like that. Would work for me. If you put the emphasis on together...

 

[M's girl]

how about printing a story you think she might like and reading it to her? if she's interested, she'll ask where you got it.

Yeah, that too... but if she becomes a member too, don't forget he has already 132 posts to his name and already registered in 2002. Now, that is about 4 years of Lit without her (unless he just met up with her after that).

I think there is a way in between "telling her a story by showing her a story" and telling the plain truth...

 

[vfrman]

I had thought about the username history thing - but maybe I would just have to reinvent myself as a new ID - a but underhand, but it may be easier that explianing away my previous lit history!


And how come you guys can make this all sound so stright forward!! lol

 

[Guest]

 

[M's girl]

And how come you guys can make this all sound so stright forward!! lol

I'm not sure if this is what you mean but for me it's easy: my partner knows about me and Lit from day one. It may be easier for girls to confess to men than the other way around maybe, but if you feel the same about sex and relationships Lit should not be a danger to your relationship in any way I think.

Do what you think is best and create a new you for Lit if you think you must... although honesty goes a long(er) way... I have not checked what you have said here before so that may also influence your decision. If you did nothing here to jeopardise your relationship, I would tell her about the previous years too... and keep your current handle...

But that's just me!

 

[M's girl]

my suggestion of reading her a story did not include misleading her to believe you just found this site, but after noticing most of your posts are in AM pics and Personals, you'd probably have a lot of explaining to do, and I'm not so sure the 'relationships and sex tips' angle would be very convincing either.

I know you did not mean to tell him to lie... you know that don't you? You were just quicker in checking his past here at Lit than I was.

I still believe in honesty anyway.

 

[Guest]

 

[M's girl]

Yes.

I guess in that scenario of reading the story, if she asked where he got the story, he'd just say something like "let me show you" and bring up the website like it was no big deal. But the history could make it a big deal.

True.. and to be honest, it would be with me. But it would be the hiding that part, rather than him looking at pics or reading erotic stories. If he would have told me from the start it would be OK. If he would hide it I would start to think something's up (even if it was not a big deal). It's the "why hide something you do not need to keep a secret" policy or so...

 

[TBKahuna123]

Well as for the "hiding it", if she knows he looks at porn anyway, who gives a shit? He said she's not relaly into internet porn, which makes me think that she knows he looks at porn and doesn't care. Unless I missed something somewhere.

I woudl take Scaly's "read a story" approach for a couple reasons. First its an introduction to the site. Second, if you are trying to reinvent your sex life, erotic storytime is a blast! That's how I broke the news to my wife that I was writing on Lit, and now it's something we do all the time. Print off a few stories and take them to bed one night and tell her a story. If she likes, you can then show her where you got them. Then you can show her the message board and show her what you like about it and how it might be used as a resource for other explorations. Just be sure to do this over a couple sessions, don't just try to jam all of this on her at once. Take it slow.

Another idea, if you are looking to reinvent your sex life, is to simply show it to her as a resource for that. Show her all the great info in the Blank Manual, and ask her if there is anything there that she might be interested in trying. Normally I wouldn't try this direct approach, because it may make her feel like he's not pleasing you, but if you are already in that mode of exploration and experimentation, this is perfect.

What ever you do, just make sure you show her how multifacetted the site is. Don't show her the Am Pics thread first, because that will be her intiial impression and she'll just think it's a porn board like everywhere else, even though there's a lot of depth even in that section.

Good luck and have fun with it!