I'm on fire today!

[scheherazade_79]

I was sitting on a futon with my laptop, trying to write a serious erotic poem. There was a dog either side of me, which didn't leave me with all that much space to store my lighter... so I put it between my legs.

It wasn't between my ankles, neither was it between my knees. We're talking upper thigh region here - just a centimetre or two away from Zade Heaven.

And after a while, I got so into my poem that I lost the urge to smoke and forgot about the lighter.

I was reminded of it a few minutes later, when I leaned forward to put my arm around one of the dogs and a giant flame seemed to leap out of Zade Heaven.

The dogs stared in amazement, and so did I because the crotch area of my jogging pants continued to smoulder, even though the flame was out.

I told you I was on fire today I think I'll have to bin the jogging pants, though

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

I was sitting on a futon with my laptop, trying to write a serious erotic poem. There was a dog either side of me, which didn't leave me with all that much space to store my lighter... so I put it between my legs.

It wasn't between my ankles, neither was it between my knees. We're talking upper thigh region here - just a centimetre or two away from Zade Heaven.

And after a while, I got so into my poem that I lost the urge to smoke and forgot about the lighter.

I was reminded of it a few minutes later, when I leaned forward to put my arm around one of the dogs and a giant flame seemed to leap out of Zade Heaven.

The dogs stared in amazement, and so did I because the crotch area of my jogging pants continued to smoulder, even though the flame was out.

I told you I was on fire today I think I'll have to bin the jogging pants, though

Yawn. Another typical day in the life of our plucky Cymric lesbean.

I like the part about "Zade heaven."

 

[scheherazade_79]

Yawn. Another typical day in the life of our plucky Cymric lesbean.

I like the part about "Zade heaven."

All good girls go to Zade Heaven

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

All good girls go to Zade Heaven

You wish . . .

 

[RogueLurker]

You wish . . .

No ... all the girls do.

 

[scheherazade_79]

You wish . . .

Nothing wrong with wishing

 

[scheherazade_79]

No ... all the girls do.

do they?

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

do they?

You said they did . . .

 

[scheherazade_79]

You said they did . . .

They're on their way, but there's been some kind of delay. I get my kicks whatever way I can in the meantime

 

[RogueLurker]

You said they did . . .

There you go ... if Zade says it, it must be true.

Flame on, baby ...

 

[scheherazade_79]

There you go ... if Zade says it, it must be true.

Flame on, baby ...

Of course! From the Book of Zade comes universal truth and hope.

 

[RogueLurker]

Of course! From the Book of Zade comes universal truth and hope.

I'd like to place an advance order for a copy of the Book of Zade ... I could use a bit of universal truth and hope.

BTW ... you were kind of lucky nothing got singed other than your sweatpants. Great story though ...

 

[Guest]

 

[RogueLurker]

From the Book of Zade:

And Lo! She spake to them from the depths of the burning bush.

"Render unto the Holy Zade the Water of Pellegrino, that I might extinguish my flaming crotch!"

Bwhahahahahahahahaha ......


Zade ... take me to the promised land ....

 

[scheherazade_79]

From the Book of Zade:

And Lo! She spake to them from the depths of the burning bush.

"Render unto the Holy Zade the Water of Pellegrino, that I might extinguish my flaming crotch!"

There wasn't any bush there to burn, but the water would have come in handy. Instead, I just had to strip. I've never taken my pants off so fast in my life

 

[scheherazade_79]

Bwhahahahahahahahaha ......


Zade ... take me to the promised land ....

Are you sure? It's kind of hot over there

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Burn baby burn.....disco inferno!!!

 

[scheherazade_79]

Burn baby burn.....disco inferno!!!

Behave yourself, you sadist! It could have resulted in a very nasty injury...

 

[Roxanne Appleby]

Of course! From the Book of Zade comes universal truth and hope.

Hope for heaven, from the burning bush . . .

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Behave yourself, you sadist! It could have resulted in a very nasty injury...

I would love to be the the ER when you walked in

 

[scheherazade_79]

I would love to be the the ER when you walked in

Walked? How optimistic No... that kind of emergency would warrant flashing blue lights, driving at breakneck speeds, an obscene quantity of prescription drugs, and a gynaecologist's chair with the stirrups spread out to the maximum angle and a circleof 'Fragile- Handle with Care' tape around the contraption.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Walked? How optimistic No... that kind of emergency would warrant flashing blue lights, driving at breakneck speeds, an obscene quantity of prescription drugs, and a gynaecologist's chair with the stirrups spread out to the maximum angle and a circleof 'Fragile- Handle with Care' tape around the contraption.

Jesus woman, is that a brush fire or a wild fire???

 

[Guest]

 

[scheherazade_79]

Hope for heaven, from the burning bush . . .

Hope for all womankind

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I crack me up.

Me too...LOL