If you cook like you walk, I would eat the whole plate.

[Huckleman2000]

The funniest line I'm aware of is a variation on an earlier post:

"Girl, I love those new shoes. You wanna fuck?"

Not that I would expect that to work, but even thinking about it makes me laugh. I could never say it with a straight face, though.

I understand the most successful line ever is:
"Hello. I'm Hugh Hefner."

It doesn't work with my name, though. And "Are you a model?" is just too sleazy.

My experience is that I'm an acquired taste, and if I try to move it along, I just screw it up.

 

[Belegon]

Tic-Tacs, actually.

so, mind if I freshen my breath for a little while?

 

[impressive]

No need for lines.

Line.

Allow me to paraphrase, then. No need to speak.

 

[Guest]

Just make sure his name really isn't Bob first.

Bob : "Uh, not, my name is not Bob." unless he was really stupid.

Wanna get naked and watch Dirty Dancing?

Prayers are answered!

 

[bashfull]

Hope I'm not intruding...

..thot I'd jump right in...

"Your legs are so smooth you must soak them in vasaline for hours..."---actually overheard a guy using this in a bar.

"Your beauty leaves me speechless, or it would if I unrolled my tongue.." --I am ashamed to admit that this one is mine though I've never used it.

and my favorite of all time (was actually used on me) "I can tell the future through a kiss...care to know your future?"

 

[Honey123]

*Bump*

Dont have any pick up lines..

I don't think I have ever picked a guy up!

 

[oggbashan]

Historic and sexist...

Can I help with the washing-up?

Og

 

[Honey123]

Is it hot in here, or is it you?

 

[bashfull]

*Bump*

Dont have any pick up lines..

I don't think I have ever picked a guy up!

Something tells me that you are always surrounded with choices and lines, hon.

 

[bashfull]

How about...

I bet my buddy that you taste like strawberries. Mind if I taste?

 

[elfin_odalisque]

Come into the garden, I'd like my roses to see you.

 

[Dar~]

Fropm a really drunk guy in a college bar: Baby, I love every bone in your body. Especially mine.

Is that a mirror in your pocket b/c I swear I can see myself in your pants.

Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven?

 

[Stella_Omega]

I always did.

The spontaneous stuff, the really out-of-the-blue stuff, I had to do right there in the bar. I fingered a girl to orgasm once, but she was NOT game to go someplace else. All the ones who felt like accompanying me had been assiduously 'worked' for a while. They have to know they can trust you.

You dummy, you shouldn't have fingered her all the way!
"...halfway to orgasm, then she followed me and my fingers home..."
I asked a woman: "Can we meet in half an hour? " She looked nervous; "Um, you mean for coffee?"
I said "well, we can start with coffee if you like..."
and- it WORKED!
probably not because of the line though. Probably because she felt like it.

 

[yui]

Just make sure his name really isn't Bob first.

Well, I mean, this would work great in a club in Hong Kong, anyway.

The funniest line I'm aware of is a variation on an earlier post:

"Girl, I love those new shoes. You wanna fuck?"

Not that I would expect that to work, but even thinking about it makes me laugh. I could never say it with a straight face, though.

Saying it with a straight face wouldn't work. Laughing, that would work.

so, mind if I freshen my breath for a little while?

Yui, the 1 ½ calorie breath mint!

Allow me to paraphrase, then. No need to speak.

*cough* Line.

Prayers are answered!

Yes, they are ... give me twenty, Hail Carsons and let's dance naked. You bring the log and I'll bring ... um, well, something!

..thot I'd jump right in...

"Your legs are so smooth you must soak them in vasaline for hours..."---actually overheard a guy using this in a bar.

"Your beauty leaves me speechless, or it would if I unrolled my tongue.." --I am ashamed to admit that this one is mine though I've never used it.

and my favorite of all time (was actually used on me) "I can tell the future through a kiss...care to know your future?"

Please, jump right in the middle, Bashfull! Love the Fortune Telling Kiss. *filing away for future reference*

*Bump*

Dont have any pick up lines..

I don't think I have ever picked a guy up!

Thanks for the bump!

Of course not! No lines needed; you are honey, sticky and sweet.

Can I help with the washing-up?

Og

And I'm only slightly bemused by this line, Og.

Come into the garden, I'd like my roses to see you.

Oh, that's a good one, too!

Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven?

I've heard this one a time or two.

You dummy, you shouldn't have fingered her all the way!
"...halfway to orgasm, then she followed me and my fingers home..."
I asked a woman: "Can we meet in half an hour? " She looked nervous; "Um, you mean for coffee?"
I said "well, we can start with coffee if you like..."
and- it WORKED!
probably not because of the line though. Probably because she felt like it.

It was you. She wanted you and wanted to.

 

[Honey123]

Something tells me that you are always surrounded with choices and lines, hon.

Nah. Mostly I think people look at me b/c I have something on my face.

 

[bashfull]

Nah. Mostly I think people look at me b/c I have something on my face.

Here's a line.....

Something on your face? How about me?


<<ok, can't believe I said that>>>

 

[Honey123]

Here's a line.....

Something on your face? How about me?


<<ok, can't believe I said that>>>

LOL

Now that's a LINE!

 

[SeaCat]

Yui,

I would never use a line per se on you, but I bet I would shock the hell out of anyone nearby.

All I would do would be walk up to you.

"Hi I'm.................. (You know my name so I won't put it here.)"
I would then very casually(sp) pick you up in my arms and walk out of whereever we had met. (If it was chilly out I would first drape my jacket around your shoulders.)

Then again I believe in being direct, and you would also know I was showing up with my very unconventional mindset.

Cat

 

[wishfulthinking]

I usually ask questions that don't have a yes or no answer. It could be about anything. eg "what are you drinking?" or if really desperate "where is the ladies room?" and then start chatting.

I save the "I dumped my last boyfriend because he wouldn't give me enough sex" for special occassions.

 

[sincerely_helene]

Nah. Mostly I think people look at me b/c I have something on my face.

Really? I don't believe I've ever come across your face before.

 

[RuReal]

Ok my fav. It was a joke a friend of mine used I would say they would eather get her to laugh or get you slapped!

"If you are what you eat will I look like you in the morning?"

Number 2!

"Why isn't my head burried between your thighs!"

 

[Honey123]

Really? I don't believe I've ever come across your face before.

'coz you're not like most people...you da bomb!

 

[EmeraldKitten]

This thread is so fun.


It wasn't meant as a pick up line... this guy at work just likes to mess with me.

I walked in this evening, and he says:
"Hey, come here a second."
So I walk over to him.
He takes his time checking out my chest.
He then says:

"Now that I've seen your cleavage, I'm going to go home and beat my cock like it owes me money."

*Rolling around, laughing uncontrollably*

I turned beet red.... from embarassment or lack of oxygen, I'm not sure which, LOL.

 

[wishfulthinking]

"Now that I've seen your cleavage, I'm going to go home and beat my cock like it owes me money."

I can see why You go girl!

 

[EmeraldKitten]

I can see why You go girl!

Thank you.

Oh god, everytime I think about it I crack up.
The more I consider it, that line might actually work on me, LMFAO.