If I'm a flirt does that mean I have no brain???

[StondTmplPilot]

Re: Ohhhh boy ...

Originally posted by KillerMuffin

You're one dimensional. You are extremely selfish.
You have no substance. I find you boring.


Here we fucking well go again! ~sigh~

KM, why is it that you feel the need lately to spout such anger and hate toward people that do you no harm? You're like a friggin pit bull!

I use to really enjoy reading your posts ... but, you have been so vindictive and harsh the past couple of days, I'm really tempted to push the ignore button on you.

Got the rag on? A bad case of PMS?

Have you read her PMDD thread, I think that might go along way towards explaining this.

 

[Cath!]

This is a good question, do we make assumptions about people just by what we think we see?

Bingo, baby!

 

[estevie]

Bingo, baby!

Goddamn, I'm insightful today!

 

[girl]

This is a good question, do we make assumptions about people just by what we think we see?

Okay, I'm confused. I would think this is obvious. Everyone's perceptions are different and everyone believes what s/he thinks s/he sees. So we make assumptions (not just about people, but everything) based on what we think we see. Yes, that's absolutely true. I can't base an assumption or an opinion on something I think I don't see...Or I don't think I see...or ...something?


girl

 

[nasty]

Um...I already know you don't have a brain.

 

[Cherry]

~ nodding ~

Have you read her PMDD thread, I think that might go along way towards explaining this.

Yup ... just did today. It certainly does.

~ cutting KM a little slack ~

 

[YogiBare]

It's a funny place.

Hi estevie. I think that the internet is pretty two dimensional in terms og how people appear. There is a temptation to believe that what you see of a person here is all that there is to them. You have a right to go for whatever type of non-harmful-to-others enjoyment that you come here to get. I f you come here primarily to flirt, that's fine. It doesn't hurt me. And sometimes I get annoyed with myself for being too intense here, anyhow. But I'm a pretty intense person.

I do have a problem with KM saying that you are selfish for withholding other parts of yourself, as if you owe it to the rest of us to share more of yourself with us. I don't think so. We each have the right to share as much or as little as we choose. Conversely, a mirror can only reflect back that which it is shown. Sounds to me like you're beginning to reevaluate whether you might want different kinds of interaction than you thought you did when you arrived here. It's all fine. You're not hurting anyone. It's 100% your call.

 

[estevie]

Okay, I'm confused. I would think this is obvious. Everyone's perceptions are different and everyone believes what s/he thinks s/he sees. So we make assumptions (not just about people, but everything) based on what we think we see. Yes, that's absolutely true. I can't base an assumption or an opinion on something I think I don't see...Or I don't think I see...or ...something?


girl

Yes, but do you take your perceptions of someone and make judgements about their character, morals, intelligence, etc..without ever getting to know them? Does your intial thought about somebody prohibit you from seeing them in any other way?

 

[nasty]

*Pouts* I see you completely ignored me. Was it something I said?

 

[Mischka]

Originally posted by estevie
I wanted opinions on my question...do we judge people ONLY by what you see on the board?

I do. There are too many people around here for me to invest the time to find out everything about each person, so I base my (initial) opinions on people's contributions to threads. In return, I expect no greater effort from anyone else in unwraveling me.

I found it extraordinarily humorous that a few people have labeled the flirting threads as "fun" and the serious threads as "intellectual exercises." I would prefer a root canal to engaging in the flirting threads. The only flirty thread I've contributed to is the Big Comfy Couch thread, and that was to post a picture of an actual couch (I was furniture shopping at the time). I royally suck at flirting on-line, and flirting holds zero interest for me.

For me, the serious threads are fun, and I fully expect people to judge me based on my participation in those threads. To many here, I come across as unapproachable, serious, and academic. Am I like that in real life? Of course not. Am I like that here? For the most part, yes.

If Lit were a real-life gathering, we would get to know each other more fully than we can through mere words on this bulletin board. However, I suspect that even if that were true, we would all stick to the same groups, more or less. Could anyone see juicylips and lavender hanging out in real life? Probably not. Would anyone be surprised to see Problem Child, DCL, KM, Dillinger, and Purple Haze engaged in a poker game? No. My point - we all judge each other based on our participation in Lit, and though that may only afford a cursory analysis of each of our characters, I still maintain that it would not be that far from our reactions to each other in reality.

 

[estevie]

Re: It's a funny place.

[B Conversely, a mirror can only reflect back that which it is shown. Sounds to me like you're beginning to reevaluate whether you might want different kinds of interaction than you thought you did when you arrived here. It's all fine. You're not hurting anyone. It's 100% your call. [/B]

I think you are correct, Yogi!

And, I also learned something else about myself today. My own perception of me is wacked! LOL

 

[YogiBare]

estevie

And, I also learned something else about myself today. My own perception of me is wacked! LOL

Isn't life grand?

 

[estevie]

Re: estevie

Isn't life grand?

Yes...yes, today it truly is!

 

[girl]

Yes, but do you take your perceptions of someone and make judgements about their character, morals, intelligence, etc..without ever getting to know them?

Based on what they show me, yes. If I see something of interest to me (or they see something of interest in me to them), then the chances of us getting to know each other better are increased.

Does your intial thought about somebody prohibit you from seeing them in any other way?

Certainly not. There are a few people here that I didn't initially like when I first came to the board, but having read subsequent posts by them (where they showed other facets of their personality), I found that they seemed much more 'likeable' to me than previously.

The question that's becoming apparent is whose 'responsibility' is it to initiate the 'getting to know someone better?'

If you show me nothing but flirty behavior and I find that behavior to be silly if it's the only thing you post, is it *my* responsibility to seek you out and find out about all the multiple wonderful facets of your personality?

In my opinion, no. It's your responsibility to show some of those other facets of your personality if you want people who think excessive flirtiness is silly or boring to think you're more than just one-dimensional. If you don't care whether people like that (like me) think you're one-dimensional, then that's fine. And there are lots of folks who don't think being overly flirty is silly or boring. And that's fine too. They will seek you out and get to know those other wonderful facets that you have.

I'm sure you're a very nice, sincere and good person. That's what I assume most people are. It may be true, it may not, but I don't hold it against you that you prefer to just flirt on the boards. I just don't find myself interested in you if that's all you care to show.

My .02,
girl

 

[SA Storm]

.

 

[Guest]

What a boring thread this is.

 

[nasty]

What a boring thread this is.

What an ass this is.

 

[nasty]

Flirt all ya want, hun. It's a great way to meet people. I'll tell ya, the reason I started flirting with you,(not only because you're HOT!!!!!!!!)but, when I 1st saw a pic of you, you looked to be around my age,(22 btw.)

 

[Tim1]

wow

After reading everyone of the contributors in this thread, it only goes to show that there are as many people as there are opinions. If flirting floats your boat...big fuckin deal. If trying to expose your brains on every thread is your deal, knock yourself out. As for me, I come here as I have said before to entertain myself. I come and I go as time allows. If I don't measure up to someones idea of what they want me to be...I'm all broken up about it. But "Frankly my dear I don't give a damn"


Carry on estevie

 

[talk2024]

I'll echo Tim's comments... in reading everything through, it's evident that people were carrying judgements around because a lot of words posted were subsequently twisted and turned upside down where generalised comments were taken as personal affronts and I sincerely doubt that was the point of asking a simple question about how people are perceived on the BB.
On the plus side, no one seemed too afraid to share an opinion

 

[patient1]

Southern and I talk all the time about my posting style. I tend to stay away from the more serious threads and just trade flirts back and forth. Modest Mouse said that I surprised him on occasion by posting somewhere I would not normally be.

My question is this...do we assume people are only a certain way because of their posting ways? I realize if I posted more serious things people will see that side of me...but because I choose not to, does that make me just a flirt with nothing of importance to say?

I come to the board to laugh and have fun, that is the side of me I portray here. Is there something wrong with that?

I read the whole thread. I'll share my impression of you, because
you said you wanted to hear it:

I know next to nothing of you. I've read enough of your posts to be able to match your name & avatar, but the only impression I had of your posts was that you flirt with Southern. In my mind, that doesn't even classify you as a flirt.

You're like wallpaper, there all the time, but barely noticable.
I have no idea if you're shallow or wise.

Shy would be my best guess.

I often come here to have fun. There's nothing wrong with that.