Idea for a Non-Erotic

[MayorReynolds]

I've been kicking around an idea in my head for a Non-Erotic. It's about a guy who comes to find out that he's fated to die in order to save his young niece. The idea sprang up out of stuff for my own life and some occasional white-knight tendencies that I have.

I think the central message of the story would be that in most cases we choose our own destiny, but there are rare instances where the pieces align in just the right way that we have no choice.

Another thing I wanted to do was have a countdown clock ticking down to the main character's last moments. They'd be headers laid out like this: 18:02:15:09 (18 days, 2 hours, 15 minutes, 9 seconds). At first the reader wouldn't know what the countdown clock was for but over the course of the story it would become clearer.

The niece character is 15. I'm aware of Lit's no-sex policy involving minors and I would make it clear at the beginning that this is a no-sex story as well as ensure that in the story. But it would be important to the narrative that the niece is out of control, a habitual drinker, acting out because of how lost and broken her own mother is. That's another element to the story: the uncle (Billy) has been taking care of his sister his whole life and now he has to watch over the next generation.

So what do you guys think? Would that fly here? I've already penned a couple of sex stories on Lit and for my next submission I wanted to do something sweet and heartwarming.

 

[Sean Renaud]

Of course it would fly, how many readers you'd get is another question entirely since this is a porn site, non-erotic exists for reasons that nobody can really figure out. But if that's not a problem for you by all means. I wouldn't even really make a big deal out of pointing out there is no sex or none with the 15 year old. That should go without saying.

Though I personally would bump her up to 18 and add sex. Not for the sake of sex I remember being a teenager, I don't really buy that there are fifteen year olds who are out of control, drinking, lashing out and aren't getting laid. I might not bother doing a sex scene so much as just having her stumble out of her "Friend's" van hair disheveled and clothing half on. So on and so forth.

It's certainly a good story idea. Was there something specific you needed help with ?

 

[MayorReynolds]

Of course it would fly, how many readers you'd get is another question entirely since this is a porn site, non-erotic exists for reasons that nobody can really figure out. But if that's not a problem for you by all means. I wouldn't even really make a big deal out of pointing out there is no sex or none with the 15 year old. That should go without saying.

Though I personally would bump her up to 18 and add sex. Not for the sake of sex I remember being a teenager, I don't really buy that there are fifteen year olds who are out of control, drinking, lashing out and aren't getting laid. I might not bother doing a sex scene so much as just having her stumble out of her "Friend's" van hair disheveled and clothing half on. So on and so forth.

It's certainly a good story idea. Was there something specific you needed help with ?

The only problem with bumping her up to 18 is that the uncle is granted temporary custody of her because her mom ends up in a psych ward, the idea being that he becomes a surrogate parent/father figure. At first she's prone to sneaking out at all hours and misbehaving but bonds with him over video games or sushi or whatever until he ultimately absorbs some bullets to keep her safe. 18-year-olds are free to move out and do whatever they want; the niece could just say "fuck you very much, Uncle Billy," and book.

And there is one thing I have questions about. The uncle has a brother who runs a junkyard and accidentally acquires a tire knocker from him. The tire knocker is important because it's what he uses to save his niece at the end. I was thinking about a scene where the brother shows Uncle Billy how to use it as a weapon (like a knife instead of a club, jab and cleave instead of swing, etc.). Then I started thinking if I'd run into trouble for posting instructions on using deadly weapons (and a tire knocker is considered a felony weapon if the wrong person has it.)

Honestly I've questioned the existence of 'Non-erotic' myself but I figured it was a place to pen tales in a sort of cooling off period. Perhaps this would be better-suited somewhere else though. Like you said, this IS a porn site and I do feel more comfortable posting erotica instead of stuff like this.

 

[Sean Renaud]

The vast majority of 18 year olds lack the funding to go out on their own and while a 15 year old can't legally do so unless he chains her to the bed she has the same ability to say "fuck you I'm out" and leave an never return. Still, do as you want, Iwas merely suggesting that a young virgin holligan is one of those things that's hard to buy.

It is said that in fiction you can ask your audience to believe the impossible but not the improbable.

You don't need to go into details on how to use the weapon, just that it was explained to her. The same way we never see how someone learns martial arts. They find the ancient master, have a goddamn montage and *poof* knowledge gained.

There is no reason not to post it here and elsewhere. I have a couple stories that are in multiple places around the web.